All Entries Tagged With: "heidi montag"

The Bashed: Celeb Halloween Costumes

I’m so bored I could die. I expect these types of unoriginal Halloween costumes from Midwestern sorority girls, but not from celebrities with unlimited resources. If I were famous, I wouldn’t show my face on camera wearing a bagged costume from the discount aisle at K-Mart. But enough with the complaining; allow me to discuss this wretched mess.

Let me begin with three celebrities that took an overused idea and made it even more unoriginal. Khloe Kardashian, Heidi Montag and Traci Bingham decided to dress like police officers. How groundbreaking. The purpose of Halloween is to actually look like what you are dressing up as. If you want to dress half-naked, get a Playboy bunny costume and rock it out! But these three were a disgraceful bunch of officers. I think it will be hard to chase criminals in heels. All three sets of those tits probably fell out at the end of the night. At least they could arrest each other for indecent exposure.

Oh Mimi, how I love you, but couldn’t you think of something better than this? At least you wore what appears to be a real firefighter’s uniform, but what’s with the bra showing underneath? I know you are more original than this; I know Mariah Carey could have come up with a Halloween costume that was extravagant and unique. You look like another boring college trick-or-treater.

Kendra Wilkinson is dressed how she always dresses. Minus 15 points.

And drumroll please…..my favorite piece-of-shit costume from this year’s Halloween. Aubrey O’Day, what the fuck were you thinking? This is the ugliest mermaid costume I have ever seen. It looks like one of those weird mother-of-the-bride dresses from the “Misses” section in Dillards. I’m almost positive that real mermaids don’t wear mesh fabric over their midriffs. If O’Day would have called herself “Rejected Golden Nugget Cocktail Waitress” instead of a mermaid, I would have praised her for a sense of humor.

This dog is awesome. He/she totally blew all of you suckers out of the water (no pun intended Aubrey).

Thanks, ladies, for defiling my favorite holiday.

Thanks Everyone for the pics

Douchbags Vote Palin, We Support Obama

If this isn’t enough reason to support Obama, I don’t know what is?

R.I.P. Heidiwood

According to Fox News, Heidi Montag’s classy clothing line Heidiwood has been discontinued.  This is reportedly not because of flagging sales, but because Heidiwood retailer Anchor Blue is set to close 40 stores throughout the country.

Heidi Gets Ready to Make White Dress Trash

This isn’t the first time Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt announced some future plans involving the exchange of I dos. Recently; however, Heidi has announced a rather horrifying aspect of the future wedding. What is that scary little secret? Well, it’s probably best that it goes unsaid, but Heidi’s planning on designing her own wedding dress! Don’t get me wrong, this could be a fabulous, innovative road to head down; however, you need some design talent! I don’t know why Heidi would ever want to walk down the isle in her own creation, or anywhere for that matter. Well, at least it’s nearly impossible to scare Spencer away; no worries there Heidi!

Before They Became Pornstars: Heidi Montag

Before:

After:

Well since her boob job Heidi Montag has just been slowly but surely heading down the Aubrey O’ Day path of slutiness. Her new video is just a moving American Apparel ad, and I don’t mean that in a good way, I mean it in a “Oh yes I want you to molest me Dov Charney” kind of way. The video is just a series of compromising positions. So much for being a christian artist, unless she wants to get fondled by a nun.

Thanks Just Jared for the liquid gold that are these pictures

Ten Reasons Why Spencer Pratt Might be is Our Generations Andy Warhol

Interview Magazine might be quick to call Marc Jacobs our generations Andy Warhol, but to give the twinkalicious designer such an honor ignores one key fact, Marc’s old enough to be our dad. That ageist tidbit had me thinking about who in our demographic represents the modern day Warhol and unfortunately all signs pointed to one person, Spencer Pratt. 

The 25 year old producer, mudslinger, media whore, entrepreneur and party boy has in a matter of four years garnered the type of public attention that would make any Warholian raise an eyebrow and take notice.  With his muse, Heidi Montag (a modern day Edie Sedgewick, perhaps), on his arm Spencer Pratt has managed to get massive amounts of coverage for producing works of media art that are about as basic as drawing a can of tomato soup on a canvas. The posterboy for “15 minutes of fame”, Spencer has withstood the deluge of public bashings like a resilient turd cake on the porcelain surface of our society’s tabloid toilet and has pushed his career farther than any reality television to date. 

Don’t think Spencer Pratt is a good candidate for todays Warhol?  Check out our ten reasons why he just might be the artists second coming. 

1. Warhol was responsible for launching the music career of The Velvet Underground. Pratt’s responsible for launching the music career of Heidi Montag, a decision we all will have to live with for the rest of our lives.

2. Warhol made headlines for producing works of art which many critics deemed nothing more than a hoax. Spencer makes headlines for producing bowel movements. 

 3. Warhol’s muse was socialite Edie Sedgewick who tragically died at age 28 from an overdose.  Heidi Montag is 21.

4. Warhol was known for shooting painful to watch, boring art films which nobody ever watched or cared about. Pratt directed Heidi’s first music video. 

5. The success of Andy Warhol helped launched the careers of other pop artists like Jean-Michel Basquiat. The success of Spencer Pratt helped launch Bromance…

Andy Warhol as The Boy Wonder with Nico as Batman

6. Andy Warhol loved superheroes and was know for producing art featuring Superman and the film Batman Dracula. Spencer did this …

7. Andy Warhol founded Interview magazine, a gossip publication dedicated to his favorite celebrities. 100% of Spencer’s income comes from selling before and after picts of his girlfriends boob job to In Touch Weekly. 

8. Much of Warhol’s work explored the nude male form and were deemed homoerotic.  Spencer Pratt just got offered $1 million to appear nude in Playgirl. Oh yeah, and Bromance…

9. Andy Warhol’s work has been used to sell snowboards, sneakers, dresses, school supplies, perfume, thong bikinis, and cans of Campbell’s soup. Spencer Pratt’s been used to sell issues of Radar Magazine. 

10. Andy Warhol predicted that in the future everyone would have 15 minutes of fame. Spencer Pratt to the utter dismay of America has fulfilled that prophesy.