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Marc “oh my god, I’m over 40 years old” Jacobs has just premiered a new boy toy. His name is Austin and he’s about as interesting as a lump on my right testicle. What happened to Jason?  Did he give you the HIV or something?  The reports are that this boy has recently tattoo’d Jacobs twinkified face on his ass.  I’ll believe it when I see it.

On a style note, what the fuck are your wearing Marcy?  Baby blue is not becoming and it looks like you just rolled out of bed  after an all night binger at on Easter Sunday.  Plus the sandals need to go.  No man over the age of 18 should be seen in open toed sandals.  Men’s feet are not pretty and even though you kid boyfriend can wear them, you are well above the age to ride this roller coaster. Also, what’s the deal with the chain out side of the shirt on Austin?  Did you find him at Shore Club in Jersey or was he a Growing Up Gotti reject?  Bring back Jason, he at least had some substance/easily defined dislikeability.