I was way too involved in a Twin Peaks marathon yesterday evening to even consider watching the 2011 VMAs, but curiosity got the best of me this morning after finding out Beyoncé is pregnant. Trash usually trumps triumph at any MTV event, and the red carpet stayed true to this formula at last night's show. There were some highs*, and many lows, and we're here to talk about them all in this VMA edition of Red Carpet Report Card.
*DISCLAIMER* MTV awards shows are always graded on a curve or almost everyone would be on the worst dressed list. Some of the best here (As and Bs) could have potentially been Cs at the Grammys.
Let's begin with the best, as there were only a handful of of ladies who came to work.
Selena Gomez in Julien MacDonald Fall 2011 - Congratulations Selena, for wearing a mullet dress I actually like, actually love in fact. One of our favorite teen style stars, Selena's dark side came to the surface in this Gothic number by Julien MacDonald. The gold accessories lightened things up in the perfect way.
Beyoncé in Lanvin Fall 2011 - Attention pregnant ladies all around the world: THIS is how you dress. Beyoncé could not be one ounce more beautiful in this bright orange Lanvin gown. Dripping in bling and glowing from the inside out, our admiration for the diva only grows.
Louise Roe in Tibi - Fun and summery, the very tan British TV presenter Louise Roe looked young and fresh in a jewel encrusted Tibi gown. The kohl-lined eye and beach-y hair topped off the look. Young ladies take note: you can look young and flirty while STILL keeping things sophisticated.
Zoe Saldana in Barbara Bui Fall 2011 - Simple and edgy, Zoe's look is perfect for the VMAs. A mini black dress is made complete with plunging neckline and metallic embellishment, and the snake skin heels take things up a notch. Some may call it boring, I call it polished.
Jo Calderone in Brooks Brothers - Mother Monster's greaser alter ego graced the VMAs last night in Brooks Brothers with a cigarette in one hand and a drink in the other. Badass for sure, we can always count on Lady Gaga to give all other attendees a run for their money.
Who is the one gal who straddled the thin line of best and worst dressed? Check out page 6 to find out.
Nicki Minaj in Amato Couture, among other things - I love this outfit from the waist up. The SARS mask, hair and Amato Couture corset are all spectacular and incredibly Nicki. But sister, what the hell kind of Toys 'R Us dumpster did you have to dig through for the rest?
And now, on to the worst. There are quite a few, so make sure to click through all the pages and tell us your least favorite at the end.
Kelly Rowland in Falguni & Shane Peacock Fall 2011 - This dress looks okay from far away. Then you get up close and it's like BLAM!, I broke free from the royal horse stables. There is obviously way too much going on here, but that weird feather fanny pack-esque obstruction needs to be burned first.
Britney Spears in Moschino - Oh Britney, crazy, crazy Britney. From the sequined chevron-printed jumpsuit to the leg shortening peep toe stripper shoes, this look went terribly wrong in every single way. Her discomfort on the red carpet shows through, even though we figure she's heavily medicated.
Katy Perry in Christian Dior Fall 2011 Couture - Leave it to Katy Perry to don a look from the most befuddled collection in Dior Couture history. From the weird, receding purple hairline to the kindergarten cut-and-paste outfit, this is a disaster. But girlfriend, LOVE the shoes! Where can I get me a pair?
Kim Kardashian in KaufmanFranco - Kim was tired of looking good after her legendary wedding, so she decided to be dipped in a vat of metallic silver Jell-O and call it a day for this year's VMAs. SERIOUSLY? Kim you have a bangin' body, but this dress makes you look like Flabby Fran.
Miley Cyrus in Roberto Cavalli Pre-Fall 2011 - BLECH! This is my vote for worst dressed, and you can tell in Miley's face she thinks so too. It's dresses like this that make me believe there are stylists and designers out there who want their clients to look like shit.
Who are your picks for best and worst dressed? We would love to know in the comments below.