If there’s anything that separates a celebrity from the proletariat, its his or her ability to turn on the megawatt smile at the mere suggestion of a flash bulb. Artist Stuart Pearson Wright has built a small exhibition of portraits around the idea of capturing this  automated response and the ensuing awkwardness and ambiguity that results in simply asking people to say cheese.

With a lick of faux-Hollywood gloss about them, his subjects are grinning and bearing it in a kind of toothsome, medicated trance which horribly reminds me of Britney Spears, mid-breakdown. Wright’s female subjects are all tits, teeth and blow-dried hair so its a relief to move on to his smaller exhibition of tattoo portraits, where people seem much happier, you know, just getting their tats out. Wright selected subjects according to old school stereotypes; the circus strongman, the tattooed lady, the side-show freak…And they seem much more content than the freaks in frames on the opposite wall.But on the way out of the gallery, you have to pass those weird rictus grins again, with their airbrushed FUN TIMES smiles and surfaces dusted with real diamonds. It’s like we can’t believe anyone’s having a good time until we see it plastered all over their face and we’ve photographed it, tagged it, shared it, liked it… Or, as Wright put is; “the collective, hysterical conspiracy to appear happy which blights our visual world with endless images of disingenuousness.” Basically the same thing, yeh? Stuart Pearson Wright is on show at the Riflemaker, London until February 15.

Head over to LOOKBOOKS to see the original story.

- Diane von Furstenberg thinks Bernard Arnault should throw his $41-billion weight around and step in to solve the ongoing skirmish over the fashion week calendar. [WSJ]

Photo: People

- Britney Spears‘ fiance, Justin Trawick apparently told jeweler Neil Lane he “didn’t want an over-the-top ring with a giant stone.” So Lane instead opted for subtlety and nothing says subtlety like 90 small diamonds around a big — but not giant — diamond. [People]

- Between Lanvin Petite‘s $1570 trenches and Young Versace‘s new boutique featuring a merry-go-round, kids are hitting the runway before hitting the playground. [WWD, WWD]

- Someone clearly lost a finger over this appearance on Anderson Cooper‘s talk show. No one makes Madonna sound like two obese gimps going at it in a pool of hot wax and gets away with it. [Styleite]

- Some people are real assholes during the holidays. [Racked]

- And some people are surprisingly amazing. [Jezebel]

- Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi is getting the Juicy Couture sweatpants sued right off of her. The pocket-guidette filed suit to end her contract with licensing company, SRG Ventures in October. SRG has now countered with their own suit to the tune of $7 million, but jokes on them: all of Snooki’s assets are tied up in Valtrex stock and deep-fried pickle bonds. [NY Post]

The idea was that of madame editrix, Anna Wintour, who is secretly hilarious — in that incredibly dry and mocking British way:

I had to read the e-mail from the editor in chief several times to be quite sure. There, buried like a time bomb in a bouquet, was this chilling sentence: “I have signed you up to compete in The X Factor…You can sing,” says Anna…”This will be easy for you.” Her enthusiasm buoys me along, until a moment over dinner at the Metropolitan Opera…when she insouciantly announces that she is, in fact, completely tone deaf.  

Months of vocal training along with a word or two of advice from Liza Miinnelli :

“Just kinda talk through it and then sing the last bit real pretty, so that’s what they’ll remember,” she counseled, doing just that by way of example. “And remember to sing every song as if it’s the last time you are ever going to sing it!”*

And Bowles traveled to Newark, NJ — which was surprisingly the biggest indignity of the entire production — to take the stage.

Under the guise of Leo Mercuré (a character from a Noël Coward play, natch) — a  hairdresser who “once gave Anna Wintour a blow-out” —  Bowles crooned out a “hip-swinging” rendition of  Britney Spears‘ classic ode to lost innocence, “Oops!…I Did It Again” to the delight of the judges and a studio audience of 4,000 vultures.

Sadly, Bowles did not make it to the next stage of competition, but he was at least spared Cowell’s trademark brutality and Paula Abdul even said she wanted to hang out with him. And really, isn’t the prospect of doing karaoke with that glorious train-wreck to “Opposites Attract” reward enough? [Vogue]

*Which for Liza, it very well may be.

NAME: Jo Calderone

CLASSIFICATION: Human Italian male

PERSONALITY: Pissed off. Handsy. Asshole. Just like the last one.

DISTINGUISHING CHARACTERISTICS: Jutted jaw. Brooklyn accent. Dirty t-shirt or tuxedo. Greaser.

MOMENT(S) OF GLORY: VMA 2011 performance. You and I music video cameo. Cover of Vogue Japan.

LOW POINT(S): Denied a makeout sesh with Britney Spears. Not a girl, not yet a woman…

*DISCLAIMER* MTV awards shows are always graded on a curve or almost everyone would be on the worst dressed list. Some of the best here (As and Bs) could have potentially been Cs at the Grammys.

Let’s begin with the best, as there were only a handful of of ladies who came to work.

Selena Gomez in Julien MacDonald Fall 2011 – Congratulations Selena, for wearing a mullet dress I actually like, actually love in fact. One of our favorite teen style stars, Selena’s dark side came to the surface in this Gothic number by Julien MacDonald. The gold accessories lightened things up in the perfect way.

“Justin and Selena as One”

Someday is on track to become the number one selling ladyjuice of 2011. Karen Grant of market research group, NPD, even has the audactiy to liken it to other diva-fronted fragrances, claiming:

“We haven’t seen anything like it since [Jennifer Lopez’s] Glow and [Britney Spears’] Curious.”

Bieber also sacrilegiously broke Macy’s‘ previous celebrity scent sales record set by Beyoncé in February 2010 for Heat by finishing one week ahead at the $3 mil mark.

Ouch, B. Who run the world now? Biebs. [WWD]

The exhibit opens today June 7th at famed British jeweler Stephen Webster in Beverly Hills.  Proceeds from “In Case of Fashion Emergency Break Glass,” in addition to 10% of jewelry sales for the month of June, will be donated to the Prince’s Trust.

The Prince’s Trust is a cause especially close to Thomas’s heart. Having left his native Glouchester where he was studying as a plumber’s apprentice, Thomas found himself in London at age nineteen with only 30 pounds to his name. There he became immersed in the nightlife scene in hopes of meeting his idol, Boy George. He soon realized, however, he couldn’t get by with just being fabulous; he actually had to do something. The life of a fashion editor appealed to him so at 22 he applied for a grant from the Prince’s Trust.

With the money he won, David put together a portfolio and wrote over 100 stylists, hoping to work for free as an assistant. He supported himself with a job handing out roses and perfume in a bathroom of a club at night and washing dishes at a café on the weekends. He was eventually hired by Isabella Blow and Judy Blaine; the latter, as fate would have it, was Boy George’s stylist. After scoring a lucky break styling Lisa Stansfield‘s video for “All Around the World,” Thomas took over working with Boy George from Blaine, who had become too busy with another client, Neneh Cherry.

By 24, David Thomas had become the fashion editor at Esquire, the youngest editor in the world at that time. He befriended Hamish Bowles, who was working at Harper’s & Queen in the office next door. Bowles took Thomas under his refined wing and taught him the ins and outs of proper decorum. Thomas also met a young Philip Treacy from whom he commissioned a hat for Boy George, thus helping launch his impressive career as a milliner.

David Thomas plans to document his 23-plus years in fashion with a book he’s currently working on, but for “In Case of Fashion Emergency,” he didn’t want to delve too deep into the past. Rather, he wanted to focus on the last six months to make the exhibit more relevant. He will be featuring looks he styled for Britney Spears, Chris Brown, Matthew McConaughey, Avril Lavigne, Chris Hemsworth, John Legend and of course Puff Daddy, by whom the exhibit’s name is more or less inspired.

While having dinner one Saturday night, Puff called him, desperately in need of an outfit for dinner with Jay Z — an age-old dilemma. David rushed home, but impeded by traffic, got there an hour later, at which point Puff had already solved the problem. He later joked with friends that he should always have a back-up outfit, encased in a glass box like a fire extinguisher, and  in case of fashion emergencies, he would simply break the glass.

If you’re in Beverly Hills tonight or at all during the month of June — the length of the exhibit —  make sure to drop by Stephen Webster so you too can be prepared for your own fashion emergencies. Although, I doubt Puff Daddy will be calling you anytime soon, as David Thomas would tell you, it’s best to be prepared.

1. Booze. Let’s be real, if shit’s going down tomorrow, I’m going out in a vodka-soaked blaze of glory.

2. At least one piece of McQueen’s Savage Beauty. Yes I am breaking into The Met and yes I am wearing this gold duck feather coat out.

3. Egoïste. Because I need to see a Louis Vuitton-attired polar bear taking in an Al Gore lecture on global warming before I die. That happened.

4. These post-Apocalyptic video looks from Beyoncé’s “Run the World (Girls)”:

Photo: NY Mag

And Lady Gaga‘s “Judas”:

Photo: Nicola Formichetti's Blog!!

5. Oprah. I know this is short notice with the world ending tomorrow and all, but I really think Oprah and I should be together since I’ve recently adopted her as my mother. She’s not really aware of it.

6. Violent Lips. Sometimes a girl needs to look fierce and really this isn’t the time to slack off with boring old jungle red or whatever signature color you use. Give me a hot pink leopard lip and call it a day/year/life.

7. Made in Brazil #3.

Boom:

Photo: Models.com

Nuff said.

8. Angelina Jolie’s Atelier Versace gown from Cannes. I love a good statement-making gown when the skies open up; and this gown will say, “Excuse me, stop what you’re doing. I get it…but I’m in the room.”

9. A pair of Louboutins I lifted from FI‘s Editor-in-Chief Sam Lim. Barring the fact that I’m about six shoe sizes bigger than she is, Sam’s long hours in the line at the Christian Louboutin sample sale should be celebrated. Celebrated with a unbearably painful walk-off.

10. Fashion Indie’s Mixtape Vol. 3. If we’re all still here next week you can get a listen for yourself, but I’ve already got my copy and will be dancing till the world ends.

Speaking of Britney, I forgot to include drugs — last minute shopping …literally!

On how being a mom affected how she approaches her career: “I think things through a little bit more, and I worry a lot. I’m more straightforward, and I speak up more than I did before. When I was younger, I wouldn’t speak up as much, but now that I’m a mom, things have changed.”

What don’t people know about you? “I’m pretty normal, you know? Like I said, the type of day I love is just like everybody else’s. I’m like everybody else.”

For more photos and the full story, go to http://www.harpersbazaar.com/britney.

We love Britney and can’t stop listening to her new album in the office. Are you going to get tickets for her upcoming tour?

- After marrying David Lauren, son of iconic American designer Ralph Lauren, Lauren Bush will unfortunately not be known as Lauren Lauren. [Harper's Bazaar]

- A new documentary delves into the 50 year relationship between Yves Saint Laurent and his partner Pierre Bergé, told through the objects they collected together. Despite not believing in the souls of the objects — let alone of other people — Bergé remains sentimental like any old glorious queen…by selling them off. [NYT]

- 3 months after having a baby, Miranda Kerr is back in a bikini for Have Faith Swimwear. Yeah, I’d put down that pot brownie if I were you….

- Libelula, Sophie Cranston‘s label that allegedly designed Kate Middleton‘s wedding dress, has released an official denial, thus perpetuating the greatest mystery of our times. [WWD]

- Thierry Mugler, the man behind the Mugler magic, is now going by the name of Manfred these days and is serving as the artistic director for drag queen, Joey Arias. Meanwhile, his eponymous label is working with another famed drag queen, Lady Gaga. [Style.com]

- The VERY 90s black sports bra and white sweatpant Britney Spears wore for a Japanese commercial years ago when she still had her soul are being auctioned off to benefit Japan. [The Cut]

Celebrities and Fashion have always been synonymous. However, today more than ever, fashion magazines are featuring more celebrities than immigrants trying to get into the USA for their Green Card. In many cases these highly regarded magazines are using celebrities more often than Super Models for their covers. There are many reasons for this and in my opinion some of those decisions have more to do with the Politics of Fashion than the notoriety of the Celebrity.

Why is it that some of the Biggy Fashion Mags don’t feature Super Models, but do feature Celebrities from all sectors of the Entertainment Industry?  I believe that it is because they can’t get the Super Models for their magazines. In fact their are very few magazines that can get Super Models and find it a lot easier to get Celebrities to adorn the covers of their ELLE’s, Marie Claire’s etc…

It is true that Celebs sell and can attract a large audience, but when it comes to the giants vying for THAT Top Model, that is where only a few of the Biggies like VOGUE, Harper’s BAZAAR, ELLE and a few other more obscure, but none the less important magazines like Numéro, V and perhaps L’Officiel can get on occasion.

Of course many would argue that the reason that this or that fashion magazine are shooting Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears or Paris Hilton is because they sell magazines. That may be true, but I am quite sure that if all of the major and lesser influential fashion magazines attempted to compete for the creme de la creme of the modelling industry and could only get models and not celebrities, that the King of the heap would surface really quickly. You would see immediately by the standard of the models acquired who really rules the game.

Thus again the reason why Celebs act as a great draw that diverts the attention from the obvious omission from the covers of “Fashion” Magazines of Top Models. Why would a major fashion magazine want to be judged by their peers and the public based on the fact that so and so was on this magazines cover but not on theirs? Celebs are a kind of “Hey we have Paris on our cover wearing Gucci” and not “Hey we could only get so and so and so and so competitor Fashion magazine knows that we could only get so and so because of you know why…”

I am not saying that celebrities should not be on magazine covers. I am saying that a Fashion magazine should be a Fashion Magazine and not a people magazine. Models are part of the Fashion landscape and I am hoping that we can get back to the epoch where fashion magazines did what they did and did it well and leave the people’s magazines to People Magazine.

And lastly, celebrities seem to be more accessible than agents representing those models most of the fashion magazines would love to get on their covers but won’t. They and their PR people understand that the exposure they garner being seen on the cover of Redbook could aid in them getting their next big part in that 2012 blockbuster “Calender’s End”*

So the next time you see the cover of a magazine with a celeb on the cover, you may want to ask yourself, “Did they because they wanted to, or because so and so didn’t want to”.

* (I made that up)

by:Benjamin Kanarek

- And in other celebrity vanity fragrance news, fembot Britney Spears is being sued by Brand Sense for allegedly cutting them out on a deal with Elizabeth Arden over Brit’s Radiance perfume. Brand Sense is seeking $10 million and I’m seeking “internet star” turned “TV star” Chris Crocker to scream through smeared eye-liner to leave that fembot alone! She’s got a tour to sleepwalk through, for Gaga‘s sake! [Radar]

- I used to think the Great Recession would never end. Then I lost interest when something shiny flew in front of my face and months later people were still on the fence about it. Well, no more! LVMH, the world’s larges luxury group, has reported some record-breaking sales and earnings for 2010. Champagne showers and gold coin baths for everyone! [WWD]

- Among other things LVMH reported, Dior is in no rush to replace John Galliano. The house, according to Bernard Arnault, the CEO of LVMH, Dior will see a number of candidates then weigh its options. In the meantime, Dior’s design studios will soldier on sans a creative director to meet the Fashion Week deadline. Riccardo Tisci must be getting the fashion equivalent of blue balls…cerulean bugle beads…?  [WWD]

If someone were to tell me I would be replacing John Galliano as the head designer for DIOR, I would not jump on the opportunity. I am once again shown the dangerous game of being on top of that mountain. You may be alone perched on the tip with hungry wolves just below waiting patiently for a chance to jump in.  Yves Saint Laurent, Calvin Klein, Alexander McQueen and now the fashion sweetheart, John Galliano, are just a few who lost their crowns.

I have been poking with a stick this fame and fortune subject for awhile. Why do we hold this insatiable desire to be branded by labels and recognized?  Consumers want it and designers want to become it.  Back in November 2009, I wrote about it for Benjamin Kanarek’s blog (link) and have not stopped thinking about it ever since. It is evident to me I no longer want to chase the carrot of fame and fortune.  Instead, the pursuit of earning a living doing what I love is my calling. Mind you, this does not eliminate the eventuality of working with the big dogs, it just releases the pressure of having to.

John Galliano followed the footsteps of so many other celebrities before him.  How he held this irrational and insurmountable pressure of producing the success of DIOR for so long is a defeat in itself.  It may have been his curse in the long run, it would have been mine. I know I would have lost the joy of designing, period. His fame and fortune was also his ball and chain. His adoring and devoted fashion harem left him as quickly as they had adopted him and this is a painful reality. The superficiality of fashion and his celebrity status hits home me. No celebrity is banned from losing their place in their profession. Britney Spears, Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen are just three among many who have had tainted their spotlight.

and last but not least my Fave… Charlie Sheen

What a f-cking fickle world we live in!

Enjoy this light chuckle by Jon Stewart.

It’s no surprise Bonnie Mckee was born and raised on the west side of America as she helped re-write “California Love” by 2Pac with a summer-y urban beat, bubbly lyrics and a cute songstress on lead vocals.

In the summer of 2010, you could not get a popsicle from an ice cream truck, check someone out at the beach or buy a pair of new Diesel denim shorts without hearing Katy Perry’s “California Gurls.”

God-forbid on behalf of the pop fans, Valley Girls and hipsters who loved the Passion Pit remix; let’s take a moment to thank Bonnie Mckee for contributing to creating Generation Z’s catchy cherry-soda-flavored California anthem.

Some might only know Bonnie for her insane pen game for pop songs but she was also a part of the 2004 Fefe Dobson/Avril Lavigne pop/rock movement, being signed to Warner’s imprint “Reprise Records.” Where is she now as a musician? Well, she is conjuring up a self-proclaimed sound that is described as something “Katy Perry’s evil twin,” would be making.

Wait like one sec? Didn’t she also write Britney Spears’s new single “Hold It Against Me” ?

Yep, she did and it is safe to say her and Lukasz wrote the majority of Spears’s seventh studio album dropping this spring. We got around to clear rumors about who she has been working with so far on her sophomore album, what it was like working with Swede-pop masterminds Bloodshy & Avant and all things Britney.

Alex Kazemi: [Laughs] I see that you re-tweeted my “Popstep” tweet about the dub-step part in “Hold It Against Me.”  Do you like that term?

Bonnie Mckee: [Laughs] Yes! You are very inventive!

Kazemi: Was there a lot of pressure when you found out you were assigned as a writer for the Britney Spears project?

Bonnie: Well, believe it or not, for the past year and half everyone and their grandmother have been writing for her project. I had been pitching songs with Britney in mind for a while. I wanted to be prepared and when I finally got the call, I was ready!  “Hold it Against Me” was actually written about a year and a half ago.

Kazemi: When you and Luke were creating the song, did you know that Urban Outfitter manufactured hipsters all over the world would be pouting on their Facebook and Twitters about “Dubstep” being used in a Britney Spears track?

Bonnie : I’m not surprised; people take their subcultures very seriously. Cry me a river hipsters!  You don’t own it! Let the world enjoy it, it was created for a reason.  Even if it’s not perfectly “true” to the genre, it’s just a fun little taste of something different!  Oh come on, Brit has to keep it fresh after all. POPSTEP!!! [Laughs]

Kazemi : [Laughs] Well, we all knew it was going to cross over at some point. I feel that  “Hold It Against Me” was a perfect way for Dubstep to be introduced to the Top 40 type of audience. I know when you were a teenager you were a misfit and went to raves, so at some point in life you must have had an experience listening to “Ministry Of Sound” and “Hed Kandi” from Europe. Did Tiesto or any house producers inspire the lyrics for the track? “You feel like paradise” and “I need a vacation tonight.”  Many of these kinds of elements are found in European tracks.

Bonnie: Actually, Katy Perry inspired the lyrics. I was working with Katy on her album and she came in one day in a little slutty dress. We all know what a bodacious figure she has… So I said to her, “Damn, Katy- If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?” A light bulb went off in my head and I was like, “I have to go!” The rest is history! [Laughs]

Kazemi: “Hold It Against Me” isn’t your only offering for the Britney sessions; I dug around Twitter and saw you were in the studio with Magnus and Bloodshy too! I nearly had a heart attack upon hearing of the Bloodshy Britney reunion.  Was it an honor working with Bloodshy & Avant ?! It’s amazing how the Swedes employ some of the best pop songs like  “Piece Of Me,” “Toxic,” and not to mention  “AM to PM” by Christina Milian! The list goes on!  He also did a Dubstep-esque track called “Freak Show” with Britney on a previous album. So maybe “Hold It Against Me” wasn’t the first?

Bonnie: Yes, working with Bloodshy was insanely fun! There must be something in the water in Sweden, because they seem to have an ear for melodies and hooks. Bloodshy, Magnus, and the whole team are so talented. They are always thinking out side of the box when it comes to writing, it was quite the honor to be working with them. Nicole Morier and I wrote a bunch of stuff together, she has done a bunch of other songs for Britney in the past. I love her! She is epic.

Kazemi: How many tracks have you done so far for Femme Fatale?

Bonnie: I’ve done six, but we are still in the process of recording, so I’m not sure how many will actually make it onto the album. Hopefully all of them! They’re so much fun! I’m very proud of the work we’ve done. I think her fans will love it.

Kazemi: Six is the magic number!  Is there anyone else you’ve been working with, other then Britney that you’re excited about?

Bonniee: Yes, I did a bunch of work with Kelly Clarkson last summer, it’s looking like that will make the album. She really has an incredible voice and I’m excited to see what happens, I have high expectations for that album!

Kazemi: ADHD moment! What inspired “Teenage Dream?” While writing, did you have any idea that it would become the album title ?

Bonnie: Katy and I have always had a mutual fascination with the adolescent state of mind. When we met six years ago we were both really into Lolita, we both explored those themes on our first records. Her song “One of the Boys” touched on the early stages of discovering that boys can be more than just friends, and my song “Confessions of a Teenage Girl” was about realizing my power as a young sexual creature and using it to my advantage. So, it was fitting that we would end up writing a song like this together. I had no idea it would go on to be the title of the album.

Kazemi: What was the song like in its rough/early stages?

Bonnie: Katy and I wrote and rewrote the song 4 times; we wanted a “forever young” type of feel. Katy started with a lyric about Peter Pan, that was cool, but it just kept feeling too young. We wanted it to have more edge, more sex. There was a version that included the line, “and the next thing you know, you’re a mom in a minivan” it kept us laughing uncontrollably for an hour. We literally wrote it beginning to end three times while rolling around the studio floor delirious.

Finally, we thought we had cracked the code. We wrote something that was based on the metaphor of “trying me on”, comparing the feeling of wearing new clothes to sex, kind of a “Dress You Up in My Love” deal. We swore we had it, then Benny Blanco came in, he was like “Uh, no.” Luke always makes us “Benny Proof” everything. He says that if Benny doesn’t get it, America won’t get it.

Katy and I looked at each other in dismay, knowing we would have to start all over again. He said, “something more like this” and played us The Teenagers “Homecoming”, but at that point we were so over it, we just called it a night. The next week Katy invited me to Santa Barbara to write with her, Doctor Luke, and Max Martin. I really wanted to bring my best, so I took it home and sat with it. I thought about my adolescent years, my first love. I thought about watching Baz Luhrmann’s “Romeo and Juliet”, putting on a mini disco ball, and just dreaming of Leo. I thought about my friends and I having slumber parties in the 90’s, giddy at the mere THOUGHT of boys, a time when love and sex only existed in magical stories and movies. I thought about what Benny had said, I listened to the song again. The Teenagers, what a great word, teenager! A powerful word; our entire adolescence condensed into just three syllables.

That’s what songwriters are always looking for – powerful yet familiar themes, and there it was. I couldn’t believe after all of our agonizing over “youth” themes, that we had overlooked such an obvious one- the teenage condition. That night I had to leave for Santa Barbara and with that single word under my belt, I was confident I could piece it together from there. I was texting myself rhyme schemes all the way up PCH, trying to unscramble the puzzle before I walked into that studio. When I arrived, I was so excited to tell Doctor Luke about how I’d finally cracked the code, but he was pissed, we had so much time on the chorus alone that and banned us from spending another second on it, so I bit my tongue. We went immediately began working on the verses. Katy had already mapped out some beautiful images; building forts out of tents, running away and never looking back, etc. From that we wove a beautiful story together. I’m really excited how the video turned out because it’s exactly what we spoke of when writing it. Finally she went in to lay down vocals, I was freaking out that I wasn’t able to reveal my “Teenage Dream” version yet, and it wasn’t until she had recorded the whole thing that I pulled Luke and Max aside and told them about my idea. When I sang it to them they said “Well why didn’t you say that in the first place?!” I had tried! Anyway, we re-cut the chorus and Katy was much happier with it. That was the most important thing to me. The “Skin tight jeans” line in the bridge was a scrap that came from our “Try me on” version, it happened to rhyme with Teenage Dream, so I guess it wasn’t a complete waste of time!

When we listened to the play back we were all so pumped that it had paid off. I remember Max sitting back and saying, “I wish we could bottle this feeling”. It was really magical.

Kazemi: The youth inspiration clearly came out to be a success! This may be difficult, but do you have a favorite track on the record that you wrote?

Bonnie::  Teenage Dream. California Gurls is amazing too though, Katy was brilliant to bring that title back and spin it the way she did. We had a lot of fun thinking up 90’s themed lyrics for that one, the gin and juice line was a must and the Jeep line was pretty funny. Jeeps are SOO 90’s!! Haha! When I heard Snoop was on the song, I could have died. It was a dream come true- Teenage Dream comes true! Literally! Haha.  TGIF is pretty much a word for word description of our trip to Santa Barbara, so I love that one. It’s really kitschy, fun, and fills me with nostalgia. Another song I wrote, “Part of Me”. That one is beautiful. Katy sings with so much emotion and when I heard the chorus for the first time it gave me chills. It is a very real and raw song. I didn’t write on ET but I wish I did. That is my fav besides Teenage dream. But Teenage Dream is my ultimate because it felt extremely personal to me. I feel like I contributed to it the most of the four songs I worked on with and I seriously wanted to cry when I heard it was the album title.  I had so much fun working with Katy, Luke and Max. We make a great team! Who knows? You might just hear some more from us on my own upcoming album…

Kazemi: Enough about Britney and everyone else!! Rumors are circulating that Dr. Luke will be producing your sophomore follow-up from 2004’s debut  “Trouble.” You obviously have grown as an artist, 7 years later and you kind of already covered the youthful stuff on Trouble and expressed the rest of ideas on “Teenage Dream.” How does it differ when you are writing for yourself and for another artist?

Bonnie: The rumors are true; Dr. Luke and I are just starting to put together ideas for my second album. I think the main difference in writing for myself versus other artist is that lyrically, I take more chances. I’ve learned through my time in the songwriting trenches, that when I write something ballsy, a lot of the labels will be like “Oh, so-and-so would never say that” or “It’s too smart”. I tend to simplify and sweeten a majority of the things I write for other people, I like to take risk on my own stuff, go a little bit ‘left field’.

Kazemi: You have credits for all the music and lyrics on your debut album “Somebody.” That is quite impressive, you must be meticulous, a perfectionist, or have some type of OCD! [Laughs]

Bonnie: Funny you should say that, my whole life I was kind of a fuck up and everyone thought I’d never amount to anything. Now I am so driven and a total workaholic!! I was obsessed with writing every word and every note, which is impressive I suppose, but it didn’t do me much good, did it? I’ve learned that two heads are better than one and now I love to collaborate. I’m proud that I created a piece of art that came completely from myself, I now prefer working with others to get out of my head a bit.

Kazemi: So for your sophomore album, is Luke the only producer who’s signed up so far? You’ve worked with Ke$ha in the past, do you think she will grab the pen for your record too? Have you been working on material for it yet?

Bonnie: I will be working with Dr Luke, Max Martin, Greg Kurstin, Josh Abraham, and Oliver Goldstein, who is my main collaborator. He is kind of my musical soul mate because he can do so much; he can do the really hard electronic stuff and then can sit down and create something beautiful on live instruments. He’s my favorite producer right now. I would love to collaborate with Ke$ha on this project, and Katy as well, I have a top-secret plan for us… She doesn’t know it yet though!  [Laughs] I actually have bazillion songs I’ve written; it’s just about narrowing it down to one cohesive sound. I will probably just start from scratch and write all new stuff.

Kazemi: What kind of pop sound are you going for? The first album wasn’t your typical pop record; it had more of an acoustic sound but was still radio friendly. People have said that you are going to be the next Katy Perry, I feel like that is just a generalized statement considering you have worked together. Will your sound be anything different then what we’ve heard lately? It would be nice to hear you contribute to the pop revolution everyone is raving about; we still haven’t heard it yet.

Bonnie: I take being the “next Katy Perry” as a compliment, because I really love her work. But I will probably be more like Katy Perry’s evil twin. It will have the poptastic dance-ability but with more of an edge. I want to borrow from some of the eighties glory… big, anthemic sing along songs with crazy modern production. I am also toying with the idea of changing my name for this project, since I’ve kind of already done “Bonnie Mckee.” I’m interested in reemerging with a completely new identity, sound, and perspective. So don’t freak out, if my Twitter name change! I can’t wait to get on stage again!  It’s going to be fresh, fun, and ballsy!

LINKLOVE:  ALEX KAZEMI

It isn’t apparent that Ke$ha wrote Britney’s second single off seventh studio album Femme Fatale, which is a very good thing.

So good in fact, that Ke$ha should just halt her career as a singer and join Dr. Luke’s camp as a song-writer since she seems to put much more effort into the careers of others than her own.   Britney has always been known for implementing fun slang and quotable lyrics. This time around “If you want this good ish/ Sicker than the remix ,” fits in very well with today’s culture.  Thank you, Ke$ha.  The verses and hook show off an impressive never-before-heard vocal delivery until it gets drowned in a chopped and screwed chorus that really just concludes the chopped-and-screwed thing is getting as played out as dubstep. But it’s fine… She redeems herself with an infectious Middle 8 over a classic Britney sugar-coated dance beat you just can’t deny.  Voila, power-pop anthem. “Till The World Ends,” is going to smash parties all around the galaxy. “WOAH OH-OH-OH-OH- AHHHH…”

LINKLOVE: ALEX KAZEMI

It’s not every day that Bloodshy & Avant birth a teen pop star. In comes Sky Ferreira, almost too good to be true. Eh?

Bloodshy is back in the studio? What! He’s working with an 18-year-old girl out of Los Angeles? Huh? Baby Britney Spears is that you?! The blogosphere nearly had a mental breakdown when the news got out and everyone’s expectations raised sky high (no pun intended).  Klas Åhlund? Bloodshy & Avant? Five track EP?  Is this really happening? I would like to call her the underground pop revolutionist.

The AS IF! EP shows off nothing but sass, character and imagination. Whether Sky is channelling different gimmicks/egos during these songs is undetermined. However, it’s safe to say every song has its own personality and story to tell.

The first single, “Sex Rules” is an 80s’ themed floor-filler with witty lyrics that sum up a teen point of view on sex, although it isn’t a proper representation of the rest of the exotic pop songs on this EP. The electro/pop ballad “Traces” starts off in an honest fashion; Ferreira confessing and loathing about a boy who left stains in her bed. Colin Munroe’s production harbours an eerie ambiance with a dubstep-tinged chorus and melancholy piano based verses. “Haters Anonymous” could be one of the weirdest genuinely cool pop songs you’ve heard in the last 5 years. The song’s concept revolves around social commentary and the Internet generation; primarily the way we are able to rapidly comment and post foolish things without thinking twice. Bloodshy’s pet robot that makes appearances in almost every Kylie/Britney song splashes out a “Whatever!” like Cher Horowitz from Clueless in Tron shtick. “The Slander Machine kicks in full gear,” before a toned down but huge pop chorus. By the end of the song, every listener should conjure images of html codes, computers crashing and neon lights. “99 Tears” sounds like it could’ve been on Kylie Minogue’s X album. A cute reference to Johnny Depp cult classic, Cry Baby comes off to be completely necessary in a pop song or maybe she is just talking about a boy who cried wolf. Sky’s shiny vocals demanding a boy to “Drown in 99 Tears,” over a beaming Greg Kurstin beat is basically pop perfection. “108” concludes things in a strange way; the Teddybears utilized beat sounds like something that would be played in a robot graveyard in Sweden. “My Secret lover is 108/ I know it sounds insane, it’s really ok,” could be a play on teen girls dating older men or about an imaginary lover.

AS IF! Is as fun as the movie it was named after and is a must have for fans of Britney Spears’ Blackout

AS IF!— a digital EP that will be available from all digital retailers beginning March 22nd. The lead-off track, “Sex Rules,” is currently for sale on iTunes.

LINK LOVE: ALEX KAZEMI

V Magazine’s Spring issue is also labeled the “Star Power Issue” and it makes sense that Britney is the cover girl. Her star power has been going strong for a decade. She makes it know that “The bitch is back and better than ever” as she is quoted on the tri-fold cover. Famed  photographer Mario Testino captures the Britney we all know and love in Britney Forever. If the shots are any inkling to what Femme Fatale is going t sound like then we are in for a treat.

Credit: Celeb For Free

1. Never wear a black bra under a white top…EVER. Well, maybe if you’re Madonna or Lady Gaga.

2. The right amount of cleavage is a very sexy thing. What’s not sexy is when too much breast tissue billows out of the top making it seem like you’re wearing a bra that’s three sizes too small.

Credit: Red Carpet Victim

3. Slippery straps are a fashion no-no. They make you look sloppy and unkempt and are a clear indication that you’re bra is not working out for you.

Credit: Fabulous After 40

4. Don’t forget about gravity. Wearing a bra is not just a matter of appropriateness it’s a necessity. After babies, a little weight gain and general aging, your breasts are simply not what they used to be.

5. You’ve got some very special back bulge. We’re not talking about those few extra pounds gained over the dreary winter…if there is a build-up of tissue around the underarms or below your bra band, your body is screaming for a proper fitting. We’re also confident that you’re seriously uncomfortable.

Credit: Figleaves.com

6. If nude isn’t an option in your undergarment drawer, you’re committing fashion atrocities left and right. Nude is the color to wear under just about everything. You should not see the outline of your bra through your top – unless you’re wearing something sheer.

7. Your summer style means that just about everyone knows what color bra you’re wearing. It’s the age-old dilemma when wearing low necklines or tank tops: how to hide the top of your bra? You can try layering or double-sided fashion tape, which is a woman’s style essential. Another option is to go for a bandeau, balconette or demi bra.

Credit: Wayne Tippetts

8. Matching the correct style of bra with your outfit. If you’re wearing a halter top or an evening dress with off the shoulder sleeves, you’ll need a corresponding bra so that the only focus is on that fabulous ensemble you’re wearing.

Credit: The Gloss

9. You only have two breasts. So if for some reason someone is seeing four, that’s a major concern. Generally it means that your bra is way tight and it’s pushing your breast tissue upwards creating the illusion that you’re rocking a side-show act.

Credit: Figleaves.com

10. Stay smooth by embracing the new lace. Let’s face it – while t-shirt and contouring bras have the smoothness we need, they may lack the sexiness we desire. Sometimes lace can be a bit bulky under clingy fabrics, but many of the new three-part cup and cut and sew bras provide optimal coverage with flirty appeal. A bonus: the extra seam on these bras helps with controlling and centering breast tissue.

Photo: Jamie Squire/Getty Images

-This is what an Oscar looks like. [Movieline]

- Christina Aguilera is really earning her diva stripes. After her now infamous (and perhaps drunken) “reaming” of “The Star-Spangled Banner” at the Super Bowl, in addition to her divorce, flop album, flop film, and noticeable bloat, she’ll have to pull off a comeback of Spearsian proportions. (Though, let’s be real, Britney is totally phoning it in at this point.) [Gawker]

-Lea T. is getting ready to make her “O” face. She’ll be bringing her story to the greatest network ever created, OWN, The Oprah Winfrey Network. Go. Head. Tranny. [Models.com]

- Prince booted Kim Kardashian‘s booty off his stage after she didn’t shake what Kris Jenner gave her hard enough. [EW]

- Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen man up. [Refinery29]

- Rich bride, poor bride, tacky bride who probably shouldn’t be getting married after all. Introducing wedding dresses by Urban Outfitters! Just file the divorce papers now. [WWD]

- PETA further endears itself to absolutely no one with plans to “blast [Donna] Karan’s offices with the sound of screaming rabbits.” [New York Observer]

1. Workin’ It!: RuPaul’s Guide to Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Style- Here’s a good read for the other man in your life when he is in between watching reruns of RuPaul’s Drag Race on Logo.

2. The Complete Series of Queer As Folk- If he’s single then he will love you for this one. He will be consumed with hours upon hours of drama, relationships, and sex. (Not that his life isn’t full of it already.)

3. Armani Exchange 3D Glasses- Now he can look stylish and won’t be embarrassed to go see Justin Bieber‘s new 3D movie, Never Say Never.

4. An iTunes Gift Card- For the sole reason of buying the new Britney Spears song, Hold It Against Me, and her much anticipated video for the song when it is unveiled in 9 days.

5. A Bottle of Rosé- Nothing seals a loving relationship like getting drunk on an expensive bottle of sparkling wine.

On this season’s aesthetic:

It’s sort of 20s/30s glamour meets East Village punkiness/funkiness. Imagine if Marie Antoinette fell out of the sky and landed in the middle of the East Village. We’re just going to let her have fun. But it’s going to be more refined and upscale.

On his partnership with Angelo:

Angelo’s kind of my design director, we’re a team, doing this line together. I hate titles, that’s the thing, but we’re having fun. We met on 7th St when I had my line, Heatherette, that was my studio. But he’s right across the street still on 7th St.  Keeping it real with the East Village. I was looking for someone to partner up with me and have fun and direct my crazy mind. It’s like when you decorate the Christmas tree, if you have too many ideas you need to edit it…I think Angelo brings refinement to my glittery fun.

On his upcoming runway show:

The show this season is on February 10th at the Hammerstein Ballroom. Fashion Week is usually very exclusive, invite only, but I’m opening my show up like a rock concert this year, letting people in who never really get a chance to go to a fashion show.

I never realized, like a lot of my friends that aren’t in the fashion industry,  I’ll invite them to my show and they’re like, “Oh my god, it was so much fun! I’ve never been to a fashion show before.” I always take it for granted because that’s what I do. It’s fun when people who haven’t experienced it get a chance to and see what it’s about. And it’s as much fun to watch the crowd as it is to watch the show.

This year I’m selling tickets to the show and proceeds go to DOsomething.org as well as Cookies for Kids’ Cancer, which is a charity for little kids who unfortunately have cancer. We have a good friend who passed away in the last couple days…It felt weird at first, selling tickets, but you know if you can help people it makes sense.

Then again this spring, I think I’m going to do another show to launch a partnership with a Fast Fashion House. I guess I’ll be the first designer that’s ever been the face of something they’ve done.

On casting models:

I look for personality. There are so many beautiful people out there that model. I don’t like one kind of look, I like everything. That’s why I love New York. It’s like an 80’s Bennetton ad. You have the amazing black girl with the Asian kid and the gay kid…I just think we all wear clothes, you don’t have to be a size 0 because beauty comes in all sizes.

On pre-Fashion Week jitters:

I don’t get nervous, really, it’s more like happy nerves, excited, energetic. I’m always like what if nobody shows up? I probably asked my mom that before my fifth birthday party. I don’t really get nervous or scared or intimidated, I’m more excited like it’s Christmas Eve. I just want everybody to come and have a good time.

The worst part is when something goes wrong, like when kids can’t get in or something’s wrong with the door. I’m backstage trying to get everything together and I have all these friends on the alert. You don’t know what’s going on and you end up getting in trouble the next three days or five months. That’s where the nerves come from. That’s the nerve-wracking part.

On other fashion shows he’s looking forward to:

I always look forward to all of it. I go to Marc Jacobs every year. He’s an old friend. I love him, he’s supported me a long time as well. But I just go with the flow. Fashion Week is such a rollercoaster, that’s why I like doing opening night because then it’s over with and I can just have fun.

On his celebrity friends walking the runway:

I didn’t really intend, when I started doing fashion shows, to have celebrities at the end. They just happened to be my friends and were out and about. A lot of people in the media are like, “Who are you having this season?” Your guess is as good as mine. I usually just call up some of my friends, ask if they want to do this. If it’s part of a charity, even better. It just kind of unfolds.

I’ll definitely have surprises this season. I don’t know the surprises until they happen. They’re really always last minute. Last year Ellen [Degeneres] finally called two days before [the show]…

I remember one season, Britney Spears and Paris Hilton were in a fight. So Paris is in one car and Britney is in another car. I went out to get them but they both knew each other was there. I didn’t know they were feuding and they decided not to come out of their cars.

And Kimora Lee was also walking so she’s like, “Well, where are Paris and Britney?” I said they’re not coming out and Kimora goes “Well I guess I’m the finale!”

Kimora was great, I like having other designers walk. I think it should all be a big family. I don’t believe in the whole competitive thing, we’re all having fun for the same reason.

On meeting his icons:

My friends enticed me to move to New York and I sort of moved here on a whim. The night I came they threw a party for me at this club in Union Square. I had long finger waves and was wearing this discoball-ish headpiece when Madonna walks up to me with a beer and a cigarette in hand.  She just kind of looked at me like, “Who is this?” and said, “Hey, what’s up?”

I’ve always been a huge fan, obviously, of hers – and I was just like, “WOW. I’m staying in New York!”

And the next night, I was living at the Hotel 17 in Gramercy Park with my friend Amanda Lepore, who was my neighbor and David Bowie was in the elevator with me. I grew up with my brother loving David Bowie. We ended up doing a photoshoot literally outside of my hotel room with Interviewmagazine. Then two nights later I met Debbie Harry!

New York came alive in a week. It just felt like it was meant to be. I think that’s why I appreciate fashion and pop culture so much: the sheer will of having a dream, letting it unfold and hopefully inspiring other people to realize their dreams. Which is what all those artists have done for me.

On his own style:

I pretty much wear everything from Dots and H&M mixed with Chanel, everything from Marc Jacobs to Prada, Dior, The Gap, vintage. I’m just all over the map. I think if you think too much it doesn’t make sense.

But on the flip side, if you do a fashion shoot and somebody else styles you, it’s fun to see how they envision you. Like popstars for example. It’s not really their vision, but somebody else giving it to them. Even Gaga, she’s bringing back to the surface what club kids did for years, but she’s smart about it. She has good people around her.

Kate Moss’s best friend, he’s gay, told me there’s always a good f****t around any fabulous girl. [laughs]

If you want a ticket to enter Richie’s glittery fun world, you can buy them here — that way you can be fabulous and support two great causes!

In an exclamation-point-riddled statement on the NKOTB website, Jonathan absolved Tiffany of any culpability, claiming to be gay for days, gurl:

“I have never been outed by anyone but myself! I did so almost twenty years ago. I never knew that I would have to do it all over again publicly just because I reunited with NKOTB! I have lived my life very openly and have never hidden the fact that I am gay! Apparently the pre requisite to being a gay public figure is to appear on the cover of a magazine with the caption ‘I am gay’. I apologize for not doing so if this is what was expected! My belief is that you live your life by example, and not by a caption on a magazine! If there ever has been any confusion about my sexuality, then you are someone that doesn’t even know me!

“I love living my life being open and honest, but at this time I choose not to discuss my private life any further! My fellow band members don’t discuss their private lives with their loved ones and I don’t feel that just because I am gay, I should have to discuss mine!”

Knight also took to Twitter to defend his one-time ex-girlfriend/fag hag:

“I’d also appreciate it if the people talking trash about Tiffany and Deborah [Gibson] knock it off and stop being nasty!”

And to express that all’s gay that ends gay:

“@tiffanytunes Tiff, please don’t lose any sleep over it! I know you weren’t being mean and I found it to be funny!”

Jonathan Knight may have a point; so many celebrities and public figures who are gay either don’t come out at all or when they do there has to be a PR blitz about it.

It’s 2011, do people still need to come out? Shouldn’t we be in a place by now where people can just feel comfortable being out and not have to throw open that closet door with the aid of a tabloid?

Link Love: The Huffington Post

1. Go back to being a redhead. Everyone and their enabling mother is blonde in Hollywood these days. Linds looked her best with her natural auburn tresses, in spite of that tacky “Firecrotch” comment from that bloated piece of trash, Brandon Davis.

2. Take the Oscar bait. I’ve always regarded Lindsay as one of the more talented actresses of her generation. She has what few possess and what is impossible to teach: star quality. Oscar-winners Meryl Streep and Jane Fonda have both sung her praises, but she’s not going to get that little man dipped in gold with crap like Just My Luck and I Know Who Killed Me. She needs to take a challenging role that no one will touch — especially since no one will touch her right now — and prove that she’s a legitimate actress. With that said, I need her to gain 300 lbs and play a lesbian who dies from cancer during the Holocaust.

3. Put out a dance record. Though her singing career is on the same shaky ground as her acting career, Lindsay had a few good dance-pop songs during her stretch as a recording artist. Case in point, the 2004 masterwork “Rumors” and 2008′s equally-infectious “Bossy.” Throw that raspy voice over a pounding bass beat and the gays will come running — it’s like our Bat Signal.

4. Avoid the paparazzi. Lindsay managed to sustain her career, or at least her presence in the pop culture zeitgeist, through her love/hate relationship with the paps, but she’s not a Paris Hilton or a Kim Kardashian. She actually has talent. Therefore, she doesn’t have to resort to cheap tricks to keep her name in the headlines. Also, a little downtime might do her good; it builds a little mystery and in this age of over-exposure it would be a nice change of pace to be able to wonder what someone is doing instead of seeing their vagina spread all over the internet.

5. Kill Emma Stone.  There’s only room for one husky-voiced, redheaded starlet in Tinseltown and Emma has all but usurped Lohan’s niche, thanks in part to her wonderful, (Golden Globe-nominated) performance in Easy A. As much as I love Emma, Lindsay was here first and I’ve already invested the past 7 years of my life into Team Lilo. Now that she (somehow) has her license back, she can easily run Emma down at her Starbucks of choice and floor it out of there before anyone’s the wiser.

As she tweeted on New Year’s Day, this is the first day of the rest of her life. If Britney Spears and Drew Barrymore can get  it together, there’s hope for Lindsay.

Photo: Harper’s Bazaar

In January’s Elle magazine, the Black Swan star says:

“I don’t use the Internet but apparently you can find out everything on it. I have my e-mail on my BlackBerry, and that’s about it. I’ve never read a blog, ever.”

To think, Winona’s missed out on all that porn, deranged Britney fans and puppies acting like people?

Sad.

In other news, email totes involves using the internet so in addition to being a thief, you’re also a liar. Winona Liar.

LINK LOVE: Gawker

At least she looks halfway decent. I’m actually really loving the bag.

LINK LOVE: Gawker

The singer turns 29 today.

And although Britney’s been laying low recently, it was announced that she’s recording a new track with “Baby One More Time” producers Dr. Luke and Max Martin to be released sometime next year. (credit: Nylon)

Now this isn’t so much what Britney would look like if she was from the Midwest so much as what Britney will look like in five years. Hair looks good, girl!

How fitting, Sarah Jessica Parker next to a horse. I love the bridle she’s wearing though. Chanel?

After a long day at the secretarial pool, Jennifer Aniston (who actually would be married in Bizarro Midwestern Land) drops by the DQ for a qucik dinner of ice cream and salty tears.

David Beckham‘s dreams of soccer stardom just didn’t pan out after knocking up Victoria in high school. He settled down, working for Vick’s pop’s insurance company and has several mistresses, like this lamb:

Town skank, Tara Reid. Victoria’s seen her in the parking lot of the A&P and has more than once tried to run her down in her Chevy minivan.

Nicole Kidman is currently serving twenty years in jail for murdering her husband whom she claimed was a “latent homosexual.”

No, not this one. John Travolta is still alive and kicking after his third triple bypass and second double chin-ectomy.

Ah, yes, poor Tom Cruise. He came to a grizzly end when Kidman used a hot waffle iron to make grilled cheese with his face. Then ate it.

On a happier note, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are doing just fine. They have twelve kids, and Anthony is 85% sure that at least half of them are his.

After years of living the single life, Ashlee Simpson finally managed to settle down.

She found an unlikely soul mate in Cameron Diaz, but hey, beggars can’t be choosers. Cam may not be the sharpest stiletto on the shoe tree, but Ashlee says she more than makes up for it in the boudoir.

Wild stallion and all-round bad ass, Johnny Depp, can usually be found riding his hog, shooting beer cans or gearing up for a good ole-fashioned lynchin’ with the boys.

As you can see, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are still quite the fashion plates. They even made these dresses! Not that you could tell. Ashley made hers from six discarded king size bed sheets. And MK wrapped a towel around her then tied it with electrical tape. Brilliant.

Paris Hilton, unfortunately lost her mind back in the fifth grade when she started showing up to class without any panties, speaking in a strange baby’s voice and claiming to have invented the phrase “That’s hot.” She’s in a mental hospital where she’s especially popular with some of the…more masculine girls.

Pam Anderson has done well for herself. A successful office manager at a funeral home, she gets all the embalming fluid she likes, which she then uses for throwing homestyle Botox parties.

Eyes were raised in town when Michael Douglas showed up with this young chippy on his arm, Catherine Zeta-Jones. But it turns out they’re just father and daughter who have an incestuous relationship. And that’s old hat. For a second, people thought she might have been Mexican or a Jew. Imagine?

A former Ms. Pine-Sol, Gwen Stefani still has her looks, even if she’s keeping them in her hair and cleavage. But she learned that “a woman’s beauty is the only thing she has or ever will have and once that’s gone, she might as well down a bottle of Ajax and wait for Jesus to come and take her back to Heaven in his divine pick-up truck.” Words of wisdom from her mama:

Sharon Stone. 80 years old and doesn’t look a day over 69.

Flores alleges that Spears walked around naked in her house. As does everyone at some point. Granted there may not be a crew from Access Hollywood in the living room, but it’s her prerogative. It’s. Her. Prerogative.

Brit Brit’s handlers fear that Flores wants to give her the old shake down by having the case tried in civil court and are campaigning for a private case in probate court.

Damn you Flores. Hasn’t Britney suffered enough? As if shouldering the burden of teen pop superstardom, pretending to date Justin Timberlake for all those years and then a pubic breakdown that served as fodder for countless late night talk show hosts for years, the girl deserves some peace.

Where’s that “Leave Britney alone!” tranny when you need her?

Fitting an entire episode into the framework of one artist, or theme can be challenging for Glee and last night proved why. Considering that Glee is sort of the Rocky Horror of today’s generation (misfits finding solace in singing along and generally gaying out together), and that Halloween is around the corner,  it made sense for the show to do an episode devoted entirely to it. But how to do it without resorting to a show within a show?

Well, Ryan Murphy and co. didn’t solve that problem so much as step around it. Still, everything felt a little too stagey (even for this show) and  a lot of plot/character development was sacrificed for production numbers. However, who the hell needs plot when you’re getting all this man candy:

Couple that with the return of John Stamos as Emma Pillsbury’s hunky dentist and Corey Monteith‘s bespectacled hotness and I could’ve been happy watching with the sound off and a box of Kleenex within arm’s length.

The plot, if there was one, involved us revisiting  Emma and Will’s relationship. Will is suddenly jealous that Emma is datable/fuckable now that she’s dating Carl (Stamos). The budding couple have bonded over, you guessed it, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and to get closer to Emma, Will decides to Put On a Horror Show to allegedly fund their trip to the Nationals.

So, Mr. Schue, a shephard of the youth and a sculptor of developing minds, literally uses his students for some sick, psycho-sexual mindgame of Sue Sylversterian proportions. So proud.

Speaking of whom, Sue made her glorious, tracksuited return and my was she missed! Jane Lynch is Glee‘s secret weapon. Anytime the show tapdances too closely towards schmaltz and cheese — which is too often to even try to count — Sue is there with a snide, offensive and biting remark to snatch us from the borderline:

“Halloween is that magical day of the year when a child is told their grandma is a demon who’s been feeding them rat casserole with a crunch garnish of their own scabs.”

And that’s how Sue C’s it.

To round out the fluff, the writers inserted a sub-plot about male body issues. Though a worthy, and oft-neglected topic, it was really just an excuse for probable ex-Bel Ami pornstar, Sam (Chord Overstreet; come on, tell me that’s not a porn name), to show off his abs. Finn, more on the doughy side than Sam, feels the pressure of having to look good in his underwear in front of the whole school.

He works out, does some soul searching, walks the hallways in his underwear and everything is fine.

Back to the Will, Emma, Carl triangle: After getting all Handsy McGee with each other during “Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch Me” we learn that there might still be some spark left in that love engine. When Carl finds out, Will decides to do the right thing and shut down the show. But not before the kids get a chance to do the Time Warp.

I, among millions of others, love The Rocky Horror Picture Show. I’ve never been to one of those dress-up and sing-a-long late night showings, but if I did I’d probably go as Frank-N-Furter since I can never turn down a pair of thigh-high fishnets. However, Glee’s reinterpretation was a little limp. As these kids are supposed to be in high school and high school is supposed to have some sort of moral code, Schue had to soften the material a little.

Thus when Mercedes (as an inspired and — in typical Amber Riley fashion — showstopping, Frank-N-Furter) belts out “Sweet Transvestite,” she ‘s from “Sensational” Transylvania. As if one more tranny would hurt. RHPS is definitely more adult than Glee can convey, but then again, who does Murphy think he is fooling? Glee was never and will never be a wholesome family show.

It’s always had an edge and a darkness to it, which is why it works as a show. When Katie Couric complained about the Glee GQ cover, I had to ask myself, did she miss the episode where Will’s now ex-wife tried to buy Quinn’s unborn bastard child? Or when Kristin Chenoweth as April Rhodes fucked (through implication, yes) the entire football team and got Kurt drunk?

“The Rocky Horror Glee Show” was certainly entertaining, at best. At worst, it’s lack of a strong storyline made this episode seem like just another theme-for-theme’s-sake offering. If they had made the songs fit into the storylines as they did with the Madonna and Britney episodes, rather than doing the opposite, it would have been a stronger episode. Then again, Madonna and Britney have a much larger canon to choose from, so perhaps I’ll just appreciate this episode for what it was:

Delicious.

Kim Kardashian might be considered one of the most “beautiful” people in this world, but maybe if she wasn’t such a control freak she’d be able to keep a relationship long enough, instead of blaming it on being a “work-a-holic.” Let’s work on this Kim I want to see you married soon, let’s see if her babies make the world’s pretties kids list.

Oh Paris, you gotta love her but then again that whole ” i thought it was gum” sort of act is getting old. The bitch of all bitches is already going to be thirty as well you’d think that not going to high school because you party too much would be enough, but Hilton is almost hitting 30 and is still everyones favorite slut, but how does she do it, getting away with all her chaotic drama.?

Nicole Richie just turned thirty and I’d say it’s for the better, even though she had kids with weird names before getting engaged and went from fat to skinny, I’d say her prime is actually thirty.

Britney might be the “pop princess” and got her oportunity to show up on Glee, but can we face it she’s getting old, when are you retiring?

These girls might be my favorite pick of “going down hill” ladies but can you just imagine how they’ll look in about ten more years, I’m still waiting for the plastic surgeries.

I believe in this girl! So I am praying to gawd that these trashy-looking neck tattoos are only temporary.

LINK LOVE: Just Jared

Truth be told the only thing missing in our fashion week lives are all
things Lindsay… Aside from paying some tribute to this wild child
and making some pretty bizarre “Team Lindsey” tees to add to my
Bitchism Couture collection, I think its only right to state 7
positives declaring my love about this golden girl.

1. She’s a natural born ginger, and according to a very annonymous A-list source, gingers are all good luck… even if Brandon Davis (“fire crotch”) might not agree.

2. She’s probably one out of about a good hundred A-list celebs (yes I
said A-list) Who can get away with so many drug addictions and most
likely owns  the most glamorous  “ankle  bracelette”.

3. 6536 her Marilyn Monroe inspired leggings collection which she designed is actually pretty bizarre and great.

4. Not only New York born but even if her little sister is a little on the
promiscuous side at least she hasn’t joined the prego bandwagon… the sister not Lindsay.

5. Has yet to pull a “Britney” aka not majoring in etiquette class in
how to: get out of a car in a mini dress with flashing paparazzi right in front of your door.

6. Even if Mean Girls might be the best movie in her so called acting career before her party girl stage took over, she’s more famous for being herself than any character she’s ever played.

7. She might be a butter face but her body might just be the white
girl version of something close to a Kim K. body.

Agree with me or not everyone knows they love Lindsay and her religion of scandalous  partyisms.

When it comes to sales, publicity, and making history, nudity is the way to do it! The image of Demi Moore nude and peacefully pregnant is forever etched in our minds thanks to Vanity Fair’s August 1991 issue. On the front page ofi-D’s August 2007 issue, we saw more than just a glimpse of then-rising British model Daisy Lowe — just shy of her 18th birthday, of course.

In fashion, it’s all art to us. So to celebrate our favorite of the barely theres, we’ve compiled a gallery of fashion magazine’s most notable nude covers.

LINK LOVE:PHOTOS: Fashion’s Most Famous Naked Magazine Covers

You’d think she would notice she was missing a huge chunk of hair extensions before she walked out the door, but no. Britney Spears ventured out to Crate & Barrel yesterday trying to reminisce about those bald days back in ’07. It might be time for a new hair stylist Brit.

LINK LOVE: Stylelist

SHEfinds rounds up the 9 best espadrilles from around the web, starting at just $28.

Stiletto Jungle is smitten with the new-old Gucci 1973 logo handbags.

Allie is Wired has the scoop on the Britney Spears Glee episode.

Bag Bliss can’t get enough of Balenciaga handbags and shoes!

Feather is in. Everything feather - and Bag Snob has the perfect clutch for you!

Beauty Snob has found the perfect eyeliner that is not only waterproof, but fool proof!

Coquette loves the vintage look and the sparkly gold sequins on Anthropologie’s bow cardigan.

Fashion Pulse Daily has created a helpful guide to the best foldable flats for gals on the go

The Jet Set Girls reveal the secrets to Chanel Couture Fall 2010 makeup as seen in Paris this week.

Second City Style takes you behind the scenes for the JCPenney “Made For” campaign featuring some of your favorite bloggers.

Shopping and Info wants black riding boots from Ann Demeulemeester for Fall 2010.

Beat the heat with cool looks for work at StyleBakery.com

Not convinced the “jeggings” are right for you? These five looks by StyleCaster might just change your mind.

The Beauty Stop raves about the smoothing effects of bath gloves.

Check out our guide to kitten heels, espadrilles, nude shoes, flat sandals and clogs. Don’t forget to peruse our calendar of online sample sales, too.

The Shoe Goddess is definitely a fan of the collaboration between Nicholas Kirkwood and Liberty London!

Related posts:

1. Blog Roundup: Heard On The Web This Week Check out the 9 best maxi dresses from around…
2. Blog Roundup: Heard On The Web This Week SHEfinds rounded up the top 5 little black swimsuits…
3. Blog Roundup: Heard On The Web This Week SHEfinds Broke big  news: Hermes Australia Admits the Birkin…

LINK LOVE:Blog Roundup: Heard On the Web This Week

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Bravo TV’s network reality star from the hit series, The Real Housewives of New York City, Ramona Singer, was the host of the opening of Covet Restaurant & Lounge in midtown Manhattan last week.  This latest swanky hotspot is owned by the man behind Miami’s nightlife resurgence, Eric Milon and entrepreneur Andre Hnatyszak. Eric Milon’s previous venues include South Beach’s The Strand, Prive, The Living Room, Set, all of which have been favorites of Hollywood’s A-list stars including Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Lopez, Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears…Read more

LINK LOVE:Real Housewife Ramona Singer hosts opening of Covet Restaurant + Lounge

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LINK LOVE:Britney Spears Says She Doesn’t Want Her Sons In The Entertainment Business

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Supermodel Naomi Campbell shows off a bald spot during her photoshoot with a Mercedes at a gas station in the Meatpacking Distric. Photo: DISCIULLO/bauergriffinonline.com

If it’s true that stress can make your hair fall out, then supermodel Naomi Campbell must be in desperate need of a vacation. Either that, or she needs to stop wearing the hair extensions that popularized this glam girl’s signature look.

When the iconic 40-year-old was on set yesterday during a New York photoshoot for designer Dennis Basso, her stylist accidentally revealed a major bald spot underneath her long wig when he adjusted her apparel.

While it’s not clear what caused this hair loss, some speculations point to years of wearing lace front weaves or tight hair extensions, which can lead to traction alopecia, a condition that causes the hair to break from repeated and severe braiding, weaving or extensions. Other causes include tight ponytails, as well as hard brushing.

If this is the case, Campbell wouldn’t be the first celebrity to suffer from this type of hair loss in a quest for beauty.

Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Victoria Beckham (who went back to her longer locks just this week) and Alexandra Burke have all reportedly endured similar consequences as a result of their extensions.

The good news for Campbell and other long-hair-seeking-women is this type of hair loss is reversible if caught early.

In the mean time, she could probably rock the bald look quite nicely. Take a look at this model who bared it all!

Is Naomi Campbell Going Bald? originally appeared on StyleList on Tue, 29 Jun 2010 12:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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LINK LOVE:Is Naomi Campbell Going Bald?

Britney Spears tweeted that she designed a capsule collection of shoes for Candie’s. Anyone else feel like this is a lie?

LINK LOVE: NY Mag via BritneySpears/Twitter