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Edited by on April 25 2011 at 6:59 PM

- Dahlia Noir, Riccardo Tisci‘s first fragrance for Givenchy will be spritzed into stores this August, though the ad campaign starring go-to muse Mariacarla Boscono is already creating a stink. [The Fashion Spot]

MUSE OF THE WORLD: Tiscis 1st Scent, Palace Guard Banned for Calling Kate a Posh B**** and Gagas a Fairys Godmother

- Karl Lagerfeld responded in his typical thoughtful and sensitive manner when asked about Christophe Decarnin‘s departure from Balmain: ”Forget about it! This was a job done by a fashion editor. I don’t even know the name of the man who did it, so don’t ask me about that.” [Fashionologie]

- Britney Spears caused a minor riot when she made a surprise appearance at raptress Nicki Minaj‘s after party this weekend, causing six fans to reportedly hyperventilate and pass out from exhaustion dehydration excitement. The two femme fatales will tour this summer and recently collaborated on a remix of  future Song of the Summer,”Till the World Ends” with dumpster diver cum popstar Ke$ha. [MTV]

- 18-year-old Scots Guard Cameron Reilly should have been more guarded over his Facebook. The palace guard has been banned from the wedding march after lashing out online against Kate Middleton, calling her a “stupid, stuck up cow,” a “posh bitch” and asking who “gives a fuck about her?” after the future Princess apparently slighted him. Aww, someone’s got a crush! And someone needs to be put on 24-hour surveillance! [Daily Mail]

- Though she claims she never thought much about pursuing acting, after being tapped to host the ck one -sponsored MTV Push event, Lara Stone says she would “definitely be a Bond girl if they asked me. For sure — I would make a great evil Bond girl!” Now casting, Chesty Von Gaptooth for the next 007 flick. [WWD]

- Sir Elton John has confirmed that Lady Gaga is indeed the godmother to his newborn son Zachary, thus ensuring the gayest kid this side of Chaz Bono. [Daily Mail]

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Story by Lester Brathwaite

I was center square from 1969 to 1978, during which I perfected the art of the zing as well as a crippling cocaine addiction. Bea Arthur was responsible for both. @LesFabian lester dot brathwaite at gmail

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