Fashion Indie


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Uhhhhhh Andre, I’m Gonna Say No!

Why is it that every rapper with a modicum of celebrity feels that they automatically should become a quote un-quote designer. Now regardless of the fact that Andre 3000 is a highly successful artist,  his track record in the style department is more like a criminal record at Rykers and some body’s gettin gang-banged in the yard.

However, bein’ the gentle soul that I am *crickets*, I always give everyone a chance to prove that they will fail………wait, lemme try that again.  Even tho’ I keep a positive mind-set until people make a complete fool of themselves………..mm-mm, that’s not it either.  Let’s try something totally different.  Andre 3000 is crazier than a soup sandwich, therefore expect his line to reflect that state of mind.

I’m really just a douchebag that enjoys thinking up the best cracks that I can put into a post, cuz honestly,  Andre’s kinda serious about this.  He’s funded the whole line himself, gotten advice from Anna Wintour, and sketched the clothes all by himself.  The collection, Benjamin Bixby, is inspired by 1930′s style with collegiate sweater jackets, fedoras, waistcoats, riding boots and other things your great grand daddy donated to the Goodwill.  Here’s to Andre doing something different I just hope this isn’t one of the pieces:

I actually really love Andre, but he’s still 2 scoops of ‘taters short of a family bucket at KFC.

-Z’maji, The Glam’Rist

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A Cool Sip Of I Don’t Give A Shart For Cory Kennedy

Styled by Zmaji Robinson

Indies,  please stop gettin all excited and soiling yourselves over every waif that shows up at some shindig lookin like a 3rd world malaria victim.  Cory Kennedy? What has she done that’s so friggin special? C’mon?  Some photog with to much free time took a few pics of her…….she had a few to many pills and danced on a table……..she vomited on Marc Jacobs at a potluck, WHAT?!?!  Does dressin like you just got accosted in an alley at gun point automatically make you a fashionista now-a-days?

I mean the lunacy is spreadin’ like a venereal disease at the Hilton what with Gawker calling her the “Internet It Girl”,  Nylon Magazine goin ape-ass crazy and doin a shoot of her, even New York Magazine and L.A. Times have lost all sense of intelligence and mentioned her for……..for……..um………….well exactly.

Since Daniel has issued a mandate that we boycott any and every idiot that would endorse Perez Hilton ((MOOOO!!!)), I think we should do the same for Miss Cory, until she actually does something that we can know her for instead of random pics of her doin crap while lookin a homeless, hungover mess.  I know, I’ll bring a can of gasoline, everybody else bring a copy of her Nylon shoot for tender and we’ll burn her in effigy.

For those that agree send your hate mail here: http://www.uber.com/corykennedy

                              here: http://corykennedy.blogspot.com/

                        and here: http://www.myspace.com/cklckl

P.S.  And Another Thing,  it don’t make no sense to let yo’ hair look like a gaggle of flyin rats live in it,  especially when a bottle of ‘Head & Shoulders’ cost only 7 bucks……fashionista?! PLEAZE, fashionista these nutz!!!

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Chloe Sevigny Bores Indies

Styled by Saynt

Okay, so I might just be hating on Chloe Sevigny, but this look is ridiculous on her. The shapeless grey sack cloth dress, the lack of accessories, the bad hair and uncoordinated make-up. Contact the Fug Girls cause this look belongs on their list.

Chloe, you’re a (self proclaimed) fashion “icon” now. Can you please put a little more effort into your look so the rest of us don’t throw a fit when you walk into the party of a “real” designer (in this case Miuccia Prada)?  We never choose you to represent indie culture, but since the rest of the world feels you do, can you not make the rest of us look so lazy?

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When Reality “Stars” Go Over Their 15 Minutes

Styled by Zmaji Robinson

Like our Faberlours leader Daniel Saynt,  I’m sickened at the news of Lauren Conrad showing at L.A. Fashion Week, but that’s not sayin’ much seeing that L.A.’s fashion week usually sucks ballz.  It’s just a sick chemo-therapeutic mess cuz apparently Lauren didn’t get the memo that it was over.  She instead decided to waste the last few seconds of her ’15′ puttin’ out a “fashion” line that she ripped off of rejected leftovers from The Gap.  Poor Poo!  She thought we actually cared about her 2nd rate goods.

Boo,  we didn’t watch you and your fellow spoiled brats on that silly “Laguna Beach” or “The Hills” and we definitely ain’t buying your flimsy, craft-store,  home-economics, flea market “chic” crap.  Especially for those ridiculous prices, just so you can buy yourself some more Kobe beef at Mr. Chows when all you’re really gonna do is throw it up laterz anyway.  C’mon Sweetie,  get your head outta your crapper and look at what you’ve done……..you don’t feel that…….YOU DON’T BELIEVE IN THAT!!!

Of course she’s just a face for some cash-whore company that wants to sell some trash to the spoiled little gremlins that watched her make a fool of herself on TV and are aspiring to be that much of an idiot,  poor children.  Also m’love, just so you know,  If you’re showing at L.A. Fashion Week,  I’ll be in the front row with a bucket of red paint……….and you’re not even using fur.  That’ll teach yo’ ass.

-Z’maji, The Glam’rist

Paris Hilton: TRASH!?!

Styled by Zmaji Robinson

Yea, um, I know that we [Fashion Indie] weren’t gonna mention Paris Hilton’s ass no’more but I’m pissed so get over it. It just won’t stop, will it?!?! No one wanted to buy her piss water perfume. No one wanted her whack CD and apparently not only are “The Stars Blind” their also tone deaf. Now this girl wants us to buy knock off knock offs that were probably made in a sweat shop that would make Kathy Lee Giffords 3rd world labor debacle look like a soiree at the Russian Tea Room.

Paris Hilton Footwear is for the fashion-forward young woman who wants to look and feel great from head-to-toe, without spending a fortune. -Paris Hilton

BISH PLEASE!!!

When you come correct with a shoe like Louboutin or Alex McQueen then we might actually try to forget how much WE DESPISE YOUR VERY EXISTENCE so I’ll thank you to stop peddlin’ your shitty wares to the masses the same way you peddle your snatch….FREELY!!!

ok….I’m done…..

-Z’maji The Glam’rist

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Perez Hilton Get’s Caught With His Pants Down

Styled by Saynt

[youtube]http://youtube.com/watch?v=MouLZThTJgc[/youtube]

I swear this video is a timeline of Perez Hilton getting fatter and fatter. Take a second away from the computer buddy and jump on a treadmill.

In other news, the gossiper we most love to hate on just hit Page 6 of the Post. Apparently he asked some 24 year old blogger to send him nude picts and videos of him “doing his thing”. The blogger Jonathan Jaxson of JJ’s Dirt said he had approached Perez for advice on building blog traffic and then promised to send picts in exchange for links. Yes, this is what the world of gossip is all about, trading sexual favors for online coverage. Guess it can’t be as bad as trading coke for cover girls, but it’s pretty skevie nonetheless.

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I Can Be A Fashionista Now? – Chloe Sevigny

Styled by Zmaji Robinson

Everyone has heard that Chloe Sevigny is put out her own “fashion” line, and now it’s hitting stores. Yea, so just in case you didn’t already have enough trash in your garbage receptacle, ol’ Chloes got whatcha need. Oh Chloe……..Chloe, Chloe, Chloe…….Listen Boo, just becuz some post-op tranny says you looked cute in some little dress that he….she…..IT! stitched together in between snorts of blow, doesn’t mean that you are now a fashion Icon. I don’t care if every ankle grabbin queen this side of the rainbow says you’re fierce, a fashion icon does not a compliment make.

Sugar, IMAN, is a fashion ICON and even SHE hasn’t put out a line……..so puh-lease, remove yourself from the race……you’re racing with a square wheel anyways.

Everything looks cheap to me, no sign of elegance or even a cohesive direction. I mean the prints and shapes aren’t anything special((I’ve seen the lookbook)) and I know that you and ‘them peoples’ over at Opening Ceremony are gonna charge college tuition-like prices for a some cheap tank top that won’t hold up under the strain of the delicate cycle and a heavy dousin’ of Woolite. Girl please!!!

What’s really cookin’ my bacon((turkey bacon, cuz pigs are filthy…..but sooo delicious)) is these people that put out a line just cuz they want to be seen as a fashionista or to make some money and instead of them giving the fashion community something fresh and new or at least their honest point of view, they do some crap and slap their name on it in for the wannabes who will buy it in hopes of being FASHION FORWARD. I mean you can have my cash if you give me something that will be an asset to my wardrobe, C’mon!!!

WHY! is it that every little actress with an eating disorder that makes a movie and has that disheveled “I don’t bathe” look, is automatically put on some pedestal as if she’s the second coming of Twiggy. ‘BISH’ PLEASE. My great grandmother rocks her duds better than you………and that ol’ girl is dead and gone, sippin that Pina Colada with Jesus.

Though we here at Fashion Indie are not pleased with Chloe’s venture into fashion, we don’t hate her………….THESE PEOPLE HOWEVER DESPISE HER EXISTENCE http://gofugyourself.typepad.com/go_fug_yourself/chloe_sevigny/

-Z’maji The Glam’rist

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THE BASHED : Soulja Boy Shoes

Styled by Saynt

Souja Boy Shoes – The Video

I can’t understand a thing he says but he’s now the second riches teen in the world (second only to Miley Cyrus). Really, a Souja Boy sneaker. I can’t even comment. I pray every one buys these so that I know who to make fun of on the subway.

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BOYCOTT ANY FASHION OR BEAUTY COMPANY THAT SUPPORTS PEREZ HILTON!!!

Styled by Saynt

His look says “I’m a fat and useless tool.”

 

I cannot stress enough my complete dislike for the distasteful style of gossip blogger, Perez Hilton. I’ve tried long and hard to find some redeeming factors of Perez but I am just unable to find it. His blatant disregard for any sort of aesthetically sound apparel and continued exploitation of my pupils with his ultra violet hair has pushed me beyond the limit. It’s too late to turn back, cause this chico is getting bashed.

I really did try to like him. Honestly. I’ve met the portly computer monkey on more than one occassion, most recently a the MAC Trendspot at Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week where the lard ass was blogging, wait for it, ABOUT FASHION!!! DO NOT THINK YOU CAN INVADE ON THE TERRITORY OF FASHION BLOGGERS PEREZ!!! We fashion bloggers are a very dedicated bunch of writers and most of us hold ourselves in respectable positions in which our opinions reach out to discerning readers. We don’t play etch-a-sketch with photos and pride ourselves on how idiotic we can look. Enough is enough Mr. Hilton. I refuse to endorse any fashion brand or beauty product that chooses to endorse the long lost love child of Rainbow Bright and Cheif Wiggums from the Simpsons.

If you have any love of fashion (or if you’re just looking to hate on someone) please join me on my fight against Perez Hilton’s foray into fashion. BOYCOTT ANY FASHION OR BEAUTY COMPANIES THAT ENDORSE THIS MANCHILD.

Perez, you can have the Britney’s and Winehouse’s of the world, just leave Kate Moss to us.

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Clipse Joins the Rappers With Clothing Lines List

Styled by Saynt

File this under: Oversaturated, but the Clipse (the rap duo that came out with the song “I’m So Krispy”, ah the title makes sense now) is coming out with a clothing label. Guess they finally wised up and decided to follow in the footsteps of Jay-Z (Rocafella), G-Unit (G-Unit Clothing), Eminem (Shady), Diddy (Sean John), Pharell (Billionaire Boys Club), Nelly (Apple Bottoms), Andre Benjamin (who knows???) and Kanye (Pastelle). Glad you finally made it to the foray boys. The collection is filled the “usual suspect” streetwear and will add more items, such as jeans, to its repertoire in the near future. For more on the rapper/designer (a.k.a. thank god for licensing deals cause no records are selling) check below.

Pastelle [by Kanye West]

If one day you’re known from dressing like Carlton Banks and the next looking like a cast member from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, then no matter what you release from your line, your audience is going to be disappointed.

Pastelle may be the most polarizing label when it drops; it may be too out there for the conventional shoppers or too mainstream for the fashionista crowd. And anyone in the middle won’t trip, as Ralph Lauren & co already satisfies their wardrobe conundrums.

Plus, imagine the awkwardness of telling a girl that the sweater you’re wearing is from a label called Pastelle. You may as well tell her that you were born without a penis.

Eight 732 [by Young Jeezy]

After only dropping two albums, Young Jeezy decided that he may as well have his own line. Originally it was called U.S.D.A., after Jeezy’s click, but since the real USDA [the ones who inspect meat (nullus)] weren’t about to have their named soiled by Snowman, he had it changed to Eight 732, the letters that correspond the letters U-S-D-A on a standard telephone keypad.

You can’t make this stuff up. Trust us, we’ve tried.

Todd Smith [by LL Cool J]

Ladies may Love Cool James, but dudes probably won’t like his style. Sure, LL is the same guy that helped FUBU pop back in the day but considering that he’s not only about 20 years late to the rapper-wear game and is known more for having his shirt off than on, the likelihood of Todd Smith becoming the next Sean John is as slim as Immortal Technique having the number one video on 106 & Park.

Or LL for that matter.

Foreign Money (mens) & Double U (womens) [both by Lil’ Wayne]

It’s common knowledge that Lil’ Wayne spends more time drinking cough syrup and getting arrested than he does writing rhymes, so what makes him think people are going to be checking for his clothing line?

While no one has any idea what any of it looks like, (or if they will ever actually exist now that he’s looking at an up north trip) we will say that naming his women’s line “Double U” may actually take the award for Worst Name For a Rapper’s Clothing Line away from Young Jeezy.

RoyElz [by Juelz Santana]

Come to think of it, Juelz Santana may be in the running for the award of Worst Name For a Rapper’s Clothing Line too.

Santana could have taken the easy route and come out with a line of signature bandannas, but instead took the easy route as he is looking to drop apparel. As Allhiphop.com puts it RoyElz,

…does not imitate Dipset Capo Jim Jones’ Nostic clothing line.

Nostic [by Jim Jones]

That’s right, Jim Jones has a clothing line, too. But that’s all we’re going to say about that.

We like our Kufis where they are, thank you very much.

Trillion and Truly [by Lupe Fiasco]

Out of all the rapper-wear out there, Lupe’s line could be the Superstar breakout star.

Think about it: he’s got the loyal fan base, understands the market (he did have a blog on Hypebeast after all) and would be working with some of the big guys in streetwear from Japan and the U.K. to release his line.

But with recent claims of “shooting TEC-9s when we were babies,” it seems that Trillion and Truly could be end up being more ARME x Baby Gap than Maharishi x W) Taps.

CEO [by Dame Dash]

Dame Dash may not be a rapper by definition, but you’ve heard him on more tracks than those two other guys in The Black Eyed Peas, so he gets a pass. After he split from the Roc-A-Fella Dynasty, he attempted to launch his own clothing line aptly named, CEO. Presumably it’s for the Chief Executive Officer in all of us.

Think of it as the hip-hop equivalent to the Donald J. Trump Signature suit collection.

Shady LTD [by Eminem]

When Shady LTD. debuted, Eminem was one of the – if not the biggest- selling rappers out.

However, when Shawn Carter rocked Rocawear and it flew off the shelves. When Marshall Mathers rocked Shady LTD. and it was a clear indication that nobody would ever take Detroit Fashion Week seriously.

Makaveli Branded [the estate of Tupac Shakur]

We’re not really sure how putting the late, great Tupac Shakur’s face on pair of jeans pays homage to his life and legacy, but then again we’re really not sure how even in death, he’s still managed to release more albums than Raekwon The Chef, so we’ll digress on this one.

Fetish [by Eve]

Right now, Fetish is currently on its third launch.

It takes NASA less attempts to launch a shuttle into space and they’re successful without having had a TV show, multi-platinum albums, Dr. Dre or being BFFs with Gwen Stefani.

If the clothing game didn’t work out twice thus far, it may be time to wrap it up and apply the Fetish name to something more fitting, like a line of whips, chains and gimp masks.

We’d keep this post going but there’s way too many rappers with clothing deals to list. Feel free to throw them in the comments.

[Hint: Fabolous, Busta Rhymes, DMX, Snoop Dogg, Master P, Foxy Brown, & Lil’ Kim have all had clothing lines. As you can imagine, they’ve been awesome.]

Courtesy of Satchel of Gravel

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They Let this Man Blog about Fashion?!?

Styled by Lauren Garroni

Over Fashion Week, MAC cosmetics paid gossip blogger extraordinarie Perez Hilton to blog live at their booth in Bryant Park. Here at Fashion Indie our only comment to this photo is: couldn’t they have given him some cover up?

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Post-Fashion Week at Tenjune: A Night to Forget

 

February 9, 2008. Day 1, post Fashion Week, and the parties continue. Tenjune is considered one of the hottest clubs in NYC (P. Diddy hosting his after party on Friday and Paris Hilton making out with Elijah Dushku) so stopping by on a Saturday night after a week of celebrating the most fabulous people that embody the city that is NY, should not be a disappointment by any means. After standing in the cold and screaming “Alex,” to anyone that would respond (the infamous door guy), we entered the mecca that is…Tenjune, unzipped our coats, showed off the ‘girls,’ and looked around.

 

 

Step one: find “brother” Jimmy and his table of cheap champaign and water bottles posing as liquor. Step two: take shelter next to 1 of 8 jersey girls who wear v-neck poly-blended sweaters as dresses and play arts and crafts with sequins and nylon to create “bras” for their saggy grandma tits that they think is some kind of asset to score some ass. I first met a pro football jock right out of college wearing a baseball cap, t-shirt, and ripped up jeans. While trying to comprehend the pronounciation of my name, he checked out the leggings on jersey girl no. 1. and the fake nails on jersey girl no. 2. He was pretty cool. I obviously had no game. I guess my outfit just didn’t scream easy, cheap slut enough.

Jersey Chicks over 30 + Dudes Who Still Think their Varsity Football Stats Matter + Over-priced, Watered Down Drinks = Saturday Nights at Tenjune

 

Amid the 30 something blonde in cow print boots and her cousin 5 ft away in a matching cow print dress, we start to scope the scene away from our table (god forbid we leave). We danced, laughed, and checked out the unattractive, undesirable species that surrounded us. How could such a hotspot breed all of this synthetic trash?Isn’t the sourpuss guy at the door (Alex) supposed to be in control of this department?

 

 

About one painful hour into our “exclusive” experience, the party actually started to take flight. The DJ was exceptionally talented given the unfortunate circumstances of a lame, ego enduced crowd. A false eye seemed to spot Will-I-Am looking for his posse, only to find the first of a handful of style coming through the door. The cool people meter starts fluctuating with socialites making a non-dramatic entrance into the club and then fading into the crowd just as fast. The few post-fashion week stragglers still struggling to make it out one more night are sporting off the shoulder, paisley print dresses, fedora hats, skinny ties with vests, and a plethora of skin.

For some brief fleeting moments our hopes lifted and the night didn’t seem like a total waste, our only saving grace seemed to hit the repeat button as more and more potentially interesting people tricked in, but then the music turned sour and so did the scene. It was time to call it a night and take on the identity of a cow (seems fitting at this point) in a heard of cattle to retrieve our coats.

Pretentious nerds, sleezy promoters, and sequins galore, we pondered the previous 2 hours. Finally, we came to 3 fair and rational conclusions: 1. a new promotional idea – “Saturday: all from across the Hudson welcome!” 2. find out the name the DJ and become his #1 fan 3. next time just go to The Box.

Author: A dear friend who chose to remain anonymous

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Sex & the City Spoiler Alert!!!

Styled by Saynt

 

 

Carrie discovers that none of her outfits work in the real world, so she becomes a Scientologist and wants for her transport to Xanadu.

 

 

 

 

Coming to the sad realization that they are no longer “hot, young things” the girls actually wait in line to go to a club. Samantha’s attempt to “blow” the door man fails when her dentures fall out.

 

 

 

 

Carrie goes brown, then red, then blonde all in an attempt to steal her girlfriends men, by stealing their hair color! Miranda realizes what’s going on a dyes her hair neon green before she tries stealing her stud muffin Steve.

 

 

 

In an desperate attempt to be married before 50, Carrie buys a wedding dress and tells Big, Adian, Burger, and the Russian to all come and meet her at the roof of her home. She stands on the ledge of her building and threatens to jump unless someone proposes. Miranda steps in and claims her love for her pint sized friend. They live happily ever after, except Samantha is no longer their friend cause she went “dyke” years ago, and felt these two we’re stealing her thunder.

With Samantha gone the girls quickly realize how tame their lives seem with out a hot older woman to guide them on their sexual adventures. No ones having sex, everyone’s married, and it’s all a happy ending, until [insert dramatic music here] Big decides he actually loves Carrie’s … long lost daughter. In a scene out of the final season of Ally McBeal, Carrie discovers one of the eggs she froze when she was 20 is now a full grown woman with a thing for older men. Big and Carrie 2.0 marry. Carrie 1.0 buys her first cat. Can’t wait for the sequal “Menopause in the City”.

 

P.S. Thank the lord for Gossip Girls!!! If we had to keep taking fashion cues from the over 30 set I might have to die.

(All Photos: People.com)

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