Does anyone find this man attractive? Cuz I sure don’t. Especially here, he looks so uncomfortable and unsure of himself, almost guilty. First he kisses himself, then he cries, then he just stares at the mirror, who does that? And who was the creative director behind this shoot? So disappointed in Details!!!

LINKAGE: Dlisted

Has Detials’ gone mad? I’m completely insulted by this image.  Last time I checked mannequins were created for this very reason. I don’t necessary care that she is naked, OR that there are men’s accessories on her naked body, it’s the fact that this is AWEFULLY styled!!! Could there have been a more creative way to display shoes, watches, sunglasses, and belts? You know, without using a human being a prop?

LINKAGE: Jezebel

vs

I am almost certain that the editors of Details magazine thought they could shave a couple inches off of Kanye West’s otherwise puffy jaw and think no one would notice. A less subtle lightening of the eyes is also an egregious, if not incidental act. Taking into consideration that this is a men’s fashion magazine, I am highly doubtful of the latter. Giving that same deadened, blank head-on gaze he’s done way too many times before, a thinned out version of Kanye’s face, and a chest that’s seen too much daylight, comprise the March cover. At least they left the frown lines intact.

“I don’t spend any time on the Internet. I used to, but then I’d cry myself to sleep, thinking everyone in the world hates me. So I stopped. But when the news came that they were bringing back 90210, friends started e-mailing me stuff from fan sites that said Brenda had to be on the show. I can pay my mortgage and ride my horses because of those fans. This is how I can repay them.”

Shannen Doherty, Details Magazine November 2008

It’s hard not to stare (yes we all know you’re hot), but I really want to punch all three of these gossip guys in the face.

Why do they always have the exact same face for every magazine spread?

You know, THAT look!

Starring straight up, mouth a bit open, and why-the-hell-is-your-hair-wet hair set to apparently make woman drool!!!

Well, I’m not drooling… much…

Sidenote. This Details magazine features an article called “Do You Have Douchebag Hair?”. Were the covermodels there to emphasize that point or is it just a coincidence.

Questionable, Very Questionable…

The recent close of Playgirl (most likely due to this) has got me thinking about magazines inability to identify or hold on to their target audience. Playgirl opened it’s doors 35 years ago with the intent of being the mag of choice for empowered females looking for a monthly dose of sexual revolution. By the 1990’s the magazine was better positioned to cater to homosexuals looking for a monthly dose of flaccid phalluses.

Well, it seems that another magazine is on the fence as to whether or not to dedicate itself to it’s target audience and if the publishing rules remain true we’ll be seeing major lay-offs from this pusher of man on man fashion. Details magazine has long been hush-hush about it’s sexual preferences, but in a generation of the blog, where readers can find whatever they want, whenever they want online, don’t you think it would be smart for Details to finally take a few small steps out of the closet?

What “Men” Want?

Last week whilest getting my bi-monthly pedicure, I picked up a copy of the mag not thinking that I was going to be jettisoned into gay-ville. The first few spreads featured twinkilicious boys wearing overly priced designer goods, there was an article on pedophile who dressed like a little boy to endure days of butt sex with two older captors, and a feature called “Anthropology” in which a straight man is analyzed to tell if he was into guys or not (the dead giveaway according to editors was whether or not he had a copy of Details in his hands). So Details, if you’re more than willing to develop articles (which you feel) cater to gay men, why not come out and say what you are, a gay fashion magazine developed by the powers that be at Conde Nast? Or is Conde Nast not ready to be all out in the open, maybe being a little more homophobic than the publishers behind Metro NY, The Advocate and a plethora of other boy friendly titles?

Daddy likes his wizard in leather

Well indies, the matter stands. If you read Details Magazine, you’re probably gay. If you’re husband or boyfriend reads Details Magazine, he’s probably gay. It is the official magazine of men in the closet, so if you have a subscription and don’t want to be associated as a homo, end it now.

And if you’re gay and read Details Magazine, stop immediately. The people of Conde Nast have no desire to represent a magazine that’s openly homosexual, so why would you waste your money supporting them, if they refuse to support (or acknowledge) you.

I’m not bashing or being a phobe, I’m just trying to help one magazine and it’s reader base out of the closet and into the community of men that discovered their appetite for cock meat sandwiches through the most ambiguous magazine on the planet.

Want further proof that Details is in the closet about it’s readerbase? Check out these recent spreads from Conde Nast’s first mangina packed publication…

The World’s Biggest Beauty Pageant for Men

What If You Only Thought You We’re Gay