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FASHION / March 9 2011 5:24 PM

Louis Vuitton Rockets to the Penthouse of the Universe for Fall 2011

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Dead. Girl. Walking. Louis Vuitton always kills me, always in the right way. Marc Jacobs certainly had obsession in mind when he designed the Fall 2011 collection, shown today in Paris, ending another long fashion season. “It’s all about fetish,” Jacobs told WWD the night before his show. But what about the collection garnered these feelings of lust and addiction to mere materials? Is it the sleeves and legs recalling leg of mutton cuts, creating voluptuous hourglass silhouettes that could launch 1000 ships? Could it be the rubberized lace garments or refusal to wear pants, a trend I am behind 100 percent. What about the 18-karat gold handbag securely handcuffed to a model’s wrist? Everything from excessive use of the LV logo to tiny little wrist gloves to waxed faux fur, it’s clear the Louis Vuitton woman is magnificent and always will be. Every piece from prim and proper rounded collars to eccentric prints and diamond-shaped sequins to dominatrix corset belts had a place, creating a tremendously cohesive but sundry collection. French maids and elevator porters accessorized the elaborate scene, as models walked from a gilded and black iron retro elevator bank.  Naomi Campbell, terrifying in the chicest of ways, walked the runway, as did Kate Moss who closed the show, cigarette in hand. “Save the best for last” is the saying, and Louis Vuitton is obviously the penthouse of Fashion Week.

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FASHION FAIL, GIRLS / April 13 2009 8:26 AM

WTF!?! Hannah Montana #fashionfail

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WTF!?! Hannah Montana #fashionfail

Since the new Hannah Montana movie made $34 million at the box office, it’s safe to say that her fan base of sugar high, musty young girls and horny, greasy palmed, lurkin’n'lonely old men couldn’t have given a hot colonic about the tragedy she unleashed at the actual premiere. There’s a stylist somewhere that deserves a glass of hot piss to the face for makig a lovely girl look like Penthouse ‘Hoe Dealin Of The Month’. Now no one told me Hannah Montana was going into porn! I mean, is this a showing for a Disney film or did we make a wrong turn and end up at a Jenna Jameson 4 hour featurette. I bet that dress comes with secret pocket filled with complimentary birth control snackin pills and flavored sugar free sexin rubbers. I mean it’s a Missoni, so I guess I should like it but for some reason I have the strong urge to tear up my mama’s house robe and make an attempt at couture, I mean a hoe rag……………and……………….and are those…………………are those Payless shoes?!?! Oh, the WHOREmanity! Miley is too cute to be lookin like someone’s weekend tasty treatz!

Oh Miley m’dear, please just don’t shave your head and attack yo baby daddy SUV with an umbrella-ella-ella-eh-eh-eh!

- Z’maji of HauteBlogXOXO

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