Best Shampoo

Pantene Pro-V Restoratives Time Renewal Shampoo

The archetypal Pantene girl has hair so shiny, you can almost see your reflection in it. Rich in cuticle-smoothing silicon, the bestselling Time Renewal Shampoo may not carry any natural credentials, but it can be relied on to give hair a soft-as-silk finish that makes you want to run your fingers through it all day long.

Best Conditioner

John Frieda Brilliant Brunette, Sheer Blonde and Radiant Red Conditioner

For such a reasonable price, the softening results of John Frieda’s color conditioners are undeniably good. The purple-toned Sheer Blonde eliminates brassiness, Brilliant Brunette gives multidimensional shine to coffee-colored hair and Radiant Red stops auburn hair looking washed out. Aussie 3 Minute Miracle, the peachy balm that deep-conditions in next to no time, came a close second.

Best Styling Product

John Frieda Frizz-Ease Serum

Launched in 1990, this serum is a godsend for unruly locks, sealing moisture into curly and straight hair, so it falls either in perfectly formed ringlets or in a glassy curtain. And don’t we know it. It sells at a breakneck rate – 3½ bottles a minute in 2007. There are now four formulas: the original, extra-strength, one for heat protection and an overnight serum. The runner-up was Elnett hairspray, the session hairstylist’s choice for lasting hold.

Best Eye Shadow

Mac Eye Shadow

No matter how enticing it looks in the pot, the key to a good eye shadow is that the color stays true on your eyelids. This is where Mac excels. Its richly pigmented eye shadows come in a colossal range of 158 shades and eight finishes, from matte (the pro’s favorite) to iridescent frost. A back-stage staple at fashion shows, these pots are a joy for amateurs, too, providing easy-to-control color that glides on evenly.

Best Mascara

Max Factor Masterpiece Max

A previous Style winner, Masterpiece Max is the bestseller of Max Factor’s 11 mascara formulations. It claims to amplify lashes by 400% thanks to a rubbery, multi-pronged wand that transforms stumpy lashes into a thick, fluttering curtain. It flies off the shelves – one is sold every five seconds – and comes in three colours: black, black/brown and navy.

Best Foundation

Max Factor

There are six foundation formulas in the Max Factor range. The bestseller, and the most innovative, is the recently launched Miracle Touch Liquid Illusion. A compact that transforms from a solid formula into a lightweight liquid on contact with the skin, it minimizes pores and irons out imperfections without masking the skin’s natural luminosity.

Best Lipstick

Lancôme These days, lipsticks are so advanced that you should expect them to provide colour with clout and keep lips moist at the same time. Lancôme Le Rouge Absolu combats dryness with a water-catching polymer that is said to keep lips moist for six hours. You’re in good company if you wear it – Sienna Miller and Jessica Biel are fans. Your second choice, Dior Rouge Dior, comes in 35 shades and has a collagen-boosting formula.

Best Nail Polish

Revlon Nail Enamel

Revlon has managed to build a global cosmetics brand out of Revlon Red Nail Enamel, the first product it launched, in 1932, so it’s no surprise that it has sold more than 30m bottles since. The foolproof formula goes on in a thick, smooth layer, providing a durable coating of the perfect femme fatale red that has bombshells such as Halle Berry and Jessica Alba hooked.

Best Facial Moisturizer

Clinique We’re finally buying moisturisers that offer turbo-powered protection against future damage. Clinique’s bestselling antiageing moisturiser is Superdefense Triple Action Moisturizer. Packed with in free-radical-fighting antioxidants, it provides UVA/UVB filters to shield skin from the sun – the worst culprit when it comes to wrinkles and uneven skin tone. It comes in three formulas for different skin types and has a satisfying nongreasy finish.

Best Body Moisturiser

The Body Shop Body Butter

Body Butter is a rich body cream made from fair-trade shea or cocoa butter. Since its launch in 1992, it has become a tried and trusted favourite that locks in moisture and smells good enough to eat. There are now 15 varieties, including coconut, mango, pink grapefruit and moringa, which smells wonderfully clean and is brimming with fatty acids to give supple skin. A close second was Palmer’s Cocoa Butter Formula, for its emollient consistency.

Best Ethical Brand

Origins Organics

Organic beauty products are no longer just a well-meaning sideline. In 2006, the market in the UK was worth more than £2 billion – and the big brands are taking note. Origins Organics, a range of nine products, bears stamps of approval from three organic governing bodies: the US Department of Agriculture, Ecocert and the Soil Association. Try the Body Pampering Massage Oil, a 98%-organic blend of essential oils in a sumptuous jojoba-oil base.

Best Fragrance

Chanel No 5

When Coco Chanel commissioned her perfumer to create Chanel No 5 in 1921, she insisted on excessive quantities of jasmine, claiming that she wanted to make “the most expensive perfume in the world”. It paid off. The first to use synthetic floral aldehydes as top notes, giving it that grown-up, almost powdery smell, it is arguably the best-known fragrance in the world. It has an illustrious fan base, too: in the 1950s, Marilyn Monroe said that two drops of No 5 was all she wore in bed. Chanel is launching a modern interpretation called Au Première in October – you heard it here first.

Best Self-Tan for the Body

Johnson’s Holiday Skin

When it launched in 2005, Holiday Skin was an instant hit that spawned countless of imitations. It sold out so quickly that bidding wars started on eBay, where eager customers paid upwards of £40 a bottle. An innovative moisturiser/fake-tan hybrid, the gradual tanner promises a natural-looking glow, not a streaky finish. The improved formula promises to keep skin moisturised for 24 hours.

Best Bargain Buy

Vaseline Lip Therapy

Although it is made of petroleum jelly, a petrochemical many eco-beauty consumers do their utmost to avoid, the cute, retro-looking tin and comforting slip it gives to lips (and any other parts you choose to soothe) make Vaseline Lip Therapy a favored bargain buy. There are now aloe vera and SPF versions.

Best Beauty Website

Boots.com

With branches of Boots on every high street, and in train stations across the land, you would have thought that picking up everyday beauty essentials couldn’t get much more convenient. Then it launched a website. It’s not all toothpaste and cotton-wool pads, though. Visit the online Beauty Boutique and you can stock up on luxurious products from the likes of Urban Retreat, This Works and Caudalie at the click of a mouse.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Letterman calls Paris Hilton an “entrepreneur”. I think he meant genital wart on the vadge of society.

Last year Paris had her name on a nightclub, Carl JR’s hamburgers, a perfume line, a clothing line and some shoes.

This year it’s canned champaign, a doll, hair extensions, and doggie clothes.

I hate to break the news. But I think we can safely break the news that Paris is in a downward spiral. Getting old suck for a Hilton

P.S. Love how she instantaneously places her hand on her hip when she walks out. Did she think the bright studio lights were paparazzi. Oh, the joys of fame.

Popularity: 1% [?]

Remember when pomegranates first hit the street. Within a few weeks you couldn’t escape them. Pomegranate tea, pomegranate cocktails, Pomegranate flavored condoms. Everywhere you looked the antioxidant was attached.  Well now a new antioxidant has hit the streets of Manhattan, but this time it’s ready with a slew of products set for you consumption and a perfect little boutique where you can find it all. Mastiha is an all natural health goody that’s an anti-inflammatory, anti-bacterial resin which is only found on the Greek Island of Chios. It’s harvested from the sap of evergreen bushes and can only be found at Mastihashop (145 Orchard Street, New York, NY 10079).

In use for over 2,500 years the sap has been claimed to freshen breath, fight plaque and gingivitis, heal and regenerate skin, relieve ulcers, ease digestion and strengthen hair and nails. Oh snap, I think pomegranate just got bitch slapped.

The shop, headed by sisters Kalliopi and Artemis Kohas who grew up with Mastiha as a staple, carries a wide range of beauty products and other goodies featuring the sap including some very covettable chocolate-covered pistachio bonbons.

Mastihashop
145 Orchard Street
New York, NY 10079 map
tel. 1 212 253 0895

Popularity: 1% [?]

Did you ever wish your Maybeline or your Red Bull had the wonderful trace of human afterbirth? Yum, love those fetal escrements. Well if you’re a disgusting baby eater, the Japanese got what ‘cha need. A company called, Q-Bit, has a beauty line of drinks, pills, jellies and face masks all with purified placenta. Of course I’m so friggin’ dramatic that I’ve led you to believe that it’s human placenta when it’s actually pig………..of course placenta is disgusting no matter what mammal it was harvested from. Asians do seem to find benefit and use for any and everthing anyway, but this is still a bit shocking. Now they say it’s a pig BUT remember there are face creams that have baby boy foreskin in them to combat those eye wrinkles………sooooo, there’s a possibility that you could be smearing fetal poo all over your face, how unsavoury!

Popularity: 1% [?]

Tan 

Tanner 

Tannest… 

Nothing says”I’m a famous designer from the 80s” better than having overly tanned, leather-like skin. The Costume Bash at the MET brought out a who’s who of crypt ready keepers of couture, who made most of the room smell like fresh slabs of beef jerky. Mmm, delicious.

To achieve this oh so fabulous look, spend at least 10-15 hours a day in a tanning bed covered in butter and select spices from the Roberto Cavalli seasoning collection. Soon your skin will become untouchable, for fear that even the slightest brush up will send enough pain to your system and evoke an instant seizure. Swallowing your tongue is so not stylish. Once you have burned through your epidermis, begin peeling off your alligator like hide. Underneath you will find perfectly fresh, Donatella Versace-like skin that will leave all in awe of your fabulous beauty and crisp orange skin.  Wallow in their envy of you. Repeat as necessary.

Popularity: 1% [?]