•  
• 

Anna Wintour is sick of all these singing whippersnappers cavorting around with rock stars and throwing up in Paris Hilton’s closet. She’s attempted to make it clear that Vogue’s readers aren’t pop-burlesque girls, but women. Good job alienating young consumers, I’m sure your current readership will live forever.

The official statement is straight out of the July issue of Vogue. In an article titled “I Am Woman” (sly steal from Sex and the City 2), the magazine attempts to define it’s values stating they aren’t for the pop artists and “PASSÉ MORNING-AFTER CHIC” but instead for women who trade stock’s on Wall Street (have you seen a female trader, total bulls).

Hear me roar. Hear me issue stock-purchase orders from the Wall Street trading floor. I am woman; I am not girl. I do not emulate the pop-burlesque fashion stylings of Ke$ha or Katy Perry. I do not aspire to PASSÉ MORNING-AFTER CHIC, with bird’s-nest hair and shredded leather leggings. No. Of Lana Turner and Barbara Stanwyck — and Lena Horne — I sing.

(Have you felt the smooth, snug tug of fine leather gloves being pulled on? Have you considered the REBELLION, the nonconformity, inherent today in a Marnie Eisenhower knit suit? Have you worn a crinoline lately?)

Reader, if you’re older than fourteen, fashion for fall 2010 offers more WEARABLE OPTIONS than it has in eons. Skirts fall below mid-thigh. Designers are giving us dead-cool-but-still-practical STREETWEAR UNIFORMS for work or school. Black-with-black is totally back.

Can we get an “Amen” up in here?

Personally, I think it’s great that Vogue is finally attempting to differentiate itself from the dominant Elle Magazine.

Knowing now that Vogue is more interested in older women with careers and real life experience ensures that anyone younger than 30 can focus their attention on titles more in-tune with their lifestyle, like Nylon or FashionIndie.com, cause hell, those are the magazines for girls who get laid, love to dress like famous young singers and have no idea who the fuck Marnie Eisenhower is or what’s a knit suit.

Of course, you have to wonder if this means Vogue will stop featuring spreads of ultra thin, 16 year old models and finally embrace the women they claim to care about?

Can we get a “WTF” up in here?????