•  
• 

So maybe you don’t have some dude or dudette picking out flowers for you today. Maybe there isn’t going to be a half-nakey chica waiting for you in a teddy when you get home from work. And maybe you won’t end the night in your loved ones arms as they whisper sweet somethings into your ear as you drift away. Hell, Indies I know that sounds bad, but it could be worse, allot worse.

1. You could be dating one of the scary @ss male models that hit the runway this season. Manorexia is so not hot and who wants a boyfriend who will steal your jeans. Does anyone date these boyish beings? And why is that dude biting his cheeks so hard?

2. You could be this couple. Has no one dropped him a hint that she might be packing a little something extra under her Baby Phat?

3. You could be either of these two on Valentines day. It’s bad enough that you’re, how do I put this softly, oh yeah, a complete trainwreck in the face, body and personality department, but do you really need to dress badly as well. Mr. Mickey (Paper Magazine) obviously made this sweater himself, possibly the result of the past ten years he’s spent alone at home, and Lauren Ezersky most likely killed a Pomeranian to make that hat. For shame fashion “icons”, for shame.

4. You could be a 25 year old nobody who’s only claim to fame is the fact that you date a 40+ year old world famous designer. (Actually, that doesn’t sound too bad. Kimora I’m ready and willing if you are)