Edited by Lester Brathwaite
Now, far be it from me to judge how your baby gets its rocks off. We were all once infants, eager to explore the world around us; sticking god-knows-what up god-knows-where all in the spirit of harmless adventure. But as a parent, you’ve gotta draw the line somewhere — and that line should preferably be in your baby’s stash of cocaine. A recent study of over 100 changing tables in shopping malls, hospitals, courts, police stations and even churches, for Lohan‘s sake, revealed that 92% had traces of Colombian nose candy. Personally, I blame this on that trashbag pusher Dora the Explorer and her drug mule, Diego, who’s been a little too go-go as of late, if you catch ma drift.