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Edited by on March 17 2011 at 5:45 PM

Matthew Williamson doesn’t get the Middleton mania — sounds like someone wasn’t asked to design her dress…; Model Jessica White will have her day in court after teaching a bitch on the street how to smize with a black eye; and it’s St. Patrick’s Day meaning I refuse to go outside until tomorrow afternoon.

Muse of the World: Matthew Williamson Is Totes O.V. Kate Middleton

- Matthew Williamson is British so for patriotism’s sake he should be all in for the royal wedding, but instead he’s all like, “Kate isn’t a fashion bunny. I don’t know why everyone in fashion is waiting to see what she wears. I’m, like, thinking: get over it.” He later added that the Queen was a frumpy old maid and he was “never really a fan.” [The Telegraph]

- Okay, I might consider braving the hoards of drunken, emerald-clad tourists if I had these shoes. They could certainly clear a path, leaving frat boys and sorority girls clutching at their feather boas while running in their pajama pants. [Refinery29]

- Karl Lagerfeld dusted off his sketch book to provide some drawings for a new edition of  Justine Picardie‘s biography on Coco Chanel. And notorious for his attention to detail, he used Coco’s blood for the ink. [WWD]

- Jessica White choked out a bear and donned its fur for her court date on Tuesday where she declined a plea deal, claiming there’s a video that exonerates her from guilt. And in said video, she’s giving both editorial and commercial as she pummels said bitch for taking her taxi. [Daily News]

- I don’t play basketball nor do I care for anyone who does, but I might make an exception for Armani. [Styleite]

- Anna Wintour‘s favorite dish is reportedly chicken pot pie. Of course the pie’s special ingredient is the ground-up bones of Vogue interns that acts as THE BEST diuretic. [The Cut]

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Story by Lester Brathwaite

I was center square from 1969 to 1978, during which I perfected the art of the zing as well as a crippling cocaine addiction. Bea Arthur was responsible for both. @LesFabian lester at fashionindie.com