Edited by Amanda Gabriele on
I was wondering what to even call these contraptions, so I typed “bracelet chain ring” into the Google search bar. A lovey photo came up that describes visually the horrendous crime I was trying to bust. And the Web site called it a “slave bracelet,” so I guess I’ll play along.
This fashion statement was gross and terrible. It looks like a witch who got into heavy metal, stopped showering and started reading Tarot cards to kids in trench coats at the local Gothic bar. I would almost rather wear a chain attaching my nose ring to my ear, if it meant my face wouldn’t accidentally get torn apart in the subway. Rings and bracelets are two different things; believe it or not, that’s why they’re usually separated. These are noisy when shaking hands, get caught on clothing and just look ridiculous. Halloween=Okay. Joke=Acceptable. Trying to be trendy=Leave it in the…what era was this from again??
I stole my first pair of platforms from the Spice Bus in 1997 when Anglophilia was all the rage. Collector of vintage bags, vinyl and kitchen appliances. My dream of becoming a butcher is momentarily on hiatus so I can teach you how to wear muumuus and apply false eyelashes. Follow me on Twitter @CrystlMeatballs.