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Ten Men Magazine decided to get inside avant garde designer Bernhard Willhelm’s head for their 20th issue. Photographed by Christian Anwander and interviewed by Richard Gray, here’s 9 of the 10 wacky questions and answers, straight from the mind of madness…I hope you can read German!

1) What’s the theme tune to your life?

BW: Antonio Vivaldi’s The Four Seasons.

2) What’s your fantasy pet?

BW: A body double.

3) You’ve won the lottery! What will you buy?

BW: A night with Chad Hunt.

4) There’s a fire! Quick, run! But what one thing will you save?

BW: My hot bed of elegance.

5) Which person would you most like to thank?

BW: YES MAN.

6) Heaven is…?

BW: What we love:

-Birds flying towards us and then flying away again.

-The moments between moments, when you’re happy.

-Cafes with two guests and a dog.

-Streets made of golden sunlight.

-Meat and dumplings at home.

-The high of sex.

-A lot of money when we earn it, not later when we spend it.

-Art at the moment it’s created.

-Something too expensive that we can afford.

-A certain smile.

-Elephant showers.

-Death, as long as we’re not dying.

7) Who is your comic-book hero?

BW: Nicolas Sarkozy

Why do you do what you do?

BW: Because of this: überall, welcher junge Mann bis 30 möchte von 40-jährigem gefickt werden? Auch sehr junge Typen, denen das Loch juckt, mögen sich melden! Gern NRW-B-NL. T21-5.

9) What keeps you up at night?

BW: The rabbit in the corner.

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