Can’t You Just Taste The Filth?!

Edited by Zmaji Robinson

Every time I convince myself that I’m AM NOT going to talk about people no more, someone shows up and makes diarrhea all over my resolution. Dear, dear, sweet and virginal Pam Anderson showed up at Art Basel lookin a warm, moist, diseased mess. I’m so disappointed that this woman had reproduced……….I mean actual spawn from her vagina cavelet. I know I want to look in the tabloids and see my mothers cellulitus and pregnancy stretch marks. There’s a porno slut somewhere in a dumpster getting the business to the face saying, “Oh my God, Pam Anderson is so trashy! She has no shame.”

Y’know I never really cared when old dudes would get all sentimental about how hot Farrah Fawcett USED 2 WUZ, but now that Pam M’Lamb has gone from Baywatch scene stealer to resembling pulverized hooker puss, I can hear depression trying to break in my front door with a pair of scissors and a bottle of Oxycontin. Now I’m considering turning to hard drinking……………maybe motor oil or bleach.

- Z’maji of HauteBlogXOXO

Sasha Fierce Got The Crazies All In Her Eyes!

Edited by Zmaji Robinson

Oooo Beyonce, you so dif’rent and stuffz! Here’s Beyonkey Donkey(I mean that with the utmost obsessive desire) gracing the cover of Elle in what has to be the most gangsta promotions blitz since Comb-Over Trump bulldogged his way onto every morning show to rip Rosie O’Donnell a gaping new birthin’ shoot. I wonder if Grace Jones knows that Beyonce challenging her swag? Clearly this new dark chapter in B-style is leading up to the looks that Thierry Mugler will be designing for her tour. Now THAT, Indies, makes me so happy, I’m having a happy ending right now………………..and you’ve all be a part of it…………Now Put A Ring On It!

I’m personally enjoying her departure from her signature, wholesome, southern pageant girl sparkles………………….of course I’d suck her putrid toes after she’d finished the New York marathon in air tight shoes and no socks on………..don’t judge me!
Yawl know Beyonce gets me to sweatin’ like some Las Vegas hos at a Baptist Virginity Declaration ceremony.

- Z’maji of HauteBlogXOXO

Magazine Scans courtesy of beyonceworld.net

Been There….Done That……HATED IT……Still Do!

Edited by Zmaji Robinson

Anybody Wanna Make Some Extra Mid-Morning Liquor Money……….

Edited by Zmaji Robinson

………..THEN BRING ME A DIDDY HEAD IN A KFC BOX. Not only is Diddly Bop raping us raw with new “product” with I Am King the fragrance, now we Bond movie aficionados have to prepare plans of retaliation at the thought of Diddy conning his way into being the next Bond. When I first viewed this abomination, I could have flown away to fashion purgatory with the KIDZ where Drags in polyester make everyone watch reworkings of Heatherette shows and sip tepid Appletinis before a sing-along of I’m Half The Man I Used To Be. No, wait, after I watched this video I wanted to do m’self a favor, snatch out my eyes and eat them on a soda cracker with Beluga so I wouldn’t have to see his face again. Wait, wait, I got more. After I watched this I wanted to send Diddy a ticking, smoking package that read “URGENT, OPEN IMMEDIATELY”…………I might have gone to far now!

I love to attention whore m’self to the masses just like any other manly diva, but at least I have the dignity to whore m’self for free………y’know like classy people……..like a lady! Have you ever wanted to kick yourself in the naughty bitz until you bled into your internal organs and went into septic shock and ended yourself? Well if not don’t watch this because the temptation is real.

-Z’maji of HauteBlogXOXO

Trendspark: Photo-Shop Overkill “Airbrush Me Till I Look Like That Other Hoe!”

Edited by Zmaji Robinson

The Bashed: Mikaeel Jackson

Edited by Zmaji Robinson

Hannah’s Got A Brand New Rag! Get A Rope!

Edited by Zmaji Robinson

F*ck Ups: Selma Hayek

Edited by Zmaji Robinson