Let this be a lesson to all you aspiring models out there. You can’t maintain that svelt figure into your 30s without proper diet, excersise, and daily lines of blow off of Pete Doherty’s babyshambles.

LINK LOVE: Daily Mail

I think I just found Becks Halloween costume. Cause nothing strikes fear more than a mother of 12 on welfare. Nothing!!!

Make no mistake we LOVE  peacock feathers as accessories and can live with it  as a print. We also adore Leigh Lezark, from Misshapes, but seeing her wearing this outfit awakes only one reaction; WTF?!

In case you guys didn’t know…I live in the BX!

Are we still lovin’ African inspired print fashions?  Hero or Zero?

Reminds me of one of our most popular posts: 10 Ghetto Fab Don’ts.

Yep, looks like a good Saturday night to me…

Well…you guys all know how we feel about Ed Hardy, so it’s not even worth the time!

I am now about to go on a rant about how much I don’t like the Midwest:

My sister is currently texting me with live updates of her trip to the Verizon store in Ann Arbor.  This further explains why my sister and I are the same person:

“Hot pink dollar store flip flops, white sweat pant shorts up the butt. One of those initial purses from Claire’s (you can see it better in the second pic), Brooklyn USA tank, having a conversation about tanning and more. Oh, and fake Oakley sunglasses. And Cosmo in her purse.”

I couldn’t believe this was true..but it gets better

“Well I’m like fifth in line and it’s hilarious. I thought you’d enjoy. Oh now she’s discussing what shampoo to use. Pulled out a notebook to record ‘big sexy hair.’ Classy”

I conclude, Michigan people not only lack style, but they find themselves thinking that they are in tune to what’s ‘fashionable’ or ‘in right now.’  You can bash and hate me all you want, but I have lived here for twenty one years. I know what’s going on.

Another update:

“Holy crap! Another lady in here: Crocs, khaki capris, red baggy tee with what appears to be a huge drool spot, frizzy hair. You would hate it here. Or die.”

And I would like to close with:

“Gold pants. The lady next to me has a bruised swollen face from plastic surgery. This place is insane. Girl in front of me in an all black dressy outfit, brown purse, and white Nike grandma walking shoes.”

Rescue me. Rescue me now.

I’m sure you know what ‘Winkers’ are by now, those jeans that make your ass wink..but did you know you can DIY them? Just cut holes in your pants and don’t wear underwear….

EW.

LINK LOVE: Vice

There are things worse than wearing last seasons Herve Ledger. It’s called People of Walmart. This is their style blog.

Imagine the sweatiest event of your life. Perhaps it was during that marathon you ran in Phoenix, Arizona or possibly that 100 degree scorcher when your air-conditioning cut out…whatever the case may be, try to relive that sweat. Now, take that sweat, times it by 3 days, 80,000 music freaks, less than 3 inches between you and the drunkard next to you and you’ve got yourself a typical Lollapalooza music festival. Throw in some humidity, 6 hours worth of rain, thousands of 24 oz Bud Lights, some horse manure scented mud and you’ve got Lollapalooza 2009 down to a science. Welcome, my friends, to the most brilliant weekend of my life (and that’s no exaggeration.)

I had envisioned this post looking something like Hedi Slimane’s photo-journal after he attended Coachella back in April; something containing photos of well dressed and flawlessly styled potential models. This next statement may be a generalization and offensive to some, but through my Fashion Indie opinionated eyes, EVERYONE LOOKED LIKE SHIT. Love handles stuck out of trashy booty shorts. Cargo shorts and graphic tees comprised the male population. Ray Ban shades were in a nauseating full effect. Trust me when I say that there was not a single person worth wasting a megapixel of my Nikon D50. But in everyone’s defense, it did rain quite a bit, mud caked Grant Park and it was pushing 100 degrees on a daily basis. So, if your excuse for slacking on style was in preservation of you Alexander Wang swag, you’ve been forgiven. As for the rest of you, I’m severely disappointed.

But all fashion zeros aside, Lollapalooza 2009 will go down in Kirby history as an all-time fantastic weekend. My friend Amber and I met up with some of my NYU buds, as well as some of last year’s festival friends and some new ones, and enjoyed the sounds and sights of some of the world’s most talented music artists. Although I saw over 50 shows in total, there are the significant few that really stuck out in my mind:

Animal Collective, despite my having almost died of suffocation from moshing, was an absolutely amazing show. I mean, come on, who doesn’t want to hear a 15 minute version of “Brother Sport” while watching the sun set over Lake Michigan? Crystal Castles, needless to say, was a shit-show…but in the best way possible! Lead singer Alice Glass was a classy lady chugging from her bottle of Bacardi Superior between songs, taking drags from her cigarette throughout and hawking spit in the crowd. Although I only caught a few of Passion Pit’s songs, they certainly didn’t fail to stir those butterflies I get every time I hear “Sleepyhead.” Andrew Bird relaxed the crowd with his melodic violin licks and whistles and was a perfect example of pure talent. Vampire Weekend, as always, put on a high energy set and left the crowd practically drooling over some of the new songs they whipped out. MSTRKRFT reigned as my favorite of the Lollapalooza 2009 DJ sets, completely blowing what Bassnectar, DeadMau5 and The Bloody Beetroots had to offer out of the water. Despite my former biases for Kings of Leon and The Killers, both groups (with the help of a few energetic friends and a bit of booze) rocked the house…nothing beats soaking in 80,000 bobbing heads and waving hands as I sat atop some 6′5″ stud’s shoulders (thanks Evan!) rocking out of The Killers’ “Human.”

But if one band really sealed the deal on this year’s Lollapalooza experience, the award goes to none other than the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. As one of the Saturday night headliners, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs had some very big shoes to fill after they replaced The Beastie Boys’ slot (due to Adam Yauch’s cancer surgery). Many Lolla-goers had their doubts about the Yeah Yeah Yeahs headlining performance, saying that they weren’t yet popular or experienced enough to deserve a coveted main-stage concert. Well, let’s just say those nay-sayers are biting their tongues because the Yeah Yeah Yeahs stole Lollapalooza 2009. There’s not much else to say except for the fact that their performance was outstanding, complete with high energy, humble recognition of such an amazing opportunity and a fantastic sound. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, lead singer Karen O is a rockstar.

So, are you itching for next August yet so you can plan your trip to Chicago and experience the greatness that is Lollapalooza? I know I am.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Fleet Foxes

Animal Collective

Crystal Castles

Atmosphere

Andrew Bird

This is what Grant Park looked like on Friday, August 7th.

Photos via Metromix Chicago. Check out the Lollapalooza website for photos and reviews on this year’s festival as well as information about 2010’s bash!

Dear New York:

Can I please stay here forever? Why do you have to send me back to the Midwest where everyone tries to have style and then fails miserably. I don’t want to become a fashion victim..please, I’m begging you.

Sincerely,

Hillary

Photos Via the Midwasteland

“So here’s a thought. Let’s design a fairly cool looking top and then completely ruin it by throwing this metroflexible tie I found in the back of my dads closet around the models head. Oh, my god, well totally be the next Marc Jacobs!!!”  … or at least get bashed by fashionindie.

QUICKLINK: Not Fit To Be Tied

Ah the infamous girl who passes out at the concert before the second performer hits the stage. It’ quite obvious at events like this who the real party goers are. Mental notes people, by all means get your money’s worth at open bar, but be careful of the infamous snowball effect. Clearly this girl found herself at amateur hour tonight. Oh well, you’ll learn!

There are so many things wrong about this photo. The acid wash, the belly chain, the clear bra straps, the open back shirt, the overly, overly cheap, bedazzled purse. EW.

SOURCE: Miss Dior Couture

Everyone knows trends find a way of phasing themselves back in (we’ve been going through a severe 90s grunge comeback for awhile now), but there’s a few trends that we hope never make it back to life (although some of them are trying desperately, or maybe already have):

1. Thong leotards over biker shorts- Wasn’t a good look when Kelly Kapowski from Saved By The Bell did it, and isn’t even a good look for 80s parties.

2. Shutter shades- I know once Kanye was spotted in these everyone went crazy over them, but in my opinion, shutter shades were never okay, and will never, ever be okay. They serve no purpose besides making you look like a douche.

3. Visors- I have a feeling that sooner or later, hipsters are going to think that grandma visors are ‘ironic.’ I’ll just put it out there now to save everyone the $5: they aren’t ironic, they’re ugly. 

4. Mesh- so not okay. Small mesh (like the Brian Lichtenberg or American Apparel dress) = good. Big mesh = this guy.

5. Crocheted tank tops or bath suit tops as shirts- Just plain ugly.

6. Tying up dress shirts (a la ‘Hit Me Baby One More Time’)- This was cool for like, a day, but trying to be ’sexy’ while being fifteen and in catholic school is not happening.

7. One size fits all shirts- I really don’t know who thought this was a good idea. These are the ugliest shirts I’ve ever seen in my entire life.

8. Guys in flared jeans/pants- I know this actually happens. I’ve been a witness to many guys still wearing flared jeans, most of the time girls’ jeans, but occasionally True Religion will make a pair of flares.  Note to all guys: if you’re going to wear girls jeans, at least get ones that look like they could belong to a guy. And also, this is not the 70s.

9. Dark lip liner- Beyond trashy. Seriously, what the hell

10. Scrunchies- I really, really, REALLY hope this isn’t happening.

To all of the trend setters of the world, please do us a favor and stay away from reviving these, or prepare for a permanent spot in Street Zeroes.