Crimes of Fashion Past: Urban Camouflage

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“I saw Cady Heron wearing army pants and flip-flops, so I bought army pants and flip-flops.” That’s fine if you and Cady Heron fought in Desert Storm together, but I’m pretty sure they’re an unnecessary garment for roaming the school sans hall pass. I remember the days when my grade school classmates would haul ass to Abercrombie when the new cargo-pocketed, paper-shredded army pants hit the racks. I sat back, watched, grimaced and laughed years later when the trend ended up in the trash. Camouflage is a uniform for combat. It’s not meant to be worn by “alternative” teenagers and “cool moms” who pair it with pink Juicy Couture. I see it popping up randomly every now and then, but thank goodness the sightings are far and few between. Please good citizens, let’s keep it as a crime of fashion past.