Britney Spears is all set to live down the disaster that was Crossroads with an appearance in Sex and the City 2, y’all. I’m secretly excited, but only cause she’s risen so high since the breakdown that a relapse is undoubtedly eminent. $5 bucks it happens a week before the premiere.

Not that I think Britney’s been looking too hot lately, but her makeup artist is offering up some helpful tips; guess it can’t hurt to listen. Lesson one in Brits beauty diary: Aluminum foil. Spears’ makeup artist freezes the foil and applies it to the lips to reduce swelling. Never heard of it before, but I guess if it gives you a fresh pucker you can’t loose.

LINKAGE: Allure

So Lady Gaga was recently spotted wearing a Britney Spearsesque look and now it seems that the Princess of Pop it ready for a style wars throwdown.

A source tells Star: “On the one hand, Britney appreciates that GaGa is so into her look because it shows she respects her, but Britney worries that GaGa is encroaching on her territory…As long as it doesn’t completely steal her thunder, she’s OK with it.”

I honestly don’t think the two are that similar. Britney would never kill a muppet in the name of fashion and she would definitely never be caught dead in whatever the fluck this is…

QUICKLINK: Britney Spears worried that Lady GaGa is stealing her look

Everyone knows trends find a way of phasing themselves back in (we’ve been going through a severe 90s grunge comeback for awhile now), but there’s a few trends that we hope never make it back to life (although some of them are trying desperately, or maybe already have):

1. Thong leotards over biker shorts- Wasn’t a good look when Kelly Kapowski from Saved By The Bell did it, and isn’t even a good look for 80s parties.

2. Shutter shades- I know once Kanye was spotted in these everyone went crazy over them, but in my opinion, shutter shades were never okay, and will never, ever be okay. They serve no purpose besides making you look like a douche.

3. Visors- I have a feeling that sooner or later, hipsters are going to think that grandma visors are ‘ironic.’ I’ll just put it out there now to save everyone the $5: they aren’t ironic, they’re ugly. 

4. Mesh- so not okay. Small mesh (like the Brian Lichtenberg or American Apparel dress) = good. Big mesh = this guy.

5. Crocheted tank tops or bath suit tops as shirts- Just plain ugly.

6. Tying up dress shirts (a la ‘Hit Me Baby One More Time’)- This was cool for like, a day, but trying to be ’sexy’ while being fifteen and in catholic school is not happening.

7. One size fits all shirts- I really don’t know who thought this was a good idea. These are the ugliest shirts I’ve ever seen in my entire life.

8. Guys in flared jeans/pants- I know this actually happens. I’ve been a witness to many guys still wearing flared jeans, most of the time girls’ jeans, but occasionally True Religion will make a pair of flares.  Note to all guys: if you’re going to wear girls jeans, at least get ones that look like they could belong to a guy. And also, this is not the 70s.

9. Dark lip liner- Beyond trashy. Seriously, what the hell

10. Scrunchies- I really, really, REALLY hope this isn’t happening.

To all of the trend setters of the world, please do us a favor and stay away from reviving these, or prepare for a permanent spot in Street Zeroes.

Here is a first look at Britney Spears new Candie’s commercial.

Poor Mischa Barton, it’s been a rough week for her. First she goes insane a la Britney, then gets bashed by the director of her new movie Homecoming for missing the premier, and now she’s being replaced! The filming schedule for A Beautiful Life has already been pushed back because of her so-called meltdown and now the CW is hiring another actress who will be similar in her “features and personality”! A little harsh if you ask us, poor girl was probably just trying to get a little publicity for her show! 

SOURCE: Perez Hilton

Britney’s back with more makeup and bleach than ever. Glad to see she’s continuing on the clean up her life path.

SOURCE: Perez Hilton

Camel Toe has once again reared it’s ugly face, this time attacking the likes of Britney Spears, Sharon Stone, Rihanna, Beyonce and many, many more. Click Here to view 24 of the worst celebrity cameltoes on CultIndie.com.

The NY Post is reporting — according to one of those great, anonymous, yet somehow reliable sources — that during a recent photoshoot for ELLE, Britney Spears made quite an impression on her stylist.

“They dressed her in all these beautiful couture clothes — and, well, let’s just say she forgot what time of the month it was. It wasn’t pretty.”

Mm…Happy Friday!

• Rihanna’s cancels concert. [Neon Limelight]

• Ciara’s duets with Chris Brown. [Rolling Stone]
• Madonna can’t have a baby[Reuters]
• The 3 year old baby’s 15 year old father speaks out against Madonna. [E!]
• Britney Spears. TERRIFIED. [Perez Hilton]
• Pink “if I were gay, do you really think I would have a problem coming out?” [Perez Hilton]
• Beyonce’s “somebody’s getting fired.” [Perez Hilton]
• Roman Polanski. No longer a sex offender?!? [AP]
• Janet Jackson tittie is still making news. [L.A. Times]
• Amy Winehouse gets down with a mystery man. [The Daily Mail]
• According to Cloney, Rande Gerber didn’t fondle anyone. [TMZ]
• Nicolas Cage movie is causing causalties. [TMZ]
• “He almost lost it completely on The Soloist, so it’s little wonder he went nuts on Miley like that. I mean, people just don’t know how close to the edge he really was.” a “friend” on Jamie Foxx [E!]
• Robert Duvall against Walmart. [AP]
• Octomom gets sued. [TMZ]
• They tried to make him go to rehab but he said no, no, no says Dennis Rodman’s rep. [E!]
• Jennifer Hudson is taking a break. [E!]
• Twilight and Slumdog Millionaire lead the MTV Movie Award nominations. Weird. [People]
• Diddy and Russell Brand hang out in Las Vegas. [RussellBrand.tv]
• Holly hearts Russell. “Russell and Holly were flirting with each other all night,” a source says. [E!]
• Paula Abdul releases something. [L.A. Times]
• Jessica Alba says her 11 month old daughter Honor Marie is “covered in lots of drool.” [People]
• Eminem = 20 Vicodin, Ambien, and Valium a day.  [People]
• Alexis Bledel says she is interested in doing a film in Spanish. [Wall Street Journal]
• Margaret Cho said, “I don’t think of her as plus-size. I just think of her as beautiful. I think people are going to fall in love with Brooke and the character Jane and realize that beauty comes in all sizes. That’s something we are trying to promote with the show. The idea of being plus-size is somewhat ridiculous, because most women are. I mean, I am, and most women are.” [CNN]
• “Probably the sexiest woman I know is my mother. She’s an ethereal angel. Nobody looks like that woman. If I could meet my mother and marry her, I would. I would be with my mother now, if she weren’t my mother, as sick as that sounds.” – Shia LaBeouf is a momma’s boy. [Star]

LINKAGE: Rihanna Cancels “Comeback” Concert; Madonna’s Adoption Case Adjourned Indefinitely [Dirt Bag (After Dark)]

At an Anaheim concert last week, Britney Spears took the Hokey-Pokey a bit too seriously and started shaking her tampon string all about. I’m sure this isn’t the only time a celebrity has let the string fly free, but by now, I feel like wardrobe would have this taken care of. Oh well, at least we know she’s not pregnant…and how lucky that unborn embryo is…

Thanks The Superficial!

You have to give it to the Scot. She cleans up quite nicely. Can’t wait until her next performance on that talent show that isn’t American Idol. Weigh in indies, love the look or hate it?

LINKAGE: Susan Boyle got a makeover

As if this portion of Britney Spears’ circus tour weren’t enough, a little wardrobe malfunction surly adds to the awkwardness. Some strange dominatrix man drops from the ceiling, dry humps Britney for a second, turns their two bodies into a giant human pretzel, all while ripping out one of the pop diva’s hair extensions. If you think that sounds painful, try watching it.

Leighton Meester has signed with Universal Republic Records for a fall album, and will be collaborating with American Idol’s Kara DioGuardi and JR Rotem, who’s worked with Britney Spears, for an album that will “favor an electro-pop edge.”

An Australian tee company called B.Bot Defence Systems Inc. has come up with designs mixing the best of pop and street culture with an obvious obsession of  robots (Britney Spears, Supreme, the Jumpman logo, and the Transformers). 

Currently addicted to Topsy Turvy hats. The “Be Mine” is so classic and the circus inspired ringleader hats have Britney Spears comeback tour written all over them. I’m currently buying one for Becks. I have a couple fantasies these head toppers might help out with. Grab the whip.

The gorgeous face of Lily Donaldson, the genius photography of Partick Demarchelier and the avant garde styling of Carine Roitfeld. The three may be perfect in themselves, but add a little Britney Spears, post baby, to the mix and you’ve got one hilariously captivating spread. Though the action in the photos is, by far, more enticing than the fashion itself, spreads like this certainly qualify why Vogue Paris blows American Vogue out of the water. At least someone isn’t afraid to step outside the box…and bring light to bad parenting. 

Thanks Fashion Copious! 

The official ‘If you seek Amy’ (aka Fuck Me) video has been released. Let us know your thoughts…

LINKAGE: Dlisted