- Celebrities are clamoring to spice up their red carpet lives by wearing Victoria Beckham to this year’s Oscars. [Daily Mail]

- Victoria’s Secret Angel Kylie Bisutti apparently took her title too seriously and quit VS because god doesn’t care for that kind of behavior in his heavenly hosts. [Vogue UK]

- Ellen DeGeneres took the moral high road in responding to the One Million Moms group that wanted JC Penney to dump her for being a big ole lez. I, however will continue skipping merrily along on the low road by saying, “Suck on that, trash.” [EW]

- Christian Siriano may have been denied membership to the CFDA, but he’s “fine” with not being “a Wang or a Wu” as long as he has wads of cash to wipe his tears. [NYT]

- Kanye West is showing his sophomore collection on March 6 at 9:30 pm during Paris Fashion Week. Anna Wintour is expected to leave at 9:31. [WWD]

- Hey, Linds, your tit’s out. Oh, nevermind, you’re with Terry Richardson. Carry on. [Terry's Diary]

Franco’s first of his “Episodes of an Untitled Film” will debut on February 15 on Seven’s YouTube channel with a new episode premiering every week. The aforementioned “Untitled Film” is actually titled The Death of Natalie Wood, an extended three-hour version of which will be played as part of “Rebel,” an art installation at the Museum of Contemporary Art in Los Angeles. Inspired by Rebel without a Cause starring Wood and James Dean, “Rebel” also features work from Ed Ruscha, Paul McCarthy, Damon McCarthy, Aaron Young and Harmony Korine.

Franco’s interest cum obsession with James Dean is akin to Linday Lohan‘s obsession cum super-obsession with Marilyn Monroe, only to a more successful — and a more clothed — degree. You may remember that post-Freaks and Geeks Franco played Dean in a made-for-TV movie and later directed a biographical movie on Sal Mineo, Dean’s tragic sidekick in the 1955 classic. “Part of me wanted to fill it out and do a tribute to Natalie Wood, as well,” Franco said in reference to the untitled film’s title.

As for his collaboration with Seven, Franco had this to say about it: “The videos have a vintage feel to them. They feel like they are from a different era, which I think really fits with the new line that Seven had in the shoot — a lot of cool denim tops and jeans…The look of the film and the clothes feels very Seventies. We shot right on the beach and drove up the PCH [Pacific Coast Highway], so I guess you could say it’s a vintage 1970’s California dreamy feel. The movies that I cut together have a lot of weird double exposures and super- imposed images over other images, so it’s a real, I guess you could say, trip.”

The film features a cast of models/actors/artists/musicians I’ve never heard of — as well as a cameo by Franco himself — while Lily Donaldson takes center stage in the print campaign (above). And while he’s no stranger to modeling as the broodingly handsome face of Gucci for the past few seasons, Jimmy Francs is also in talks to move behind the camera to direct something for the Italian house. [WWD]

Check out a behind-the-scenes look at James Franco’s Seven for All Mankind film below:

- David’s wife Victoria, however, knows exactly what she’s doing on the cover of i-D. [Telegraph]

- John Galliano resurfaced recently to fete the birthday of a close friend. And not a single Jew was harmed — it’s called progress, people. [Page Six]

- Beyoncé‘s twins made their first public appearance last night. [The Cut]

- Lindsay Lohan + Terry Richardson = CLASS. The two professional provocateurs teamed up for an unsurprisingly trashy photoshoot for LOVE Magazine. [Highsnobiety]

- The gays may soon be able to marry in California again after a federal appeals court ruled Prop 8 unconstitutional. But there’s still time to appeal so don’t start registering at Bendel‘s yet, queens. [Huff Po]

- Speaking of a disenfranchised subset of society: models. They have rights too!  They’re not sure what they are, but dammit, they have them. And now a non-profit group to represent them. [Racked]

- Michelle Williams took a break from snatching trophies to star in Band of Outsiders‘ latest campaign. [Paper]

- Miu Miu will debut a limited edition collection of 46 handbags during the major fashion weeks beginning with New York. Start coveting, kids. [Fashionista]

- The mogul currently known as Diddy is being sued over his Empress fragrance by the similarly titled Empress Hair Care Products. Because there are only so many classy, royal-themed names to go around. [Fashion Etc]

- David Beckham‘s commercial for his bodywear line with H&M will debut during the Super Bowl, giving you all at least one reason to tune in.

- Betty White celebrates her 90th birthday today and as befits a TV and entertainment legend, NBC put together a little special featuring other people who continue to openly mock death. [Washington Post]

- It’s showdown of the has-been starlets! Lindsay Lohan and Megan Fox are reportedly vying for the made-for-TV role of a lifetime — on Lifetime —  as Elizabeth Taylor. [E!]

- L.L. Bean produced a Bootmobile that’s too big to fit the delicate foot of the Statue of Liberty. And good thing because I don’t want the symbol of this country in anything less than a stiletto, thank you. [Racked]

- The day before the birth of Blue Ivy Carter, over half of Papa Jay-Z‘s New York Rocawear employees were laid off for “economic reasons.”  Hey, someone’s got to pay for that $3500 lucite crib. [The Cut]

- Meanwhile, Momma Beyoncé‘s skin was apparently lightened for new promo pics for 4. Yawn. [Huff Po]

- Karl Lagerfeld, Marc Jacobs and others get the Squarepants treatment, courtesy of Dutch illustrator Mike Frederiqo. [Hint]

Wasikowska, who once told Vogue UK that she was ”not sure about becoming a campaign star” and that “it would depend on what brand is, what it was for…” fits nicely into the Miu Miu stable of starlets. And because the 23-year-old is of age and not allegedly in harm’s way, chances are her ads won’t be deemed “irresponsible.”

Photos: Models.com

- With New York Fashion Week only a month away — cue panic attack — the CFDA wants to make sure you’re not freebasing Sugarfree Red Bulls and replacing the sugar in your coffee with cocaine by hosting a panel dedicated to living healthy. If I wanted to live healthy during fashion week I’d just sleep through it. [The Cut]

- Time to tune into TRL and vote for your favorite videos of the day! Oh, wait, it’s not 1998. But it certainly feels like it now that 90s R&B divas Brandy and Monica are reuniting to sing-argue who the boy really belongs to for their new duet, “Turn the Lights On.” I just hope the video involves a split-screen and a tube-top turtleneck. [Buzzfeed]

- Kim Kardashian wished Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge née Kate Middleton a happy birthday the only way she knew how: with a convenient product placement. Meanwhile, if the Duchess is ever caught dead in a Shoedazzle heel, all the style points she earned with that McQueen wedding gown will go right out the window. [Huff Po]

-  Models just can’t keep it in their pants these days. Molly Sims is the latest catwalker to get knocked up. [Modelinia]

- Barbie may be making some questionable choices as of late, but the pint-sized fashion plate has never looked so badass, thanks to these amazing printable hair extensions. Now if they just came out with these in human size. [Refinery29]

- PETA strikes again. The most annoying people in the world have now taken issue with Oscar de la Renta’s Beats by Dre headphones, imploring beatsmith Dr. Dre to use his “tremendous amount of influence on young people…to advocate kindness toward animals by pledging never to design with real fur and exotic skins.” The good doctor, unsurprisingly, has not responded. [Huff Po]

- In the age of viral this and social media that, why let something as petty as death interfere with your internet life? Now you don’t have to, thanks to a new app that ensures your last words will be disseminated to all your Facebook friends, in the event of your untimely passing. But more importantly, can you poke some one from beyond… [Refinery29]

- Fresh off the devastating loss of her luggage, Rachel Zoe and Jimmy Choo co-founder Tamara Mellon joined gal pals and maybe-sorta couple Marc Jacobs and Lorenzo Martone in St. Barts on vacation. [Styleite]

- Congrats gays in Hawaii and Delware! You can now get civil union’d — the low-calorie, no fat, no frills version of actually getting married. [Towleroad]

- And speaking of gays getting married, noted twirler and triple axler Johnny Weir married his boyfriend on New Year’s Eve. [Towleroad]

- Cable guys are apparently dressing better these days and while that means khakis and a performance fleece, it’s still better than butt cracks and exposed hairy navels. [NYT]

- Actress Ellen Barkin was involved in an altercation with an NYPD officer who pushed the Tony Award winner seemingly for no reason. The incident was captured on video by Barkin’s rumored boyfriend, director Sam Levinson. [TMZ]

- And speaking of crazy blond actresses and law enforcement, the LAPD was called to the home of part-time criminal and full-time shitshow Lindsay Lohan, but this time LiLo wasn’t the one carted away in handcuffs. A strange man was arrested for trespassing after showing up announced at Lohan’s door. [TMZ]

Mariah Carey – “All I Want for Christmas Is You”

Looks like someone's got a monkey on their back named Tony Montana

The findings are “shocking,” at least according to one official who claims that coke use has become more widespread. This study, it should be noted, was conducted in the UK — also known as Europe’s cocaine capital two years running! (snort that, Germany) — so it’s really those British babies that need a good talking to. American babies, I’m assuming, are still getting their kicks the old-fashioned way: boobies, bottles and Binkies.  But it’s only a matter of time before the specter of hard drugs rears its ugly head stateside.

One day you’ll be at the mall, or the courthouse, or the police station, or the church/mosque/synagogue/other place of worship, going about the glamorous task of changing your child’s soiled underthings, when next thing you know: the DEA kicks down the door, rips the baby out of your arms Elian Gonzalez-style, and hauls that nascent nogoodnik off to a holding cell where its cries for “Mama” will go ruthlessly unheeded. Cut to a life spent goo-ing and gaga-ing strangers for the slightest bit of rock.

And I don’t think you want that to happen so…we need to talk about your baby’s cocaine problem. [Mirror]

Considering Lindsay was probably cracked out of her mind and on her way to prison I personally think these came out pretty glamourous. Before you disagree consider how bad it COULD have turned out. Flip through the pictures yourself and leave your opinion in the comment section.

Who took the photo of the cover and how it was leaked will forever remain a mystery — or we could just cut the bull and assume Lindsay snapped it on the passenger seat of her SUV while speeding down the highway with a Starbucks laced with whiskey in one hand and a cigarette in the other, then sent it in to a few “reputable” sources. Either way, Lohan only plans on doing one interview to promote her Play-time and that interview, rather bafflingly, is with daytime’s favorite lesbian — you’ll get ‘em next year, Maddow – Ellen Degeneres.

The sometime Sapphic sister will stop by the Ellen Degeneres Show on December 15 to reveal her spread — I seriously almost threw up in my mouth just then — a “tasteful” and “classy” tribute to Marilyn Monroe‘s classic pictorial by Tom Kelley. The cover, though, pays homage to another Playboy classic;  the October 1971 issue which featured Darine Stern,  the first black model to appear on the cover by herself. I can’t wait to see Ellen and her audience of soccer moms and unemployed homosexuals writhe uncomfortably in their seats while Lohan discusses the artistic merit and historic significance of the shoot. DVRs at the ready, kids! [Huff Po]

Update: And after the entire spread leaked to the internet — you’re welcome — Hugh Hefner has announced that Lindsay’s Playboy issue will hit newsstands early to capitalize on the buzz/to make as much cash as possible before everyone gets tired of it. The Hef tweeted Friday: “Because of the interest & the Internet leak, we’re releasing the Lindsay Lohan issue early.”

Then: “The Lindsay Lohan issue of Playboy is going to be a true Collector’s Edition.”

And after referring to the landmark issue as “Hot. Hot. Hot.n [sic],” Hef decided to bring it to an even deeper level of creepy: “The Lindsey Lohan issue will make the perfect Christmas issue for men in your life–father, son, husband, boyfriend, whoever.”

And this is exactly why you don’t want your grandparents on the Twitter. [MTV]

In his new book, Hedy’s Folly: The Life and Breakthrough Inventions of Hedy Lamarr, the Most Beautiful Woman in the World, Richard Rhodes dips his quill into the actress’ inkwell of kookery to detail her long-neglected contributions to modern science…and badassery.

At 18, Lamarr starred in 1933′s Ecstasy, a highly controversial Czezh film featuring a nude Lamarr and filmdom’s first depiction of a female orgasm. Around that time, Lamarr unhappily married an Austrian arms dealer — it’s just something you do once breaking down sexual taboos before hitting legal drinking age. The Austrian arms dealer husband would invite Nazi generals over for a little tea and tyranny where they would discuss weapons — and Lamarr eagerly listened.

Perhaps not too keen on being a Nazi war bride, the time came for Hedy to escape her marriage. She claimed she dressed up as a maid and jumped out the window to freedom, but in truth she hopped a steamer that had one of the most, if not the most influential man in Hollywood at that time — MGM’s Louis B. Mayer. By the end of the trip, she had a seven-year, $3000/week contract with the studio. Sure it’s no $20 mil per film, but that was big money then…hell, it ain’t that bad now.

According to Rhodes, Lamarr “was keenly aware of the coming war. She was glued to the newspaper, reading the stories. … When German submarines began torpedoing passenger liners, she felt at that point, ‘I’ve got to invent something that will put a stop to that.’ ” Along with the avant-garde composer George Antheil, she conceived and patened a frequency-hopping torpedo guidance system in 1942. Seven years later Hedy accomplished another equally-impressive feat when she won the Sour Apple Award for Least Cooperative Actress at the now defunct Golden Apple Awards.

Antheil and Lamarr gave their invention to the U.S. Navy, which was openly unimpressed. Those swarthy sailors buried the invention for a while and the patent eventually expired. Then in 1962,  during the Cuban Missile Crisis, the Navy resurrected George and Heddy’s idea, but by then Antheil had already died. Finally in 1997, Lamarr was recognized by the Electronic Frontier Foundation — she died three years later at  age 86.

Although Lamarr doesn’t enjoy the same level of esteem given to many of her contemporary movie stars, her frequency-hopping invention is the basis for a lot of wireless technology including WiFi, cell phones and Bluetooth. Not bad for a girl who got her start faking it for a pay-Czech.. [LA Times Blog]

Hugh Hefner, reportedly unhappy with LiLo’s first Playboy shoot, had the professional ex-convict come back to the manse for a second photoshoot with a second photographer. But fear not pervs, the Lohan Playboy issue is still scheduled to hit newsstands for January. However, don’t expect her to go all spread eagle because this is a classy affair. We’re talking tits out but panties on. Because she’s a frikkin’ lady and don’t you frikkin’  forget it! [E!]

*Sidebar: Can we talk about how the Lohan has spent more time behind bars than most rappers, which I think is a sad commentary on the state of hip-hop today. When a white girl from Long Island who was a Disney star before puberty has more street cred than you, it’s time to hang up the mic and call it a day.

On New York:

“I love London and Paris; they’re very sophisticated, but not like New York. If you can’t find it in New York, it doesn’t exist.”

On New York in the 50s:

“It was fabulous then, everyone looked beautiful.”

On New York today:

“Now when I walk down Fifth Avenue in the summertime I just want to throw up. It seems that the fatter and uglier people are, the fewer clothes they wear. The shorts and flip-flops and tight jeans on butts that go from here to Poughkeepsie. I always say they should put people in jail for wearing clothes like that. Especially stretch jeans over size 10 — they should be outlawed. Ten years ago people were starting to look like slobs in New York, now it’s an epidemic.”

On London style:

“I haven’t been in London for some years but the last time I was there they looked fuddy-duddy and school-marmish, yes, but not slobby. And then there are the wonderful eccentrics like the kids on Carnaby Street or the punks or whatever the heck they are.”

On meeting Duke Ellington:

“The Duke couldn’t have been nicer and said he’d introduce me to all the greats in Chicago. My mother was very dubious, so I told her, ‘He’s the most elegant gentleman.’ She said, ‘I don’t give a damn how elegant he is, you’re not going to Chicago.’ But I did.”

On dieting:

“I used to smoke like a fiend. I smoked four packs a day. I never do anything half-arsed, shall we say, but I stopped because I felt I was getting to be an addict. I’ve got very good willpower.”

On being asked to be Lindsay’s style guru:

“I can’t tell people how to have style. No amount of money can buy you style. It’s just instinctive.”

On her 2005 exhibit at The Met:

‘It didn’t start out as a fashion show, but he [Harold Koda, curator of the Costume Institute] decided that to show accessories out of context didn’t make much sense so he asked if I could spare maybe five outfits… I said yes, so they went through all my closets, all the drawers, all the boxes, all the armoires, under the bed, everywhere and they go woowoowoooo [she flaps her arms up and down]. Finally they ended up with 82 outfits. It was insanity but the show was such a big smash.”

On her signature glasses:

“When I needed to wear glasses, I decided I’d wear glasses. All the better to see you with.’”

On kids these days:

“Most of the young people today look dreadful.”

On stars these days:

“And celebrities look even worse. They don’t know what to do with themselves. At the Golden Globes and Oscars they all look alike – it seems like they’re all wearing the same nightgown and this year nobody had any jewellery at all. Only Helen Mirren was wearing a beautiful necklace, but even she got it wrong because the necklace just ruined the dress. I think the designer must have wanted to kill himself when he saw her.”

On throwing shade:

“It’s a free country — if you want to look like a freak, that’s your problem.”

As a result of her drunk driving case of 2007 and her jewelry theft from last year, she has one full year to complete 360 hours of community service, and there is much speculation on how much was actually completed.  She has been spotted doing some service work, but she has been much more frequently spotted on red carpets around Europe. Taking bets now, do you think that she played her part or deserves a few more hours behind bars? [TMZ]

Gwen Stefani back in the day when she rocked that classic cotton candy hair.

- And that info was previously unheard because it probably never got spoken. YSL came out with a statement disclaiming Menkes’ rumor milling. [Styleite]

- Daphne Guinness will eat when she’s dead. I hope she waits a few days after she’s dead to indulge since no one likes a fat corpse and I’m assuming there will be an open casket. Or at least a translucent block and a lace veil. [The Cut]

Photo: Styleite

- Lindsay Lohan agreed to star in German designer Philipp Plein‘s ad campaign, sight unseen — but then again a bitch got bills and not enough time to care how they’re getting paid. Of the collaboration, Lilo said that she thinks “maybe people’s perceptions of me have been kind of taken out of context just from what you see and read.” Yeah, you’d think from seeing and reading things that Lindsay Lohan is an unemployable mass of blond extensions, temper tantrums and comped alcohol who’s next acting role is more likely in a straight-to-DVD frat film than a legitimate movie…but that can’t be right. [NY Post]

- The truth about Fashion Week involves cocaine, misogyny, hand jobs, rough sex and absurd diva antics: just what I dreamed it would be as a young gay paging through my September issue of Vogue. [Fashionista]

- Lara Stone claims to have lost her memory from smoking too much pot in her hometown of Bongsville, The Netherlands. BUt I can tell from personal experience that that’s a load of…wait, what was I talking about?[Telegraph]

Photos from Terry Richardson’s Diary

- Lindsay Lohan continues to be employable, if only by German fashion houses you’ve never heard of/care about. This can’t go well, particularly considering the first sentence of the press release announcing Lilo’s participation in Philipp Plein‘s spring campaign: “Lindsay is a beautiful, highly acclaimed actress and model.” Who are we lying to Philipp Plein? [Styleite]

- Frida Gustavsson is GORGEOUS on Paolo Roversi‘s cover of Vogue Italia‘s Couture Supplement, giving us a little flapper chic and some serious face. [Fashion Gone Rogue]

- Designer Alice Temperley thinks London Fashion Week is better than New York Fashion Week and should be longer. Meanwhile, preaching to the choir, girlfriend. [Telegraph]

- Girls fall on the runway every season and, honestly, it’s always a highlight. But turns out taking a catwalk misstep could land a girl face down in unemployment. [Daily Mail]

- Which is why they should take a cue from the pros, like Liu Wen and Jourdan Dunn, who reveal how they traveresed the trricky runways of Jason Wu and Alexander Wang, respectively. [The Cut]

Ungaro CEO and American brand turnaround specialist, Jeffry Aronsson seems optimistic about losing their leader, “We are all here to serve the brand in a modern way. I make new discoveries every day about the talent within these walls.”

Will they make a star of an assistant designer? Let’s see who shines in Paris.

Meanwhile, Giles is onto furthering his own brand. I smell bags, shoes, makeup, perfume, the whole regalia in the coming seasons.

Link Love: WWD

According to The Cut:

“Lohan, without warning, rose from a banquette in a sunken section of the club and sent a drink — still in its glass — sailing over the wall and directly at a cocktail waitress…Just when it seemed things couldn’t get stranger, the lights came on and the music went off. “She’s bleeding!” yelled a man at the bar. Medics surrounded a brunette woman, lying with her black sheer-stocking-ed legs elevated on a white leather couch, adjacent to where Lohan had been sitting. When they lifted her up to place her on a stretcher, the back of her black dress was soaked in blood. Broken glass, a security guard confirmed after she had been rolled out. By then, the crowd had thinned out.” [The Cut]

Designed by Gage/Clemenceau Architects, it’s  got enough mirrored surfaces to send Lindsay Lohan flying right back into rehab. But you have to admit, it’s eye-catching — just don’t catch too much or you might end up with a migraine. But then again, the walls have to compete with a selection of Formichetti’s pieces selected from his work with Mugler and of course, that monster mother Gaga.

The kids at Nicola’s apparently had a few technical difficulties with their registers on Fashion’s Night Out, prompting the stylist-cum-designer to (jokingly, we think) tell everyone to just take whatever they wanted. Luckily for us, everything remained in tact and there’s still plenty of Mugler — both womenswear and menswear — as well as iPhone cases, jewelry candles, t-shirts and exclusive designs by emerging international designers to go around at 50 Walker St from now until September 21st.

Halston with his girls — Bianca Jagger, Liza Minnelli and Michael Jackson

Lisa Chaney, author of Coco Chanel: An Intimate Life, dug up some serious dirt on the legendary designer — one assumes after rolling her over in her grave. In the bio, which comes out in November, Chaney claims Coco was a bisexual drug user who had an affair with a married Salvador Dalí.

Chaney allegedly waded through the Swiss Federal Archives to prove that Chanel also had an affair with a Nazi spy. In an email to WWD, the author’s publicist states, “Whether Chanel was aware of this is unknown, but after that war she lived in neutral Switzerland for a while, to avoid any proceedings against her.”

Quel scandale! Though I can’t wait til they inevitably make a movie out of this book. Standing alongside Audrey Tatou‘s Coco Before Chanel will be Lindsay Lohan‘s Coco After Rehab.  [WWD]

Lilo, Dominique Strauss-Kahn, Casey Anthony. Court has been on the mind as of late, and not always in the most glamorous of ways. Not to worry, fashionistas! Donna Karan is here to soothe your high-heel-induced migraines (ahem, Michelle Bachman) and your sense of propriety with these amazing new images from her Fall/Winter 2011 campaign. The decidedly gray palette understatedly emphasizes the luxurious shapes and fabrics of the collection, and Isabeli Fontana‘s lawyer face makes me want to immediately take out student loans to go to law school (and to buy all of these clothes).

The campaign was shot by Inez Van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin, with creative director Trey Laird and stylist Nicoletta Santoro. Ruling: guilty of major fabulousness. Check out the images below and decide for yourself.

- Lindsay‘s having fun again! If fun construes drunk-crying, sloppily clawing at a curtain and screaming about being deserted by your friends. Which, last time I checked, it does. [Gawker]

- And speaking of amazing crazy people, Mariah Carey‘s back! Making her first public appearance post-baby, Mimi took to — where else — HSN to talk about how hard pregnancy was (47 months!), push around the camera crew, debut her new British accent and trot Nick Cannon out for the lambs, while babbling about her wares some intern briefed her on seconds before air.

Cargo Shorts

Useful. Yes. Practical. Sure. Awful. You betcha. Give me a utilitarian article of clothing anyday of the week, but there’s a time and a place for a multi-pocketed cargo short. And that time is called hiking outdoors or robbing a 7-Eleven.

The shoot took place inside the 2^nd Street tunnel in Los Angeles, shielding LiLo from the harsh glare of the real world the L.A. summer sun.

Shields, who previously shot the actress in April and November of last year before her stint in jail, explained on his website, “A little romance never hurt anyone until it ended,” adding, “In matters of love sometimes you have to be willing to get your hands dirty.” Apparently, Shields is also under the impression that a little boob-grab never hurt anyone.

Lindsay Lohan couldn’t have been anything but gung-ho about this, as we assume her hands are just as dirty as the rest of her.

Click through below to see the shoot!

Link Love: [Styleite]

Photo: The Fashion Spot

Remember that time Lindsay allegedly stole a formula for her “Sevin Nyne by Lindsay Lohan” tanning spray. Rather, do you remember “Sevin Nyne by Lindsay Lohan” tanning spray?

Well, White Wave International Labs Inc. did. And they tried to sue a ho, alleging the “actress” and her business partner — which I’m assuming is not code for scissor sister — copied their formula after obtaining samples of White Wave’s tanner.

Last Thursday, however, a federal judge threw out the case due to lack of personal jurisdiction and citing Lindsay’s indirect ownership of the brand thus freeing her from any breach of contract.

Whew! I’m glad that’s finally over. Now we can get back to what really matters, i.e. this photo from the Lohan VF shoot. Is it just me or does it seem that in 30 (read:10) years, Lindsay will look more or less like Donatella Versace?

Here’s hoping! [WWD]

- Hussein Chalayan was “devastated” when Tom Ford passed him over in 2001 for being “too avant-garde.” I guess birthing eggs weren’t what Gucci was looking for back then. [Vogue UK]

- Vogue‘s coveted September cover will go to Kate Moss and her wedding, shot by go-to Wintour lensman, Mario Testino. And Vanity Fair is going decidedly classy by shooting Lindsay Lohan while under house arrest for their September issue. [Page Six]

- Apparently, Princess Beatrice has been listening to the haters and has hired full-blown fashionista Emma Watson‘s stylist for $2400/day. Meanwhile, throw that glorified basketball hoop of a Philip Treacy hat back on and stop boring me. [Styleite]

- Ice queen Johnny Weir will be the face of MAC Cosmetics‘ holiday collection, “Glitter and Ice.” [Page Six]

- And if that isn’t gay enough for you, check out the windows of Michael Kors Bleecker Street  location in celebration of the recently passed same-sex marriage bill. Those brides are actually drag queens, FYI. [Racked]

The Dubious Bisexual may be gay, may be straight, or may just like to drink a lot so they have an excuse to grope anything within reach. Who knows and furthermore who cares? After having their names sullied by drunk college girls and dudes on the down-low the nation over, the Dubious Bisexual is a wild card who’s hard to please but pleased to be easy.

- Summer Tank. Pride is like the beginning of gay summer — a Mo-morial Day if you will — and the Dubious Bisexual has a right to bare arms like any queer American. Calvin Klein‘s simple but vibrant Spring 2012 mens collection will look great when being flanked by a girl or guy or if they’re lucky, both.

- The Joe Francis Signature Collection. The success of Francis’ Girls Gone Wild franchise led to the less popular —  and also less slutty, thank you very much — Guys Gone Wild. Both videos have enough passably attractive nudity to entertain even the most Dubious of Bisexuals, though the guys — to general audience chagrin — have something against making out.

Photo: Sodahead

- Janet Jackson’s The Velvet Rope. Janet’s last great gasp of musical brilliance before succumbing to pop royalty complacency, The Velvet Rope stands as a pride classic. Besides the thumping disco-tinged ode to friends lost to AIDS, “Together Again,” Janet bolsters the “It’s fine to be who you are” mantra nearly15 years before Gaga‘s “Born This Way” with “Free Xone” that should resonate with the oft-marginalized bisexual. And then there’s the bi-curious cover of Rod Stewart’s “Tonight’s the Night” that will put the Dubious Bisexual in the mood for man and/or lady love.

- Absinthe. To finally push the Dubious Bisexual over that questioning hump, sometimes regular alcohol just won’t cut it. Between 90 and 148 proof, the infamous liquor is wildly available since the US lifted a ban in 2007, but you’ll more than likely find pale imitations. Nevertheless, absinthe provides a completely plausible and unquestionable reason for anything. And I mean anything.

- Simon Doonan continues to be in the running for “World’s Best Person” with his advice to FIT grads: ”Make sure you have at least one drag queen in your life.” They’re very “life-affirming.” That’s the kind of real-world advice I like to hear. [Racked]

-Remember that time that Michelle Obama met Kate Middleton and I literally collapsed on the floor in a fit of screams and panting from all the fierceness. Because all of that happened. [The Cut]

- Behold new comedy duo Lady Gaga and David Letterman. They’re like an old Vaudeville act, if Vaudeville was full of ironic, egg-incubating popstars eating paper in nothing but a Viktor & Rolf jacket. Which it was. [Refinery29]

- A look back on the style of the romance of the century also known as Oprah and Gayle Stedman. [Fashionista]

- And of course, today is the last episode of The Oprah Winfrey Show. I haven’t seen it yet, but I can imagine when I do I will openly weep for hours until I eventually just turn into a pillar of salt. At least we still have OWN.

- While Galliano awaits his fate, Lindsay Lohan will be facing hers; the shoplifting starlet will report to jail on June 17th. Lohan also tested positive for booze in February, to the shock and consternation of absolutely no one. [CNN]

- Kerry Campbell and her 8-year-old daughter Britney appeared on Good Morning America to defend Kerry’s choice of giving her child Botox. For some reason raging stupidity, clinical insanity and “I got bored” were not among the reasons given. [Stylelist]

Photo: Global Grind

- People‘s latest covergirl Pippa Middleton, just got her (side)boobs put on blast while vacationing in Ibiza. Those Middletons are really classing up the Crown. [The Frisky]

- Oscar also-ran Leonardo DiCaprio and his supermodel girlfriend Bar Refaeli have officially split up and Leo’s relationship with noted heterosexual Bradley Cooper is somehow involved. Apparently there was a “boys’ weekend” in Mexico that’s to blame. [Page Six]

- Fellow A-lister George Clooney laid down the law on a trio of Italians who used Clooney’s name and image to launch their GC clothing line. Their one (of many) mistakes: Photoshopping Clooney in a pair of jean shorts. [Styleite]

- With the Met Gala, the Fashion World’s Oscars only a few hours away, what better way to celebrate (especially if your invitation was lost in the mail like mine, I’m assuming, was), then to take a stroll down memory lane of the Costume Institute‘s patron saint, Anna Wintour‘s ball looks over the years. Time had the unmitigated gaul to name Vogue‘s editrix the worst-dressed of the year for her Chanel Couture from 2008′s Superheroes exhibit, but hopefully whoever had the cheek to write that is hanging by his/her nipples in a dungeon in France somewhere. Where they belong. [Fashionologie]

- J. Crew‘s new catalog features employees modeling their clothes, including openly gay designer “Somsack” and his boyfriend “Micah,” that for some reason is deemed “explicit.” Dear “Straight” World, the gays date and wear clothes. That is when we’re not secretly plotting against the moral fiber of America and recruiting your children to our degenerate way of life. Actually, you know what, we can do both since our people are natural multi-taskers. — Love, The Gays [Refinery29]

- New W Fashion and Style Director, Edward Enninful describes his vision for the mag as thus: “I want editorial to be filled with ideas. It’s very important to capture the mood of the collections and bring narrative onto the pages. It’s also very important to be forward-thinking but remain wearable. We should project what’s going to come, take from the past and bring something new, and document what’s around now.” That means practically nothing to me, but I’m hoping it will translate into tons of black models and couture out the wazoo. [Style File]

- Professional jailbird Lindsay Lohan still somehow manages to find work, this time giving face on the cover of Blank, photographed by Steven Gomillion and Dennis Leupold. I’m holding out hope for a jailhouse photoshoot during the four months she’ll be locked up. [DesignScene]

- Cool-kids-about-town and adorable design duo, Jack McCollough and Lazaro Hernandez of Proenza Schouler are starting their own costume jewelry line, set to launch during the pre-collection season. I’m assuming this won’t be Claire’s-level bobbles but I wouldn’t mind a PS tribal beaded necklace bunch. [WWD]

Celebrities and Fashion have always been synonymous. However, today more than ever, fashion magazines are featuring more celebrities than immigrants trying to get into the USA for their Green Card. In many cases these highly regarded magazines are using celebrities more often than Super Models for their covers. There are many reasons for this and in my opinion some of those decisions have more to do with the Politics of Fashion than the notoriety of the Celebrity.

Why is it that some of the Biggy Fashion Mags don’t feature Super Models, but do feature Celebrities from all sectors of the Entertainment Industry?  I believe that it is because they can’t get the Super Models for their magazines. In fact their are very few magazines that can get Super Models and find it a lot easier to get Celebrities to adorn the covers of their ELLE’s, Marie Claire’s etc…

It is true that Celebs sell and can attract a large audience, but when it comes to the giants vying for THAT Top Model, that is where only a few of the Biggies like VOGUE, Harper’s BAZAAR, ELLE and a few other more obscure, but none the less important magazines like Numéro, V and perhaps L’Officiel can get on occasion.

Of course many would argue that the reason that this or that fashion magazine are shooting Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears or Paris Hilton is because they sell magazines. That may be true, but I am quite sure that if all of the major and lesser influential fashion magazines attempted to compete for the creme de la creme of the modelling industry and could only get models and not celebrities, that the King of the heap would surface really quickly. You would see immediately by the standard of the models acquired who really rules the game.

Thus again the reason why Celebs act as a great draw that diverts the attention from the obvious omission from the covers of “Fashion” Magazines of Top Models. Why would a major fashion magazine want to be judged by their peers and the public based on the fact that so and so was on this magazines cover but not on theirs? Celebs are a kind of “Hey we have Paris on our cover wearing Gucci” and not “Hey we could only get so and so and so and so competitor Fashion magazine knows that we could only get so and so because of you know why…”

I am not saying that celebrities should not be on magazine covers. I am saying that a Fashion magazine should be a Fashion Magazine and not a people magazine. Models are part of the Fashion landscape and I am hoping that we can get back to the epoch where fashion magazines did what they did and did it well and leave the people’s magazines to People Magazine.

And lastly, celebrities seem to be more accessible than agents representing those models most of the fashion magazines would love to get on their covers but won’t. They and their PR people understand that the exposure they garner being seen on the cover of Redbook could aid in them getting their next big part in that 2012 blockbuster “Calender’s End”*

So the next time you see the cover of a magazine with a celeb on the cover, you may want to ask yourself, “Did they because they wanted to, or because so and so didn’t want to”.

* (I made that up)

by:Benjamin Kanarek

-Literally, someone pull the Royal Wedding hypodermic needle from the vein that is my daily life or I’m going to land face down in my own vomit. Between puzzles, comic books and now a Lego re-enactment featuring little Lego paparazzi (I’d suggest a Lego Lindsay snorting some Lego cocaine and driving a Lego SUV into them), the Royal Wedding’s been cheapened so much they’re taking out ad space on Kate Middleton’s dress. The bustier is brought to you by Hooters. [The Cut]

- Nutella is releasing a limited edition jar celebrating 150 year of Italian Unity…yeah, I don’t really care about this story I just really like Nutella. And really miss eating.  Le sigh. Well! Time for another Mexican diet pill. [DesignScene]

- With the End of Days getting an early start, TV news is struggling to keep up: “We’ve already had a year’s worth of breaking news coverage, and it’s not even the end of March.” The Apocalypse will be tweeted. [Jezebel]

- Vanity Fair‘s cover featuring a shirtless Rob Lowe (because it’s 1985) seems to not-so-subtly to tell us something: “Rob Lowe Confesses: Running Wild with Charlie Sheen, Sean Penn, Matt Dillon and the Night He Shared a Bed with Tom Cruise.” Rob Lowe likes ‘em cray-cray. [Image Amplified]

- Come April 6th, Miu Miu is getting its very own e-store. This will be the brand’s largest boutique in the world and will offer its full collections meaning you can shop from the comfort of your own home: sitting back in your silk kimono, sipping a dirty martini and smoking from a hilariously long gilded cigarette holder and chuckling at the suckers running around Barneys. [WWD]

- Jimmy Choo is willing to spend £500 million — with the aid of a few backers — to regain his old namesake label. Now I guess Jimmy Choo will know how it feels to go broke trying to buy a pair of his shoes. [Fashionista]

- Leave it to Mimi to paint a butterfly on her soon-to-pop baby belly. Though by the looks of the artwork and the spelling of “dem babies,” methinks Mariah’s other little one, Nick Cannon must have gotten into the finger paints. They’re so cute at that age. [Perez Hilton]

- Lil Wayne covers the latest issue of Interview Magazine, wherein he gets grilled by alleged racist Paris Hilton. The two have surprisingly a lot in common, like they both know: what it’s like to be in jail; what it’s like to make it rain on strippers at 18 years old; and what it’s like to bitch slap Lindsay Lohan. Interview Mag: building bridges. [Refinery29]

- Lady Gaga celebrated her birthday the traditional way: by blowing out the candles on her birthday cake, wearing a nude body stocking and doing a mariachi cover of “Born This Way.”  [Twitter/YouTube]

- Prince Harry threw brother William a stag party this weekend and though the affair was private and sealed off from the prying eyes of the paparazzi, rest assured that “Prince William dropped his trousers and downed pints of bitter as he and brother Harry gave their royal cousin a boozy stag weekend to remember.” Whatever that means. [Daily Beast]

- The Celebrity Meltdown has become the golden ram for the press these days. Catch a celeb on their drunken, coked-up, hooker-drenched downfall and the issues go flying off the stand. So it’s good to know who may or may be following in Charlie Sheen‘s winning footsteps, though I think we all know Miley is a safe bet. [College Candy]

- The Wall Street Journal‘s profile on Vogue editrix Anna Wintour is enlightening. Not only does she explain the mag’s “backbone” (“I think we have a Vogue vocabulary, and there are certain people we like to have as the backbone of the magazine—Vogue‘s signposts.”) but there’s also this handy dandy graph identifying each and every vertebrae of that backbone. One vertebra, however, is in rehab in Arizona right now. [WSJ]

- Professional booozehound and Boardwalk Empire actress Paz de la Huerta was arrested today after making some reality star see actual stars at the Standard Hotel’s Boom Boom Room on Sunday. And of course a drunken-bitch-beatdown wouldn’t be complete without Lindsay Lohan. But the Troubled Starlet was only there to help, removing shards of champagne glass from the reality star’s leg like a regular old Lilo Nightengale. [Daily News]

Photo: Huff Po

- Carine Roitfeld is coming out with a 400-page book entitled Irreverent! (I love when an “!” is included in the name) that lists among its contributors, Olivier Zahm, Cathy Horyn and (brace yourself) Anna Wintour. [Styleite]

- Nylon asks if the onepiece, a “high fashion Snuggie” is a good idea or bad idea. I ask why I’m not wearing one right now. [Nylon]

- Givenchy Couture‘s new CEO, Susan Whiteley is Alexander McQueen‘s old CEO; and Givenchy Couture’s old CEO, Fabrizio Malverdi, is now running Dior Homme. And in this game of fashion musical chairs, Riccardo Tisci is still circling around Dior Couture‘s creative director’s seat. [Fashionista]

- The New York Times compares Lindsay Lohan‘s court-room walk of shame to a catwalk and the red carpet, both things that Lindsay hasn’t been invited near in years. [NYT]

- NBC is working on a new reality competition fashion show in the same vein as The Fashion Show and Project Runway, ingeniously titled, The Fashion Project. As usual, NBC on the forefront of innovation. [The Cut]

- Apparently Rihanna, whose Vogue cover has been compared to the little mermaid can’t hold a candle to Ariel. We could also compare their singing, but Ariel would win that, too —  fins down. [The Hollywood Gossip]

- On a sad note, noted rap singer Nate Dogg has died at 41. In honor of him, my favorite quote from his classic duet with Warren G, “Regulate”: “If you know like I know then you don’t want to step to this’ It’s the G-Funk era, funked out with a gangsta twist/ If you smoke like I smoke then you’re high like everyday/ And if your ass is a buster, 213 will regulate.” Good night, sweet prince. [All Music Blog]

Lindsay offered the following Tweet: “The reports i was at teddys are inaccurate…I was just at roosevelt to meet Samantha and say happy birthday to a friend. i take my sobriety seriously. please dont believe this accusations. i know the rules and i wouldnt risk probation. xoxo L”

Holy Santa Claus! Could Lindsay be serious about her probation this time?

Link Love: PH

- Mimi has revealed that she is expecting a boy and a girl. And baby Nick makes three! [Jezebel]

- Naomi Campbell continues to have the ear of the most powerful men (and women) in the world. Nelson Mandela (thank you), Hugo Chávez and now Vladimir Putin. Who else thinks she’s secretly planning a global takeover? And who else totally can’t wait for it? [GQ UK]

- Stefano Tonchi is getting married to his partner of 25 years, David Maupin and the couple are expecting baby through surrogate in summer. Okay, so he’s been busy getting his life together. Maybe after this summer he can get back to work and turn W into a good magazine again. [NY Mag]

- When did candy hearts start making inappropriate passes at sixth graders? And how can I get a bag? [Gawker]

- Mona Lisa (emphasis on the ‘Mo’) — Renaissance tranny? [NY Post]

- PETA once again succeeds in alienating everyone and making the idea of clubbing baby seals seem preferable to actually supporting PETA. [Jezebel]

- Is Kate Moss engaged? And is her fiance really this haggard-looking, drugged up muppet? [Vogue UK]

- Is 2011 the year of the gentlemen? Men are wearing hats again, finally, and hopefully the fop watch and the monocle will make a similar comeback. [NYT]

- Valentino Garavani will be awarded the Couture Council Award for artistry of fashion this September. I’m expecting a sea of so much Valentino red in the audience the Council will have to call Moses in to part it. [WWD]

- Lindsay: “Yeah, I totally borrowed that necklace you thought I stole and was soooooo going to bring it back after I sold it for coke…a cola. [TMZ]

- Items found in Janis Joplin’s handbag: an antique cigarette holder, several motel and hotel room keys, a box of Kleenex, a compact, a bottle of Southern Comfort (empty), a hip flask, gum, sunglasses, credit cards, aspirin, assorted pens and writing pad and a corkscrew. I assume the hip flask was full of SoCo. At least mine is. [The Hairpin]

- Shit is getting UGLY in the Halle Berry/Gabriel Aubry custody battle. Apart from calling her a “fucking bitch,” the Aussie allegedly (his daughter is part black after all) called her the “N” word. I hope she (finally) put that Oscar to good use and threw it at his gorgeous head. [TMZ]

- Jennifer Aniston confronted professional douchebag Perez Hilton about his cruelty to her. I’d like to confront Jennifer Aniston over her current injustice performed upon me. [Huff Po]

- Sassy black lady, my favorite kind of lady, Jazz Ison Sinkfield has been growing her nails for the past 22 years in an effort to meet Oprah Winfrey. I guess that beats my strategy of slowly growing into Gayle King. [Styleist]

- Speaking of becoming a woman, GLAAD is all in a gay huff over an SNL skit they deem to be “dangerous and blatantly anti-tansgender.” Hey, GLAAD, why don’t you untuck for a second and realize it’s just comedy. Sheesh. [Jezebel]

- Lindsay Lohan is under investigation for filching a $2500 necklace from a Venice, CA store on Jan. 22. I hope she threw in a fur and some diamonds as well because $2500 is not worth going to jail for. [People]

- Sartorial star Anne Hathaway had a rare misstep at the premiere of her latest film. And that step landed her in some truly hideous culottes. [Gawker]

- “Oh my god, did someone just jizz on you while you were on your period?”/ “No, silly, I’m just wearing the new Lady Gaga fragrance. And yes.” [Musings of a Muse]

- Jean Paul Gaultier will have his first museum retrospective in June. Make sure to watch your eyes around those cone bras. [NY Mag]

The LAPD responded to what was described as a “very, very minor incident” around 12.45pm on Tuesday. LiLo spoke with the police before leaving to attend a(n AA?) meeting.

Though no charges were filed, the star of the classic I Know Who Killed Me plans to sic her lawyer on the photog and bid for a restraining order against him.

A source — *cough* Michael Lohan — claims that the paparazzo followed her when she was at the Betty Ford Center” and “follows her everywhere she goes, often speeding and running up to her when it stops at traffic lights. It’s dangerous and stalking.”

You’re on your way back to the top, Linds! The paparazzi are after you again…sooner than you know it someone — *cough* Michael Lohan *cough* — is going to leak a sex tape or reveal a secret lesbian affair and you’ll be a superstar again!

Link Love: Radar Online

What? You mean no more of this?

Lohan reportedly doesn’t even want to “party sober” anymore. Well, I don’t blame her there. What’s the point in partying if you can actually remember what and who you did the night before? It’s counterproductive.

Good luck, Linds!

Link Love: Jezebel

The tweet read: Photo Shoot for JJ Japan! xo Lindsay

From what I can see through the burst of reflected camera flash, Lindsay looks pretty good. Totally loving the hair, or weave, or whatever it is. Keep on keeping on girl, let’s make 2011 a productive one.

LINK LOVE: Celebuzz

1. Go back to being a redhead. Everyone and their enabling mother is blonde in Hollywood these days. Linds looked her best with her natural auburn tresses, in spite of that tacky “Firecrotch” comment from that bloated piece of trash, Brandon Davis.

2. Take the Oscar bait. I’ve always regarded Lindsay as one of the more talented actresses of her generation. She has what few possess and what is impossible to teach: star quality. Oscar-winners Meryl Streep and Jane Fonda have both sung her praises, but she’s not going to get that little man dipped in gold with crap like Just My Luck and I Know Who Killed Me. She needs to take a challenging role that no one will touch — especially since no one will touch her right now — and prove that she’s a legitimate actress. With that said, I need her to gain 300 lbs and play a lesbian who dies from cancer during the Holocaust.

3. Put out a dance record. Though her singing career is on the same shaky ground as her acting career, Lindsay had a few good dance-pop songs during her stretch as a recording artist. Case in point, the 2004 masterwork “Rumors” and 2008′s equally-infectious “Bossy.” Throw that raspy voice over a pounding bass beat and the gays will come running — it’s like our Bat Signal.

4. Avoid the paparazzi. Lindsay managed to sustain her career, or at least her presence in the pop culture zeitgeist, through her love/hate relationship with the paps, but she’s not a Paris Hilton or a Kim Kardashian. She actually has talent. Therefore, she doesn’t have to resort to cheap tricks to keep her name in the headlines. Also, a little downtime might do her good; it builds a little mystery and in this age of over-exposure it would be a nice change of pace to be able to wonder what someone is doing instead of seeing their vagina spread all over the internet.

5. Kill Emma Stone.  There’s only room for one husky-voiced, redheaded starlet in Tinseltown and Emma has all but usurped Lohan’s niche, thanks in part to her wonderful, (Golden Globe-nominated) performance in Easy A. As much as I love Emma, Lindsay was here first and I’ve already invested the past 7 years of my life into Team Lilo. Now that she (somehow) has her license back, she can easily run Emma down at her Starbucks of choice and floor it out of there before anyone’s the wiser.

As she tweeted on New Year’s Day, this is the first day of the rest of her life. If Britney Spears and Drew Barrymore can get  it together, there’s hope for Lindsay.

Photo: Harper’s Bazaar

Though technically free to floor it out of Betty Ford and take out whatever paparazzo is foolish enough to get in her way, the Lohan is planning on staying through til the weekend to receive additional treatment.

What-what-what? Could this be a sign of…growth? I’m almost on the verge of tearing up — our little girl’s becoming a woman!