SIMON’S TIPS:

Tip Number 1: Wearing insane makeup, crazy garish accessories, and demented outfits to fashion week is a really horrible idea… unless you want to get your picture taken continuously and have a wild and fabulous time.

Tip Number 2: Think you might have what it takes to be a supermodel?  There’s only one way to find out: hop on the runway for the finale and start working all your angles!

Tip Number 3: Hated the show but not sure what to say?  Simply barge backstage, air kiss the designer and shout, “You’ve done it again!”  It works either way.

Tip Number 4: Bring buckets of food.  If they eat hot dogs at football games there’s no reason why you cannot scarf down a tuna-melt at a fashion show.

Tip Number 5: If you are enjoying the music at a show feel free to sing along loudly…and bust a move.

Also, be sure to check the amazing window displays at W Hotel in Union Square location that Simon Doonan designed himself! I know this seems a bit overwhelming, but W guests in cities where there are Barneys locations will receive exclusive perks! Complimentary bellinis and discounts will be given when they shop at Barneys New York and Barneys Co Op stores through October.

For more on all the amazing deals check out the W Hotel website!

According to Simon Doonan, Jenna Jameson  shops so much in Scottsdale, NY she’s got her own parking spot at the Fashion Square mall.

EVENTS
• Meet Stella McCartney when she stops by Barneys New York to show off her fall 2009 collection. She’ll also have an informal Q&A session with Simon Doonan. 660 Madison Ave., at 61st St. (212-826-8900); 1?3.

• Stella McCartney’s exclusive collection for Net-a-Porter.com launches today. Online only.

• Def Jam artist Chrisette Michele stops by Sephora Fifth Avenue to celebrate her new album, Epiphany. 597 Fifth Ave., at 48th St. (212-980-6534); 7?9.

SALES
STARTING TODAY
• Buy a makeover package for $185 at Kimara Ahnert, and get a free one good for the Mother-Daughter makeover special. Or buy a facial for $130 and get a free lesson with a makeup artist (worth $185). Through 5/9. Kimara Ahnert, 1113 Madison Ave., nr. 84th St. (212-452-4252); M?S (10?7), Su (1?5). Call or stop in and mention the Mother’s Day special.

• Cotton shirts by Italian men’s brand Domenico Vacca used to be $590, but are only $159 at the designer sample sale. Pants that were $780 are now $140, and silk shirts that used to be $790 are now $230. Through 5/7. 14 E. 60th St., nr. Madison Ave., Ste. 900 (212-920-1211); daily (10?6).

STARTING TOMORROW
• At the Daryl K and Kerrigan trunk show, pre-order the fall 2009 collections for 20 percent off and shop the spring 2009 collection for up to 25 percent off. One day only. 21 Bond St., at Bleecker St. (212-529-8790); 11?8. Wine reception: 4?8.

• Betsey Johnson evening dresses are $75, day dresses are $50, and sportswear is $35 at the designer’s sample sale. Through 5/8. Millennium Broadway Hotel, 145 W. 44th St., nr. Broadway, sixth fl. (212-789-7546); daily (10?8).

• Katy Rodriguez’s spring 2009 collection is 20 percent off at her trunk show at Resurrection NY. Meet Katy on Thursday, May 7, when she stops by to show you the collection herself. Through 5/9. 217 Mott St., nr Spring St. (212-625-1374); daily (11?7). Appearance: 2?7.

• Delman’s spring collection of shoes is up to 75 percent off. Sandals, gladiators, ballet flats, and more are $89 to $109 (snakeskin heels were $365, but are now $109). Through 5/8. 145 W. 18th St., nr. Seventh Ave.; W, Th (10?7), F (10?3).

• Shoes, clothing, and handbags by Loeffler Randall are up to 50 percent off. Prices start at $125 for flats and sandals, $78 for clothing, and $80 for handbags. Through 5/9. 525 Broadway, at Spring St., Ste. 202; W, T, F (10?7), S (11?6).

• Rebecca Minkoff bags are over 50 percent off at the designer’s sample sale. Also find marked-down summer dresses and retro-styled suits by Abaeté. Through 5/10. 33 W. 17th St., nr. Sixth Ave.; daily (10?8).

ONGOING
• The 2008 resort collection by 3.1 phillip lim is up to 40 percent off while supplies last. Ongoing. 115 Mercer St., nr. Prince St. (212-334-1160); M–S (11?7), Su (noon?6).

LINKAGE: NY MAG

The British designer is hosting a Fall 09 trunk show at Barneys’ Madison Avenue store on Tue May 5th. In between browsing the collection, Simon Doonan will host a Q&A with Stella that promises to be a “must-see repartee.” The whole thing lasts from 1 to 3 but Simon will ask his first question at promptly 1:30. Be there to meet her at person, or at a close glance.

“Every trend has a sell-by date, and the fake tan thing definitely expired this year.”

Simon Doonan, in The Times.

Who do you think we have to thank for this? Twilight, winter, or good ol’ common sense?

Simon Doonan took a moment to encourage all in attendance at todays Barneys/ Volkswagen breakfast to pay attention to the quickly fading gay rights which continue to slip a way.

All were encouraged to attend todays protest at the Morman Masonic Temple.

Will Go Gay be the new Go Green?

This morning the kind folks at Volkswagen were kind enough to pick me up at my massive abode in the Upper, Upper East Side (a.k.a the Bronx). Currently Im sitting at breakfast with creative genius Simon Doonan at Barneys Fred restaurant. In love with the new wagen. And very sad to dish on the bitter end of Simons column for Vogue. Yet another casualty of the new antiglossy economy.

The beloved Simon Doonan, creative director at Barney’s, is getting married! The self proclaimed fashionista will wed interior designer and Top Design judge  Jonathan Adler. The ceremony will take place in California. Although the ceremony is a joyous occasion, Doonan says that Adler is already his spouse unofficially and getting married “is more like paying a parking ticket.” He assures his fans that the event will take place after the main event: New York Fashion Week. Congrats Simon!