Dita will be rated on the below categories, five being the highest and 1 being the lowest.

Fit: 5

Appropriateness: 5

Trendiness: 4

Styling: 4

Hair: 5

Makeup: 5

Pose: 4

Confidence: 5

This dress looks better on Dita than it does on the runway model by far. She is so gorgeous, and I love how she stays true to her pin-up bombshell fashion and beauty sense. Brava!

Dita Von Teese 'Perez Hilton's Blue Ball 33rd Birthday Celebration', held at Siren Studios - Arrivals Los Angeles, California - 26.03.11 Mandatory Credit: WENN.com/FayesVision

In his suit, LaChapelle alleges RiRi appropriated eight of his images for the video, directed by Melina Matsoukas who was also behind the camera for the singer’s “Rude Boy” video.

You may remember, if your memory consists almost completely of Wikipedia articles as mine does, that this is not the first time that Matsoukas has been accused of plagiarism.

The “Rude Boy” video was criticized for copying M.I.A.‘s video for “Boyz” but Matsoukas defended that video, saying that she “definitely wasn’t trying to rip anybody off” and that “we’re all inspired by similar elements and it came together in that way.”

It’s not clear whether LaChapelle can win this case — intellectual property suits can be tricky — but it certainly raises questions as to where inspiration ends and plagiarism begins. And also raises questions concerning why Perez Hilton is allowed anywhere near a music video.

Photos/Link Love: Daily Mail

- Items found in Janis Joplin’s handbag: an antique cigarette holder, several motel and hotel room keys, a box of Kleenex, a compact, a bottle of Southern Comfort (empty), a hip flask, gum, sunglasses, credit cards, aspirin, assorted pens and writing pad and a corkscrew. I assume the hip flask was full of SoCo. At least mine is. [The Hairpin]

- Shit is getting UGLY in the Halle Berry/Gabriel Aubry custody battle. Apart from calling her a “fucking bitch,” the Aussie allegedly (his daughter is part black after all) called her the “N” word. I hope she (finally) put that Oscar to good use and threw it at his gorgeous head. [TMZ]

- Jennifer Aniston confronted professional douchebag Perez Hilton about his cruelty to her. I’d like to confront Jennifer Aniston over her current injustice performed upon me. [Huff Po]

- Sassy black lady, my favorite kind of lady, Jazz Ison Sinkfield has been growing her nails for the past 22 years in an effort to meet Oprah Winfrey. I guess that beats my strategy of slowly growing into Gayle King. [Styleist]

- Speaking of becoming a woman, GLAAD is all in a gay huff over an SNL skit they deem to be “dangerous and blatantly anti-tansgender.” Hey, GLAAD, why don’t you untuck for a second and realize it’s just comedy. Sheesh. [Jezebel]

- Lindsay Lohan is under investigation for filching a $2500 necklace from a Venice, CA store on Jan. 22. I hope she threw in a fur and some diamonds as well because $2500 is not worth going to jail for. [People]

- Sartorial star Anne Hathaway had a rare misstep at the premiere of her latest film. And that step landed her in some truly hideous culottes. [Gawker]

- “Oh my god, did someone just jizz on you while you were on your period?”/ “No, silly, I’m just wearing the new Lady Gaga fragrance. And yes.” [Musings of a Muse]

- Jean Paul Gaultier will have his first museum retrospective in June. Make sure to watch your eyes around those cone bras. [NY Mag]

I must admit that this might be the funnest (and yes I wrote that on purpose) Rihanna video to date. The video is pretty silly the the songstress from Barbados still manages to keep her sex appeal. (See: Her playboy bunny look in the video) Who doesn’t like a song about Sadomasochism?

What do you think about Riri’s new video?

Answer to WIN! (Click through for details)

The sass master will show us on Jimmy Kimmel Live at midnight tonight, but before that happens, tell us what you think Perez Hilton is up to with that beautiful, unassuming woman and you can win Paris Hilton’s new perfume, Tease.

Which you will probably need to mask the scent of Perez’s ego wafting through your TV set.

Bonus points if you can tell us who the chick on the bed of roses is.

Link Love: Perez Hilton

Paris Hilton launches her new frangrance 'Tease' at SHG's MyStudio nightclub in Hollywood Los Angeles, California - 10.08.10 Mandatory Credit: Apega/WENN.com

yeah stole the photo from Perez and what? How could you not, this is better than Paris Hilton’s barbie doll, and that’s MAJOR… Except for the little fact that the price tag on this box is $1,500.

Quite like it! The company is owned by Indians and has hollywood celebrities who have already made their signature shakes at Millions of Milkshakes like Miley Cyrus, Lindsay Lohan, Pamela Anderson, La Toya Jackson, Kim Kardashian, Ciara, Lil Kim, justin timberlake,Perez Hilton, Stephanie Pratt, Ron Artest, Russell Simmons, Vivica Fox, Aaron Carter, Donny Osmond.

What do you guys think?

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BP has the opportunity to plug the other big hole.

Did you ever have one of those days where nothing seems to make you go mmmm? Far be it from me not to have an opinion on just about everything in today’s headlines, mind you. The Gulf Oil Spill is finally capped. It seems like that saga has gone on longer that than the War in Iraq. Yes, the gusher is sealed, yet there seemed to be no real celebratory hooray from the media. It took second spot to that Wall Street non-starter reform package. Here I thought it was all about the fact that whole areas of land and wildlife were being destroyed, families forced to move away and start new lives, America’s greatest disaster on record. And the response was like…”Ho hum”. Are we that desensitized to great news as opposed to the titanic response to let’s say, Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston’s engagement? How about the 80th newly released audio tape from that crazy lunatic Mel Gibson, kvetching about how broke and horny he is? My suggestion to BP executives and Hilary Rosen, their public relations point person, to combat the unending bad publicity caused by the spill, would be to use the same plugging device on Mel Gibson and watch how quickly the tide will turn for a positive spin. Imagine, a picture of Mel Gibson with a big BP plug in his mouth on the cover of People, Us Weekly, Star, The Huffington Post, Perez Hilton, D-Listed, Gawker. But what do I know?

LINK LOVE:BP To Plug Mel Gibson Next

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Can you believe this guy owns a fashion blog? Perez Hilton is in desperate need of a stylist. The Gossip Blogger who isn’t afraid to bash a few feathers looks like he stumbled out of a Dave Matthews concert onto the red carpet. Perez, it’s Daniel Saynt, please call me so that I can begin dressing you immediately. I love/hate you and you desperately need my help. Free styling Perez. I got your back Mario.

LINK: Did You Know Leona Lewis Owns a Ruffle Clown Collar and a Lace Eye Patch?

Add Your Own Stories on ENVY The Fashion Network

Heidi Tweeted yesterday: “I was just cast in my first feature film comedy! I start filming monday!!!!! this is one of the best days of my life!!! getting icecream to celebrate”

What’s next, Perez Hilton in an action film?

LINK LOVE: Perez Hilton

24316, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - Thursday August 21 2008. EXCLUSIVE: Dressed in lycra, legwarmers and a sweatband, Heidi Montag films an 1980's-inspired music video for her latest single ?Overdosin?. The singer worked with a director, film crew, choreographer and cast of around 16 to produce a funny 80s-themed workout video, with plenty of big hair and bright colours on show! "Overdosin" is Montag's follow-up single to her previous hit singles "Fashion" and "One More Drink". The new video will be aired on Monday 25th August at 1 p.m. Eastern Time on http://heidimontag.com. Photograph: James Breeden, PacificCoastNews.com ***FEE MUST BE AGREED PRIOR TO USAGE*** UK OFFICE: +44 131 225 3333/3322 US OFFICE: 1 310 261 9676

Dear Richie,

Please STOP! Just STOP! You have no talent, your look is soo dated, and your overall attempt at a fashion show was the worst thing I’ve seen since Perez Hilton tried to design wearable garments. Your front row was a joke, making people wait an hour for you to arrive is just plain rude, and then to showcase what you call ‘clothes’ on those you consider ‘models’ on what you consider a ‘runway’ was more painful then it was fun to watch. Not only did I feel dirty and had to go home right away to change my contact lenses, I also got a weave thrown at me by one of your male models, the fear of getting lice made me scream! Eww!

Using Pamela Anderson as a way to get people to attend your ‘event’ is a cheap trick, since she is just as much a has been as you! Her strut down the runway made me want to puke, then I realized you were right behind her on rollerskates which gave way for more uncontrollable bodily functions as I puked a bit in my mouth. You are NOT a designer, or a celebrity at that, you are NOT important, and if you fell off the face of the planet today (as you should do from embarrassment of what you presented to the public last night) you will NOT be missed! And if you choose to continue doing what it is that you do, please take us of your list, as we never want to even hear about your events in the future.

As Daniel Tweeted last night: ‘The real reason McQueen committed suicide, for fear of accidentally catching a glimpse of this show.’

A message from Daniel Saynt, “Attention idiotic bloggers of the world. Taking a photo of a beat up man is not a style of photography invented by Steven Klein so get off your high horses, attempt some real journalism, and piss off.” Navo take it away…

THE MISUNDERSTOOD MR. COLTON

The widely misunderstood and misinterpreted Mr. Charles Caleb Colton (1780–1832) is well-known for his eccentricities. An English writer held up by scholars as an example of someone often quoted, yet rarely understood. Colton’s forgotten work includes books and collections of epigrammatic aphorisms and short essays on conduct, like Lacon, or Many Things in Few Words, addressed to those who think., Lacon, Vol. II, The Conflagration of Moscow, An Ode on the Death of Lord Byron, and an unpublished poem of 600 lines called Modern Antiquity,  all of which has phenomenal popularity in Colton’s time. In the present-day Colton is one of the most quoted author since the twentieth century, and on the book Lacon, volume I, no. 183 is one of my most favorite quotes of all “Imitation is the sincerest of flattery.”

Like the Englishman, Mr. Colton I feel I am widely misunderstood and misinterpreted sometimes, and I seek refuge on books, books give me a high that no opium in the world can ever give, no critic in the world can ever sabotage, books don’t judge, it’s just there to nurture you, and to heal you, now I sound like a hippie, but being a “photographer” who shoots men with six packs or eight packs (its fun) like the rest of the fashion industry, I can’t help but feel “shallow”, especially when most of the people around you quotes “Madonna” and “Ana Wintour” like their “Jesus Christ” or “Buddha”, excuse the pun.

ROLL WITH THE PUNCHES, TOMORROW’S ANOTHER DAY

I’m working now on a novel that channels my creative energy, my juicy life experiences, my fantasies, my hopes, and my secrets into a book, I’m working with a published fiction author/ghostwriter and an editor to help me polish what I wrote and just hope it pays off. I remember writing about my mother for a short story contest back in highschool, if it’s any sign at all, I bagged the first prize, and I remember the judges actually thought it was written by a senior when I was a sophomore at that time, it was the same ART WEEK, I also got the first prize for a painting competition. And now I am a photographer who is trying another chance into that route I never took back in highschool. Filipino’s are known for being over-achievers, and thats how I grew up, to always give my 100% in everything, to be the best version of me, and I assure you it is a bittersweet struggle, the story of my life. Another thing Filipinos are known for, “they are all  fighters”, they thrive on adversity, “Roll with the punches, tomorrow’s another day” like in the movie Jerry Maguire. The greatest and the most literal symbol of those punches is the island nation’s great 21st century hero, he is a fighter who always roll with the punches of life, known to boxing fans and aficionados of the world as “Pac-Man” and the cover boy of the latest Time Magazine Asia Edition, the unstoppable force in the boxing world, Manny Pacquiao. One of the inspiration for the latest cover of MATE MAGAZINE that I took in L.A. and out this month as their year ender for 2009, with the actor/model Marco Dapper.

NAVO: COPYCAT OR PAYING HOMAGE

I love the sadomasochistic film “Fight Club” (1999) based on the Chuck Palahniuk novel that starred Brad Pitt as Tyler Durden and Edward Norton as The Narrator, this film adaptation will always be on my top ten list of best movies in the last decades, I also love the David Cronenberg car-crash fetish film “Crash” (1996) based on the J.G. Ballard novel starring James Spader as James Ballard. Fire is also an important element in the novel that I’m working on, obviously I’m in the mood of burning things, creatively I’m on my “arsonist mode”. The Steven Klein Cover of Justin Timberlake for Arena Homme Plus that never got published to respect the 9/11 attack, they published an alternate cover without the US flag icon, and noted that along with the first cover choice on the inside page with this explanation. Now the million dollar question is, am I a copycat or paying homage? Let the years where my true inspirations talk, Fight Club was released 1999, Crash was 1996 and the Steven Klein’s “Alternate” Arena Homme Plus Cover was on 2001 (a pivotal year for most of us), whether Mr. Klein have seen Brad Pitt’s Fight Club and David Cronenberg’s Crash, one thing is for sure, Mr. Klein worked with Brad Pitt several times and I’m 100% sure he has seen it. Does Film, Magazines, Books and People inspire me?, YES. Do I love Steven Klein’s work?, YES. Is there a lot of “COSMOPOLITAN Magazine educated, PEREZ HILTON wannabee bloggers” out there? YES. Did I pay homage or I ripped off a Steven Klein? You’ll be the judge of that, along with the people who judged, misunderstood, and misinterpreted the man who coined “Imitation is the sincerest of flattery.”

http://www.stevenkleinstudio.com/www/index.html

http://www.mate-magazine.com/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manny_Pacquiao

Any day that Perez Hilton takes a huge, embarassing slap in the face (especially from a man atleast double his age) is a good day for me. I could sit here and try to explain the situation, but you’re better off just watching the video. Surprisingly Perez had nothing on his blog about the situation.

Buzzfeed blesses the world with it’s list of Top 6 Girl-On-Girl Rivalries In History in honor of the show “Bad Girls Club” on Oxygen. The list contains some familiar rivalries like Serena vs. Blair and Angelina vs. Aniston, but I think I’m most disappointed that Perez Hilton vs. Will i am didn’t make the list, those two bitches got screwed!

LINK LOVE: Buzzfeed

What do you get when you get a gay gossip blogger, half-decent talent, unfilled venues, and copious amounts of alcohol? If you guessed a failing tour you are correct! Our friends at Spin Magazine have quite the interesting article detailing how terrible the tour has been going, and how Ida Maria basically spent her past three dates, prior to dropping off the tour, more or less black out drunk and stumbling all over stage. Good work Perez! How come I didn’t hear about all of these happenings on your blog?

I recommend reading the whole article, it’s hilarious! Click here to check it out.

And he wonders why the gays hate him.

Perez Hilton has decided to give up on ever being taken seriously in the fashion world by mixing three of the most dreaded fashion donts; cartoon characters, going pantless and fat.

I’m totally a hater and I know it, but I seriously wouldn’t mind it if Demi Moore lived up to her promise to beat this dude with Rumor’s giant forehead.

LINK LOVE

And here’s Kanye’s hilarious, poorly-written apology that has apparently been taken down already:

Although most of the fashion peeps we love have yet to respond (maybe they were just too busy at Fashion Week parties, or sleeping up for the next day), as have Taylor and Beyonce, here are some responses from music, entertainment, and fashion people that have tweeted what they thought of this escapade:

1. Katy Perry, Singer

2. Perez Hilton, Celebrity Blogger

3. Joel Madden, Good Charlotte

4. Pink, Singer

5. Ryan Seacrest, On Air/American Idol

6. Dane Cook,Comedian (love this one)

7. Jimmy Fallon,  SNL Host (another personal favorite)

8. Audrey Kitching, Model

9. Jeremy Fall, Editor-in-Chief of Cliche Magazine

10. Texts From Last Night, might not be an industry person, but this sure is funny.

11. Bonus: Corey…I think he might be right?

Zoe was off to the dentist. Perez suggested she was off to Botox. Hey Hollywood, did you know in The Bronx it only costs $1000 to have someone break every finger on the hand of someone who owes you money? Just thought you should know.

rzrachelzoe: going to the dentist….then Malibu!

PerezHilton: Is “dentist” code for Botox doctor???

rzrachelzoe: Does being hateful ever get exhausting for u? So sad you made a career out of it.

LINK LOVE: http://twitter.com/rzrachelzoe/statuses/3583006718

We aren’t exactly thrilled that he got it first, but Perez Hilton was sent over a new spread from the Harper’s Bazaar September issue featuring designers Oscar de la Renta, Diane von Furstenburg, Vera Wang, Derek Lam, Thakoon Panichgul, Francisco Costa, Carolina Herrera, and Rodarte‘s Kate and Laura Mulleavy alongside the Muppets from Sesame Street.  Coco Perez made his first mistake by not crediting the photographer, but we aren’t able to leave a comment complaining.

See the rest of the spread on Cult

LINK LOVE: Coco Perez

A Jezebel writer blames gays for ruining fashion. Feminism might be going a bit too far, eh?

So here’s the brief. A Jezebel writer, Tracie Egan, decided to bash gays on her blog, blaming them for “many of the problems in the fashion industry” (though according to the New York Observer that’s me). Actually, she wasn’t really blaming gays as much as being pissy at Perez Hilton for attempting to enter the world of high fashion with CocoPerez, but that’s a different story that requires me to address Perez as a fashion blogger, something I’d rather die than do. Anyways The Cut and The Frisky got their knickers in a bit of a bunch and are now attacking the Tracie saying she’s drinking some major hateraid.

Here’s the quote:

“I think that gay men are actually the most to blame for many of the problems in the fashion industry, like the absence of womanly curves on the runway, and the hideous, figure-assaulting trend that is the tent dress, which no women who have tits, and no straight men who have an appreciation for tits, have any use for.”

Numero Uno Tracie. Many gay men LOVE TITS!!! Seriously, they love grabbing them and fondling them and acting straight in order to convince women to let them grope them. Honestly, on any given night at least 10 – 15 gays will have gravitated to Becks tatas for a little nuzzle

Numero Two Perez isn’t gay. He’s a faggot. And you’re right, faggots have no clue as to what fashion is so he should probably just shut the fuck up and continue wearing his Ed Hardy everything. Ick, I hope he’s not at Fashion Week. He just makes the tents smell like failed actor, bad gay porn and Jergens.

P.S. Everyone has stopped shopping The Gap, right?

LINK LOVE: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/nymag/fashion/~3/Pm8bonyZ9Qc/tracie_egan_blames_gay_men_for.html

That’s right indies, in case you haven’t heard, Perez Hilton launched his own fashion site (cocoperez.com)

What do you think about this? Do you think Perez has the capabilities of telling us already fashionable how to dress? It’s claimed to just be a celebrity style blog, but we are figuring soon enough Perez will try (and fail) to transform it into Fashion Indie because, well, we rule the internet when it comes to fashion.

Tell us what you think of this site. And the video that he wouldn’t give us the embed code to.

1. Amy Winehouse: Hot: For being a popular british singer, and bringing back the Beehive; Mess: For being a notorious drug addict and alcoholic, having unnattractive teeth, and eating disorders, ect.

2. Trace Cyrus: Hot: For being the Lead singer of Metro Station, being Miley Cyrus’ big brother; Mess: For being the Lead singer of Metro Station, His face, Twitter-Dating / Twitter-Breaking up with Demi Lovato, Whispery-Rapist voice.

3. Pete Wentz: Hot: For being the bassist of Fall Out Boy, Ashlee Simpsons hubby, & being the owner of Clandestine Industries, Crush Management, and Decaydance Records, OH. And his guyliner; Mess: For leaking n00dz, having random panic attacks against the press & for supporting The Millionaires.

4. Gabe Saporta: Hot: For being the lead singer of Cobra Starship, and having hypnotizing hips; Mess: For deciding to manage and support a band called Millionaires.

5. Jeffree Star: Hot: For being known everywhere; Mess: For scaring small children, creating Scene kids, ect.

6. Lily Allen: Hot: For her self confidence and clever song writing skills; Mess: For flashing, and fashion faux-pas

7. Guy Ripley: Hot: For his accent; Mess: For stalking Cobra Starship / William Beckett a little too much.

8. Ryan Ross: Hot: For once being loved for his Rose Vest and peacock hairdo; also being the cute guitarist backup singer for Panic(!) At The Disco; Mess: For completely changing the sound of PATD into a Beatles-esque band, then quitting said band. As well as a random and misleading marriage.

9. Ronnie Radke: Hot: Known for singing ‘Situations’; Mess: For being put in the slammer, due to assault charges.

10. (And my favorite) Perez Hilton: Hot: *Original* Founder of Multicolored Hair trend; Mess: Bad mouths and whines; And can’t take a punch.

Thank you Eleven Past Eleven, thank you.

I hate this so much. I am not even going to write any more because I don’t want to look at this longer.

LINK LOVE: Perez Hilton

If you haven’t seen the Perez video, here it is (Perez TV doesn’t have embed codes?)

Too soon?

SOURCE: Popcrunch

Here’s the rundown. Will.i.am told Perez Hilton he’s a douchebag for writing shit about Fergie. Perez called the “thug” a “faggot”. Someone hit Perez Hilton. Perez bitches about it on his site.

Why in the hell does Perez Hilton get invited into things, especially since he just talks shit about just about everyone? Hollywood, rally against this dude, seriously. DON’T LET HIM GO TO YOUR PARTIES!! He’s a parasite and completely useless. Can we get the community around this? Will.I.AM can you tell all your friends to nota show up to events if he’s there? That should just about get rid of this dude, right?

Good job using “Faggot” and “Gay” as a negative term douche, you continue to successfully set your community back,  you deserved the bashing. Seriously.

Someone should consider finishing this. I’m sure The Black Eyed Peas will pay for his ass to get beat. Actually, I’d pay for that. I got $10 bucks, who wants it…

Perez tried to rock the hair bow and failed miserably…why doesn’t it match his hair color? Doesn’t that defeat the point?

I think they’re a lesson to be learned here: only Lady Gaga can wear what Lady Gaga wears!!!

LINKAGE: Perez Hilton

Gap is currently running their new Vote for _. campaign, which consists of celebrities saying what they are voting for. Despite the fact that Perez Hilton is in this and is reason enough for me to not buy this crap, they are also opening a pointless store on 5th ave. where people can go to get their shirts customized. I would rather scribble it in myself then have to pay even more for this stupid shirt. Say what you will about the new presidents and debates and what not, but I’m sick of it. Can’t we just be done with it already?

Thanks to Youtube for the videos

It seems that last night’s Video Music Awards were more of a nightmare than bedtime entertainment. If the Disney prepubescent boys didn’t make your ears bleed and the fact that Britney Spears took home three awards didn’t make you check into a psych-ward, then surely the evening’s worst dressed stars made you claw your eyes out. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the 2008 VMA’s take the cake for having some of the worst dressed stars on live television. 

Here is a brief recap…I think the photos do more justice than any description will:

Christina Aguilera- It looks like you are wearing a trashy, spider web inspired Halloween costume. “I am beautiful, no matter what they say”…keep telling yourself that sweetheart.

Ashley Tisdale- sparkly and glittery, oh yes…but it looks like you robbed some girl at her junior prom.

Lindsay Lohan- next time pick something that is figure flattering, doesn’t pucker and preserves your youth. I didn’t know that 22 was the new 58.

Lady Victoria Hervey- The Niagara Falls Butterfly Conservatory called. They want their butterflies back. All of them.

…And last but not least, Perez Hilton, leave the fashion commentary up to people who don’t steal from their local Salvation Army.

Thanks Jezebel!

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 07: Singer Christina Aguilera arrives at the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards at Paramount Pictures Studios on September 7, 2008 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 07: Actress Ashley Tisdale arrives at the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards at Paramount Pictures Studios on September 7, 2008 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 07: Actress Ashley Tisdale arrives at the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards at Paramount Pictures Studios on September 7, 2008 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 07: Singer Lindsay Lohan arrives at the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards at Paramount Pictures Studios on September 7, 2008 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 07: Lady Victoria Harvey arrives at the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards at Paramount Pictures Studios on September 7, 2008 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

LOS ANGELES, CA - SEPTEMBER 07: Gossip blogger Perez Hilton arrives at the 2008 MTV Video Music Awards at Paramount Pictures Studios on September 7, 2008 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

“I’d go into fashion design full-time, which I’ve already begun. I just came out with my line for Hot Topic. And I’d be happy having a talk show. If Jay Leno moves to Fox, they’re going to need someone to take his spot!”

I think I just heard Daniel’s head explode!

Quite possibly the lowest blow ever taken on a campaign trail.  Obama is compared to Britney Spears and Paris Hilton in this pro-McCain ad. So basically, McCain wants you to believe that Obama is a vapid, self-absorbed camera hound, who lacks any credibility and at any day may shave his head, marry a back-up dancer, or worse… release a sex tape!!!

That’s pretty low Grandpa McCain. I’m totally working on a video to compare you to Perez Hilton, the only being in Hollywood lower than the Paris-ite.

Well Perez Hilton will be happy, his line will no longer be the worst clothing launch of all time after Aubrey O’day from Danity Kane launches her t-shirt line Heart On My Sleeve. So what’s more disgusting in the above picture, her pit stains or her face? Aubrey O’Day will be selling her line on the Heart On My Sleeve official website, but I give it a week or so before they are beggin Hot Topic to sell it for them. If they want to be sucessful I recommend buying plain white t-shirts and just have Aubrey press her face caked in make-up on it, that would be a pretty cool design and it would possibly make her pretty again. So for my words of wisdom for the day for all you women out there, don’t over do the make-up and don’t design shitty t-shirt lines.

Guns have been making more and more appearences in the fashion scene as of late. The first big sighting was the Chanel shoes with the gun shaped heel, and now Dolce and Gabana is featuring a pistol on the center of a sweater in their runway show. Rogue Status has developed a streetwear empire based on their military influenced print. And who could forget the designer gun show from earlier in the year. However just because you have guns on your clothes doesn’t guarentee success. Take for example Perez Hilton who holds the record for most embarassing clothing release of all time.

Scenes from happier days with Perez Hilton, you know when his collection didn’t crash and burn. I’m sure there is a Hot Topic exec kicking himself in the ass right now for picking up that phone call.

Yeah, one graphic on t-shirts, bags and flip flops and these glasses by Kanye West.

By now we all know about Perez Hilton’s clothing line. The collection that included blog flip flops appears to be a major flop.  Perez Hilton decided to make an appearance at an LA Hot Topic to great his fans and sell some goods.  Apparently, no one came. An employee from the store reported what really went down the day of the event.

ONLY 7 people showed up. SEVEN.That’s it. Mario was BEYOND upset texting and DEMENDING the right water, food, ETC he was a rude royal pain in the ass and BEYOND crass… My manager was trying to get people to come in to meet Perez by handing out $5 gift cards NO ONE WANTED TO MEET HIM! …he left around 8:45PM without saying goodbye to anyone & looked like he had been crying like the little bitch he is. We sold a grand total of $6.45 of Perez Hilton items between 6PM – 9PM. My manager has already talked about discounting his ‘line’ !”

This is seriously the greatest story I’ve written, ever. I’ve never felt so great reporting on a story.

Seriously, Hot Topic?  Did you honestly think this line would sell?  You’re regular customer is a self hating emo kid who thinks they are being “different” by wearing you mass produced goods. The idea that a middle aged doucher who mainly talks to sad housewives and chubby gays looking for a midday break from their work day could create a collection your customers might buy is idiotic. I hope a shit load of people get fired at Hot Topic this week.

Also, if anyone has video of Perez Hilton crying at Hot Topic or his appearance there, I want it. It’s totally the new porno.

Perez Hilton is releasing a line with Hot Topic. Metromix met up with the blogger to talk about his new line. He basically bashed Lauren Conrad’s collection and says his is better cause it’s wearable and cheap (also see made my Chinese children in sweatshops). Alright, I won’t suddenly proclaim my love for Lauren’s trash, but it’s surely better than this fucking shit pile of steaming vomit inducing hoodies and accessories.

I especially enjoy the idea that he believes that people will want to wear his collection cause it defines what his readers want.  If this is true then Perez’s audience is filled with idiotic TRL watching 16 year olds from the 1990′s.

Included in the mix of “fashions” are rubber bands and notebooks.  Oh god, this has got to be the worst thing to ever happen in the world of collaborations. Hot Topic, listen up, drop this line before it causes even more people to turn their back on your collections. Hire a real designer to revitalize your currently shitty offering and get off the Perez bandwagon.

If you need it, I can make a list of about a dozen indies out there who can do a better job than Perez’s half assed attempt at fashion.

You too can look like this. I bet you’re excited. 

Oh, God! First the Paris Hilton Doll and now this.

Further proving that Hot Topic is the least relevant of fast retailers, the chain of mall stores (I believe they only exist in Middle America) are signing on gossip columnist/posterboy for late term abortions, Perez Hilton, for a collection of shitty tees, flip-flops and other completely undesirable items for their creatively titled “Perez Hilton for Hot Topic” line.  The collection will include Perezcious Pink and Gossip Gangster inspired items.

“It seems natural to make products that my readers will love and hopefully some guys will rock it too,” Perez said in a statement on Tuesday. “Some people might even call me a perfectionist (such perfection in drawing coke lines on celebrity pictures), well that person would be me! I’m very passionate about my brand. I have extremely high standards and I like to get my hands dirty!”“I’m most excited to finally see on the shelves products that are good and affordable for my readers. I actively sought out Hot Topic for that reason.”

“I keep seeing these lines from the likes of Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag that give me nightmares,” he says. “My brand will be very conscious of my audience.”

Hears a little SAT prep for you. Lauren Conrad’s fashion line is to nightmares, as Perez Hilton’s fashion line is to _______ .

If you said “being gang raped by a pack of wild, rabies infected gibbons covered in month old fecal mater and then taking a sawed off shotgun to the forehead when you discover two weeks later you are pregnant with one of their demon spawn, oh yeah, and you’re a man” then you are correct.

I know none of the readers of this site would be caught dead in a Hot Topic (and that’s why we love you) but it is extremely important to encourage others to stay farther away from this collection than you would from Perez’s downwind. A mean breath of this collection may lead people to think you’re a flamingly gay, ignorant failed actor with homophobic tendencies and bad hair who wishes for a day when his penis isn’t lodged between two massive rolls of fat.

Stay away from this like the plague. It wouldn’t even be funny if you bought the collection to be “ironic”. A sale is a sale and Perez Hilton is not smart enough to realize when people are buying his stuff to be dicks.

“Hi Gals! That was so fantastic when you suggested that we really start getting acquainted. Hi, Jezebels! My name is Perez Hilton. Now, before you go any farther, you should know that that is a french name and it’s pronounced “Pa-RAY Heel-TONE.” I have to do that with everyone I meet because when you are descended from Joan of Freaking Arc (pardon my french!), it’s important to set people straight. Don’t you just love the Internet? Anyways, for the record, my dress size is a 27D and my shoe size is a 16 and a half. Who says that the french are all petities? At least here in Illinois we proud descendants of the french come in all shapes and sizes. Take that picture I am enclosing. I am a proud Lady of Size who is not afraid to declare my feminine features. Fat and happy, that’s me. Except when I am partying with my friends Dr. Peppers, Red Bulls, and Cheetos. Then I’m not so happy because I know it’s going to catch up with me later. Dutch oven style, if you know

what I mean. Love you, love your new Site! Perez “Puffy” Hilton.”

Who’s the prettiest tranny in the world?

Fashion was never meant to be safe.

It’s destructive and meant specifically for the .01% of the population that can maintain a size two frame, spend over an hour on hair and make-up and spend thousands on couture.  This is why I’m in love with Paris Vogue’s refusal to play it safe by featuring a smoking hot Kate Moss taking puffs from a CIGARETTE!!!  Yes, the sensor society of America has no say on what happens in the pages of magazines across the Atlantic, which is why this version of Vogue is so much more potent than Anna’s monthly love letter to Cosmopolitan.

Not everyone agrees with the smoking gun that is Moss’s spread. Gossip mongered Perez Hilton (aka the best reason to endorse late term abortions) feels that Kate’s spread is “Icky Icky Poo” (his words, not mine) and that Kate should put down the Parliaments (cause they cause cancer) and retire.

Last time I checked Perezy, shoving fistfuls of chocolate cake down your glutenous trap causes just as much damage to your body as an occasional smoke.  Get off your fucking high horse and jog, you fat bastard.

I swear this video is a timeline of Perez Hilton getting fatter and fatter. Take a second away from the computer buddy and jump on a treadmill.

In other news, the gossiper we most love to hate on just hit Page 6 of the Post. Apparently he asked some 24 year old blogger to send him nude picts and videos of him “doing his thing”. The blogger Jonathan Jaxson of JJ’s Dirt said he had approached Perez for advice on building blog traffic and then promised to send picts in exchange for links. Yes, this is what the world of gossip is all about, trading sexual favors for online coverage. Guess it can’t be as bad as trading coke for cover girls, but it’s pretty skevie nonetheless.

His look says “I’m a fat and useless tool.”

I cannot stress enough my complete dislike for the distasteful style of gossip blogger, Perez Hilton. I’ve tried long and hard to find some redeeming factors of Perez but I am just unable to find it. His blatant disregard for any sort of aesthetically sound apparel and continued exploitation of my pupils with his ultra violet hair has pushed me beyond the limit. It’s too late to turn back, cause this chico is getting bashed.

I really did try to like him. Honestly. I’ve met the portly computer monkey on more than one occassion, most recently a the MAC Trendspot at Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week where the lard ass was blogging, wait for it, ABOUT FASHION!!! DO NOT THINK YOU CAN INVADE ON THE TERRITORY OF FASHION BLOGGERS PEREZ!!! We fashion bloggers are a very dedicated bunch of writers and most of us hold ourselves in respectable positions in which our opinions reach out to discerning readers. We don’t play etch-a-sketch with photos and pride ourselves on how idiotic we can look. Enough is enough Mr. Hilton. I refuse to endorse any fashion brand or beauty product that chooses to endorse the long lost love child of Rainbow Bright and Cheif Wiggums from the Simpsons.

If you have any love of fashion (or if you’re just looking to hate on someone) please join me on my fight against Perez Hilton’s foray into fashion. BOYCOTT ANY FASHION OR BEAUTY COMPANIES THAT ENDORSE THIS MANCHILD.

Perez, you can have the Britney’s and Winehouse’s of the world, just leave Kate Moss to us.

Perez Hilton